I might be too American to fully appreciate the gravity of this situation, because it took me a few minutes after Emma's confession to even realize that it was going to be the main plot of the movie.
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More Netflix has somehow managed to make a pulpy Deliverance knockoff with all the tension and grit of a Target commercial. Charlize Theron spends most of the movie tumbling through river rapids while fleeing Taron Egerton, whose character presumably has the power of flight and/or teleportation. Pure content slop through and through.
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More Imagine how it feels for a friend or a family member to recommend Love Actually to you. You've known this person for years, and you respect their opinion, so you order this... thing... from Netflix as soon as possible. It arrives. You place it in your DVD player, hit play, and start watching.
At first, you think it's a joke. No way could this have been a serious recommendation, right? Nobody in their right mind could enjoy this gag-inducing corporateβ¦
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"Shit..."
(The audience waits in rapt anticipation for the next line of dialogue, on the edge of their seats. What piece of comedic genius shall Ryan Reynolds dispense next? What witty juxtaposition will the marketing team at Marvel Studios inflict upon the public this time? The suspense is palpable!)
"... Did I leave the stove on?"
(The theater is consumed by howls of laughter. Seats are kicked, knees are slapped, and tears stream down the audience's cackling faces. They snortβ¦
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