Dr. Alexander Hilbert (
tarakan) wrote in
lastvoyages2024-07-07 08:25 am
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[ 'You've lived through worse before. Hell, you'll probably live through worse after this. Put on your big girl boots, get angry, and keep going like the cockroach you are.'
When Hilbert speaks, his voice is carefully controlled and calm. He's filming from the desk in his room—his expression is also a carefully controlled neutral. The background of the room is as clean and as sterile as it usually is. ]
Considering that there is undoubtedly already speculation and gossip about, duty falls to me to set story straight. [ Yippee. He hates it. ]
Last port, Jacob Seed kidnapped me and subjected me to a mixture of classical conditioning and an unknown cocktail of drugs for unknown period of time—best guess is three to six days. The end result is that when he plays specific trigger, I enter fugue state. In said state, I am non-responsive to any questions, conversation, et cetera. I carry out whatever orders Seed has given. I do not know the limits of the orders, but considering that murder and petty theft are on table, I would assume that I would carry out any order.
[ The carefully controlled conversation continues. ]
I do not know what specifically triggers the fugue state, only that it is music. I will not ask any questions about how information was obtained if you manage to convince Seed to tell you specific trigger. Needless to say, if you see me walking around Barge in daze, unresponsive to questioning, you have full permission to lock me in broom cupboard until fugue state ends.
I will not be taking further questions at the time as, understandably, this is a lot to take in over a short period of time.
[filtered to the inmates]
[ 'I will not be taking questions' he says, like a liar. ]
I understand that Bright's post was needlessly obtuse and, whether he realizes it or not, designed to stir conflict and speculation. Unlike Bright, I remember that one can filter posts to a specific group. I will not be answering any questions from wardens as frankly, I do not want to deal with the vast majority of them at moment.
However, if any inmates have questions about incident, the steps taken to solve the incident, or wardens' behavior towards me when I was considered a suspect, I am more than happy to answer.
When Hilbert speaks, his voice is carefully controlled and calm. He's filming from the desk in his room—his expression is also a carefully controlled neutral. The background of the room is as clean and as sterile as it usually is. ]
Considering that there is undoubtedly already speculation and gossip about, duty falls to me to set story straight. [ Yippee. He hates it. ]
Last port, Jacob Seed kidnapped me and subjected me to a mixture of classical conditioning and an unknown cocktail of drugs for unknown period of time—best guess is three to six days. The end result is that when he plays specific trigger, I enter fugue state. In said state, I am non-responsive to any questions, conversation, et cetera. I carry out whatever orders Seed has given. I do not know the limits of the orders, but considering that murder and petty theft are on table, I would assume that I would carry out any order.
[ The carefully controlled conversation continues. ]
I do not know what specifically triggers the fugue state, only that it is music. I will not ask any questions about how information was obtained if you manage to convince Seed to tell you specific trigger. Needless to say, if you see me walking around Barge in daze, unresponsive to questioning, you have full permission to lock me in broom cupboard until fugue state ends.
I will not be taking further questions at the time as, understandably, this is a lot to take in over a short period of time.
[filtered to the inmates]
[ 'I will not be taking questions' he says, like a liar. ]
I understand that Bright's post was needlessly obtuse and, whether he realizes it or not, designed to stir conflict and speculation. Unlike Bright, I remember that one can filter posts to a specific group. I will not be answering any questions from wardens as frankly, I do not want to deal with the vast majority of them at moment.
However, if any inmates have questions about incident, the steps taken to solve the incident, or wardens' behavior towards me when I was considered a suspect, I am more than happy to answer.

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[Well there's two things here to unpack real quick: one, that Eiffel is truly, incandescently angry - and two, that it's on Hilbert's behalf.]
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But yes. 'What the hell' indeed.
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How dare he.
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Your support is appreciated. Do you have any questions?
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inmate filter;
[ Such as: medical procedures, since Hilbert's a doctor. ]
It would be nothing more than a bandaid solution, of course.
Also, my condolences about how the investigation went.
inmate filter;
[ just saying. ]
But noise canceling headphones should be easy enough. I will at least keep a pair on my person when taking infirmary shifts.
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At least it's a comfort to him that Jacob probably had already started this before they'd even met in port. It really wasn't that long ago that he arrived, was it? God he was so tired.]
Let me know if you need anything. [He's starting to feel like a person again, at least the reset has practically tapered off.] Even if it's just a distraction, I feel like we both deserve one.
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Hangover cure? Aspirin and sports drink is only doing so much.
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spam!
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I think it's important to document this, given the potential turnover and how easy it is to 'miss' people for long periods given comas, floods, and ports.
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Wasn't a coma that left you so tired then, was it.
What is it being done about Seed?
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[ And he HATES that. ]
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Either way, the voice that comes on is cold and closed off]
If my question is out of bounds, please inform me. But I have yet to see it answered in any of the places I have access to.
I was under the impression that the Admiral seized only the redeemable. Is this not the case?
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[ And any future messages from Malcolm will be left on read. ]
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[Rosita is now, will always be, a business first kind of girl.]
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I'm sorry that none of us realised you were missing.
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[ Said quietly. ]
Can I bring you anything?
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[ Sorry, Hilbert. He’s not good for offering much in the way of emotionality at times like this. ]
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But yes, alcohol is needed.
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I would like to know how other wardens reacted, but it's not an urgent question. I doubt that people acted in a way I think is sensible, though I can't deny that's often true back home.
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I do not think the murder weapon was ever established. Again, Bright said he saw me inject the victim with a chemical cocktail. After far too long, they finally checked my fingerprints against the syringe, but I do not think they ever checked for traces of the chemical compound to begin with.
Likewise, proper communication was poor. Plenty of people mentioned the murder victim's name over public network post before victim had even revived from death toll. I did not know why I was thrown into Zero for the longest time. And, again, Bright made needlessly obtuse post accessible to everybody instead of filtering it directly to wardens.
We are very lucky we do not have murder mysteries on regular basis. I have no faith they would actually be solved.
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In person
But then he does it. He tracks Hilbert down. If it's in the infirmary, so be it, but he's aiming for somewhere outside work. "Hey," he says quietly. "I understand if you want me to get lost, but I wanted to-- talk? Just for a little."
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At B's question, Hilbert pauses for a moment before answering, "That depends entirely on what you want to talk about."
His voice is deliberately controlled.
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so so sorry about how late this is
no worries!
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Technically it's a question, but you need anything?
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[ he's doing bad! it's real obvious! ]
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That said, he is still a little fond of Hilbert as an individual. He'd make a great ally against the Barge, if only he were willing to commit to more active sabotage.
Perhaps what happened is enough to push him in that direction? Perhaps an even greater good can be salvaged from Jacob's mistakes? That's why Pyotr ultimately decides to reach out, even though he's been laying low during this whole affair.]
Hello.
May I come and visit you? I still find it odd to speak over these things, especially about serious matters. However, if you are not comfortable receiving me at this time, I'll understand...
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Feel free to come and visit. Though you will understand if I speak about this matter broadly in some aspects.
[ Hilbert knows he got tortured. He is telling absolutely nobody the details of said torture. ]
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Opinion of him was already low. Now it is rock bottom.
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Are you okay now? Will you ever go back to being a zombie and not be able to snap out of it? Do you need some chocolate milk? How do you feel now that the loss of your sense of self is a tangible real concept and your humanity and autonomy has been completely ripped away leaving nothing but a hollow shell of a man as you carry out a task being nothing but a vessel for another person's actions?!
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[ Based on Hilbert's tone of voice, there's an obvious answer to this one. ]
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