[ Dr. Darling looks like shit. He's managed to put on a button-up oxford, but he buttoned it poorly and they're all askew. He's not wearing a bow tie or a sweater, and his lab coat is also a bit of a mess. Noticeably, he has the making of a black eye, massive bruising on his neck, and small acid burns on the side of his mouth.

He looks jazzed, though. And even though he's tired and beat the fuck up, he's still radiating slightly manic energy. ]

Right. This is important. I've had my femoral artery cut and my neck snapped. I drunk acid and attempted to asphyxiate myself. I even tried to be decapitated. Each of those events should have killed me. None of them did. Which leads to my current hypothesis: something happened to turn off death on the Barge.

‘But Darling, you have a sample size of one,’ wrong, I have a sample size of two. I'm not the only inmate this happened to. Both of us didn't die after we left port, pool to the Nethermere still intact. My going theory is that the Admiral couldn't remove the pool, so he removed death itself.

[ There's a pause before, ] I still need more data, though. If any of you want to try and kill someone, I'd greatly appreciate that! Oh, plan it with them first though, that way we can get a wider range of ways to die that we can get data on.

Does anybody have a gun I can borrow? Also, can anyone in the infirmary do stitches?

[private to Ashton]
You weren't kidding about that acid blood, by the way. That shit packs a punch!


[spam for Varker]
Darling isn't an idiot. He's still slowly bleeding! His femoral artery is bleeding slowly, but still bleeding. Might as well make his way to the infirmary so that he can get this fixed.

His top half is exactly the same as described in his post. But his bottom half? Darling isn't wearing pants. He's just wearing his boxers. His leg is bandaged up, bloodstain slowly growing over the gauze. When he spots Varker, he gives him a tired little wave.

“Hello! Quick question, do you know how to do stitches? I'm pretty sure I need some!”