Sara; She/Her, Elder Millennial/Xennial/Fandom Old (40s), Maine, USA (EST). Currently possessed by Heated Rivalry, Arthur/Eames from Inception, and the Star Wars Prequels.
they should invent a high ponytail that doesn’t give me a headache and they should invent a low ponytail that doesn’t make me look like a miller’s apprentice going off to enlist in the continental army
there’s very few things that drive me up the wall in fandom as much as this weird new assumption that fandom is primarily a space for younger people that older folks are only accepted into in a trial basis if they promise to centralize and accommodate younger fans, and further, anything else is creepy and predatory. IT’S OKAY FOR ADULTS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR OTHER ADULTS.
if I have to read “women in their 30s” used as an insult one more time I swear I’ll - step away from that user and just hang out with the other grownups who consistently create good content because I’m also an adult and too busy comparing car insurance to fight with teenagers on the internet, but goddAMMIT I’ll be annoyed
I’ve been in this hole since yall lil shits were three apples tall and I’ll die in this hole too
As they say, there are people in the world who think that anything which was not made for them should not exist. Your job as a creator is to absolutely never make anything for these people.
You cannot please everyone. If you try, you will please no one. And no matter what you do, you will have haters. The better your work and the more loved it is, the more and louder will be your haters. Hate mail is proof you’re doing something that matters.
I crave more fics where shane Spells It Out about how he and ilya hid for years. i need his parents and hayden crying about it.
On his real estate career:
“i had to buy a whole other house i pretended to live in just so people wouldn’t guess we were secretly together. imagine if you had to do that with jackie”
On why it’s so important everyone knows they’re married:
“i’m almost thirty and my whole career i couldn’t have my parter being my next of kin, emergency contact, or power of attorney. instead it was my mum like i’m still a child”
On why he loves spending his time with ilya:
“did you know that in the ten years we’ve been together we’ve never even had breakfast together. everything we had was rushed, clandestine, kept under wraps so we didn’t loose our livelihoods and reputation”
Bonus Ilya explaining the russia of it all
“my father was high ranking military officer. my brother is police. we have connections in high places…it would be an embarrassment, for many people if my sexuality is out. probably they will not put me on trial, i am too famous, but they would make me disappear. block my bank accounts, revoke my passport. make me no longer citizen of russia. make me no one”
if you are in the Thunder Bay area, the Whitesand First Nations families who have evacuated their homes burning down in Ontario are requesting supplies or monetary dnations
why haven’t I seen anyone posting about that giant fucking baby penguin in Melbourne that’s bigger than some of the adults already
his name is Pesto <3
this bastard weighs 46 lbs at 9 months old. he’s 22 lbs heavier than his PARENTS
OMG I SAW THIS LAD IN PERSON AND LOST EVERY OUNCE OF SHIT I’VE EVER POSSESSED
Look at him!
Also he was separated with one of his parents when I saw him but obviously wanted to Be Where The People Penguins Are so they’d set him up with a little rock stool so he could gaze upon his brethren:
Which enabled me to capture the single funniest video I’ve ever taken of anything in my life:
All hail Pesto! The king of chonk!
He’s adventurous, cheeky, sings to the caretakers who clean his enclosure and has been seen CANOODLING with a penguin named Pudding.
This whole obsession with wheelchair users struggling on foot down the aisle at their wedding or across the stage for graduation is 100% powered by ableism.
“The heartwarming story of how one woman worked for 8 months straight so she could escape the horror that is being in wheelchair for a few short minutes to struggle slowly and painfully down the aisle on her special day.”
“the horror that is being in a wheelchair” bitch it’s hella better than struggling slowly & painfully down the aisle ffs
“Despite being permanently paralyzed, her one goal since her accident has been to walk across the stage for graduation. The whole crowd gave her a standing ovation and broke into tears when she dragged her paralyzed legs across the stage with the help of leg braces and a walker to collect her diploma, after which she immediately sat back down in her wheelchair, which she will use to move around for the rest of her life.”
How the hell is this an inspirational story? This person needs better goals. And a therapist.
They’re toxic in an even greater way because as a disabled person, I didn’t realise till I was reading this how much I had internalised that. I genuinely have had feelings of fear and shame about using a chair or a walker if I get married. And why? Because I’m constantly seeing “heartwarming” stories about disabled people who shed their mobility aids for that moment. Why the hell am I afraid of using them to get married? Anyone who marries me or attends the wedding will know I need them and love me regardless.
Bless this post for making me realise I’d internalised that shit.
These types of stories teach people, both abled and disabled, that using mobility aids, especially wheelchairs, is inferior.
here are some beautiful brides in chairs with dresses they ROCK. I know a lot of disabled ppl with internalized ableism think they “won’t look good” if they use their chair, but here’s some literally gorgeous gals for ur consideration
(that last ones cute as fuck and i teared up at it)
Who needs a bouquet when you can be a bouquet?
I made my addition to this post in June 2019. Its now January 2020 and I no longer feel guilty about the idea of going down the aisle one day with mobility aids.
God bless the disabled community, y'all saved me from some internalised bullshit
This post floated by a few months ago, and I remember something to effect of there’s a difference between recovery and refusal. That is, like, I have a friend that suffered an incomplete spinal cord injury. He can walk again now, and I don’t think I’ve seen him use his chair in a few years. When he walked at his graduation, it was to show off his recovery. That he wasn’t quite ready to go through a full day upright, but he could walk across a stage, unassisted, and soon he would be able to do that every day. There’s also a difference in someone like me choosing to not use a mobility aid. My mobility is intensely fluid, especially seasonally. So, I would plan a summer wedding. And while I love my cane it can also be the biggest pain in my ass, so I’d want to just go unassisted. But that’s normal for me, at least right now. I can walk without an aid during about half of the year. It’s reasonable to assume I can make it through one day without it. All of that is different than someone that is fully and permanently paralyzed, that will never walk again, dragging themselves along because they feel that’s somehow better. Overall though, my biggest takeaway is fuck the media. Because disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.
Disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.
THIS.
Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to add my disabled joy to this post. Look at this love!
Taking the opportunity to add these photos of Jessica Kellgren-Fozard and her wife Claudia, from this twitter post. Jessica also has a youtube channel that’s primarily about disability and chronic illness and LGBT stuff (it’s amazing!)
I would also like to personally share, Annika Victoria who ALSO has a youtube channel. This photo was taken from her instagram - she made her wedding dress dress herself, BY HAND. Her youtube channel is mostly DIY fashion and sewing tutorials. I love her so much, she’s so unapologetically herself and informative
I also wanna add these pictures of Ade Adepitan fucking rocking this badass suit at his wedding! Give my fellow disabled mascs some love too
look how much fun they’re both having! yes!
and also this couple, who are both wheelchair users
this is from their beautifully coordinated wedding!
@this-is-ableism it starts off talking about ableism and turns into a wonderful celebration of disabled people that I thought you may enjoy.
it does suck that the government defunded PBS but it’s also so fucking funny that now that they don’t take uncle sam’s slavery dollars they’re running videos like “How america’s foundation was built on genocide”
no more being polite about it fuck the USA
PBS Origins my beloved! for the unfamiliar, channel link here. they’ve been pointing out how fucked up USA history is for a while, but not quite that overtly.
and while I’m here I’ll plug some other channels because PBS does solid work. also, iirc they are (…were? I’m not actually sure what applies to them now that they’ve been defunded) legally required to include captions and they actually do that, so you won’t run into auto-generated nonsense.
I haven’t checked out PBS Documentaries yet, but they have some stuff tackling similar topics. (I am adding things to my watchlist as we speak.) channel link here.
PBS Eons has some super cool videos on the history of life on Earth, channel here, and Storied does awesome work on linguistics and mythology, channel here.
aaand while we’re talking about defunded USA public media that doesn’t pull punches when critiquing our history and government, I am once again going to plug a couple NPR podcasts. Throughline does deep-dives on history, culture, laws, and so on (link here); I’m especially partial to their We the People miniseries, which covers our rights from the Amendments. Code Switch covers culture, focusing on race and minority groups, and has been doing some especially good coverage on what the Trump administration’s fuckery means on a practical level (link here). (these aren’t the only NPR podcasts that talk about this stuff, but they’re the big ones afaik.)
“some people don’t deserve redemption” redemption isn’t something that’s deserved, it’s something someone does. it’s making the choice to change the way you live your life, to be better, to do good things instead of bad things and try to make up for the bad things. and everyone can and should do that, at any time, no matter what they’ve done. we can’t change the past, but we can choose what kind of person to be now and in the future. we have the responsibility to do so. it is so completely not about “deserving.”
