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[Audio]

[Over the network comes the sound of a bizarre mechanical wheezing, like gears rocking back and forth]

H-hey. Hi everybody.

My name's Gortys and I'm a warden here and there's this egg and..

Oh gosh.

Michael? Could you come here and take care of this? Please? I don't, I mean, I'm not programmed to do anything like this and I'm so scared of it, but that doesn't make sense, does it? I mean. I'm a robot! I can't be scared. I shouldn't be, so...

Sorry!

Sorry, I'm trying not to be all explode-y. I'm in my room now but I don't wanna just LEAVE this egg here. Nobody come inside! If you hear a loud banging it means I've exploded or something.

[deep breaths. deep, calming breaths. the mechanical whirring stops]

[Private to People Gortys Considers Friends. Which is Most of the Ship Excluding Two Or Three People]

Hey, uh. Guys?

How do you know who you are if somebody can just come along and reprogram you into someone else?

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You can certainly be scared. May I come over in person? I don't believe you're going to explode.

But what if I do? I couldn't risk hurting you.

Quentin taught me how to create shields to defend myself. You couldn't hurt me if you wanted to, Gortys, and I know you don't want to.

[Hello he's here he's knocking on the door let him in please.]

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OOC; good to wrap?

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Indeed!

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Is someone threatening to do that to you?

No!

No, oh gosh. No. It's just something I haven't been able to stop thinking about.

[ Phew. Angel was ready to clap some ears. ]

I've heard that our experiences are what makes us but I don't think that is entirely true. We all have core programming. Even if someone came and wiped your drive, I don't think they would be able to get rid of everything.

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[ First William touches a hand to the door, feeling for heat or vibration. Listens, his ear pressed to it. Breath held. Then he bangs: one two. ]

You intact in there? [ Not friendly, but not belligerent either. ]

[Gortys sounds high-pitched and strained when she answers]

Yes!

Please go away? I don't wanna hurt you by accident!

[ Naturally, he moves in closer to the door.

Intrigued: ] Has that happened?

Edited 2020-09-18 02:00 (UTC)

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I don't know.

[His tone is soft. This is a shitty question with no good answer, but he's not going to lie about it.]

I don't really know it about humans either. We can get our programming scrambled just as badly as robots can, and usually by people who don't know what they're doing.

Do you want me to come over?

Really?

No, I don't want to hurt you, Rhys. I don't want to hurt anybody.

Yeah. But-- hey, right now, in this second, you're you, and you're pretty great.

And I'm not worried that you're going to hurt me.

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[She actually feels a little bad for Gortys, hearing this. Programming a machine to panic seems... cruel.]

You do sound a little scared. But who programmed you to feel that way?

I guess the scientists over at Atlas who programmed everything else into me. Why?

It just seems so unfair to make you feel upset over something you weren't programmed to do in the first place. How does that help you function?

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I'm on my way. Why are you scared of it? It's just an egg.

An annoying, needy egg.

[Honestly, he sounds a little concerned - not for the egg, but this is like, decidedly not Gortys.]

I don't like it, Michael. It's making me feel things.

Yeah, feelings can be hard, and annoying. But it's fine, this is just some stupid exercise the Admiral's orchestrating to try and torture us.

Besides, I've got your back: I've controlled the lives of four of the world's most annoying humans for hundreds of years, I can handle an egg for a few days.

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Never got this notif! Sorry!

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The trick is, one, to get into the habit of doing a little light self-programming, and two, to identify your regular variance and key priorities.

Every thinking thing is in a constant state of change. You take in new information, make choices, build habits, run processes. All of those contribute to make you more into a new person and less who you were before all you did all those things.

The more you think of yourself as changeable, but non-randomly, changing in the direction of the life you're living, the easier it is to see intrusions as, one, not destroying some previously untouched true version of you, and two, easier to assess and navigate around in comparison to the changing you that you've chosen.

But it was just a breach. I'm me again. I'm not anyone alive or human.

What do you call what you're doing, then, if not your life?

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I guess you decide for yourself who you want to be.

You don't think someone here would do that, do you? Is there a way to protect yourself?

But if 'I'm' erased from my memory, there's not any me left to decide!

No. Well, maybe. But no. Not right now, at least.

I'm worried about what's going to happen if I explode and my pieces aren't reassembled properly. Have robots ever died here on the ship?

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What is wrong? Has someone attacked you?

No! No, I'm okay, just don't come in.

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