I have been trying for months now to sell off what seems my entire life of collecting.. Lots of dolls, Disney toys, stuffed animals, old anime stuff from the teenager years, books, books, and more books, My Little Pony, wrestling magazines, etc..
I am so ready to just throw everything away. :|
I will even take five bucks for a lot..
I need everything GONE.
FUUUUU.
irritated— Watching Orange is the New Black with mom is SO, so painfully awkward.. With the lesbian sex scenes.. She decides to yell, 'I'm learning!'
-Started season three of The Crown. I still do not know why they couldn't just add makeup and the such to the previous actors but I do love me some Helena Bonham Carter. I miss Claire Foy and Matt Smith but the new cast is growing on me
-Going to start up Nurse Jackie next
-Our beautiful pool lays dormant. Ever since the irritation of the corona virus that forced mom to stay home these past months; all she does is play Facebook games and sleeps. Of course, she earned this rest and I am more than know I am a 'big girl', and should just 'grow up'; but swimming alone is terribly lonely and just not fun. :/ I want to keep my promise to establishing 'goals' daily to keep away from total isolation - I want to start early morning swims starting at ten minutes and then on to twenty, thirty, and on to a hour
-I miss silly things like window shopping at malls and actually sitting down physically in a restaurant. But I must admit that I am more negative than positive with being able to return to the city I love and see my friends. Though I suffer greatly blue from isolation, I have been able to save quite a good sum of money in my bank account. This would be nothing and dwindle down to in a snap - due to traveling, meals, and misc. during my adventures. I cannot tell yet how I will react after the levels of the ban are lifted completely but I DO hope I can control my small yet good amount of money.
-Along with the second issue above, no wrestling shows, no burlesque shows, concerts, or art trips anymore? The greatest city in the world is jam packed with fun and adventures all around.. Again, I do want and hope I can control myself. Everything in moderation, yes?
contemplativeI have been going through a hazardous train wreck break up for the past few months.
Perhaps I will gain the courage to crack open the crazed blender of treacherous feelings and be able to journal about it..
I have rejoined OK Cupid and actively looking for female companion again..
How I miss the affection.. But I have to admit. I feel like this will sweep the poisonous tracks left behind from my broken heart.
I was talking to my brother on the phone and both can admit how we smother the people we think we're in love with..
It hurts. It just really, really fucking hurts.
I need to keep myself occupied, both mentally and physically.
- Actually call doctors and keep appointments. Since schools are closed mom can take me. My dad has even been kind enough to offer to take me.
-I do love to read but I go into terrible slumps and simply ignore my over sized 'to read' book pile. Must. Fix This.
- Swim, swim, and swim! We opened our pool on memorial day. I adore swimming and the first swim of the season was amazing!
We will be going to court again. If he is produced from the jail, I will plead to the judge for leniency. He is facing 10-12 years, he will be rotting away in a cell. That's not your loved one, it's a addict. Drugs has destroyed my family and we are slowly breaking down. The insurance will only cover two weeks in a rehab in the hospital. It's a joke, it's simply not enough; insanity. The judge will rule and my heart will drop. He will never see me get married. He will never see my children being born and become a uncle. How many more missed holidays? How many missed birthdays?
crushed
