dude.

eeeep

so, it's already august 1st and i feel like this summer has totally just passed me by. not to say i haven't enjoyed it--because i have, i just feel like it's already over and that's sad. ugh, it's like, remember when you were a kid and school years seemed so long and you couldn't wait for summer break? remember when the grown-ups used to say "time only moves faster as you get older?" well, i remember hearing that so much and i remember thinking to myself "yeah right." i couldn't possibly conceptualize, at that age, how time could move any faster because i was always in a hurry to grow up (like most kids!) and it just couldn't happen soon enough. now my days are depressingly divided into this habitual system of waking up, working, going to school and partying. i feel like it's all becoming so boring but, when i look into the future, i don't see anything outside of that system that would make me feel like less of a robot. i feel like i might be approaching an existential crisis. maybe i've just been conditioned to fail. GAH! pull me out of this sludge we call existence...someone, please. i want to swim with sharks.

connie, i miss you.

  • Current Music
    electronic "for you"
dude.

New England newb

So, hi. It's been awhile...

I'm finally in Massachusetts and it's my birthday which kind of blows because I don't have any friends here to share the celebration with. I'm still waiting on a "happy birthday" phone call from someone, but I bet he already forgot about it. No surprise there.

My job is pretty sweet. For those of you who don't know what I'm doing here, and care to know, I am working at a paper for internship credit. That's right--a real life writer! It's not that exciting, except for the fact that I spent a half hour on the phone with the Director of Photography for "The Hip-Hop Project" and we talked about podcasts and the Black Panthers...ugh, AAAAND he's Jewish. Fuck--instant, unrealistic crush.

Anyways, I'm waiting around for my landlord to come pick me up because apparently she is my only friend out here and we are going out for my 22nd birthday. Fuck, I have now transcended out of my golden year and into a time period where birthdays don't matter anymore until you're over the hill. Ew.

I have attached some photos:
( Humble, New England AbodeCollapse )

love.
  • Current Music
    piebald "american hearts" you love it.
dude.

Sunshine State

Update: Dad lives in Punta Gorda, FLA. TRANSLATION: Retiree heaven!

I've been in Florida since Thanksgiving--odd change of pace/environment. I feel a bit lonely here and any contemplation I've had in the past about moving here has currently been erased. Yes, the weather is warm and the sun is shining and it's peaceful, but I've realized that I'm a true Yankee and I don't intend on trading in my Northern Lights for South Beach anytime soon. I want to return to bitter windchills and frosty windows. I want to return to my friends. Thankfully, I'm departing from Ft. Myers on Wednesday to return to Detroit bright and early.

I've had a lot of time to think. I've been able to come to terms with the fact that this world is ever-changing and I need to keep pace. It's a bit difficult when everything is changing at once, overwhelming to say the least. I guess all that anyone can hope for at the close are good memories, a challenging future and happy endings. Basically, what I've been trying to tell myself over the past year is to not let the end necessarily be the end, instead, manipulate it for a better beginning.

I hope my friends are able to adjust well and successfully in their new situations, as I'll be adjusting to old situations without them.


LOVE.