i often think about being something unreal. 

at all times, it does appear tatsuru is in a constant state of dissociation. as a young sex worker, he has to separate himself from his body, an object to be paid for, used and discarded. from the outside looking in, he’s a good student, a polite young man but does anyone really see his internal turmoil? those eyes tell of a never ending, insufferable storm within. 

i want to prove… i want…