bobby

things have been getting better, i still hear voices but atleast their nice and people i know, my friend came over i havent seen in a while, also, i seen katrina, it was fun she didnt make fun of me this time. i still got like nervous and anxiety problems and no insurance so its gonna be hard to work, if i ever can get a job. im gonna try and drink or smoke bcuz it would be nice. what am i supposed to do, its all fucked up now, im out like.........smoking.

today was just like anyother day i guess, giant corporations of witchcraft ripping me apart or so it seems, smoking my life away, and wondering what im gonna do with my life. ummm. im not gonna write anything so im gonna have to rob you and your family to goto college. im be so bored around here. i dont know what to do with myself but i find things to do i guess. the voices i hear are just so bothersome, it makes me wanna smack my lips and go oh stop, while flinging my wrist. why should i live like this, so hollow at night, so invaded by many. wondering thru the dark stumbling on dirty clothes.
im out like christianity

im clean and sober, i cant work, and my voices answer back, and its like im on a lost journey in my mind and nothing makes any sense and theres nothing to figure out, i have no money to finish school, i need some cocaine, or to get drunk its been way tooo long, my head is all out of air so stop tsssss'ing it,im going to fucking fly a kite next week in the middle of snow storm, blizzards come in october around here. its weird, thats all i guess, im out like...........me

i dont know maybe she just wanted to fuck or something. i dont like it how i find out things late. i havent wrote in here for a while becuz i been writing rap songs like everyday and constantly praying, and waiting for a job to call me back. and its starting to look like itll never happen. and for me theres no future in rapping. my parents are going away this weekend. and i get to sit here, all alone, with nothing to do. and i dont want any guys to come over there arent in my family. its strange to turn everyone against you but they forgive you anyway. the plans dont work right if they think theres money in the way. why cant i cut all my connections, without them comming back. friends dont know that they keep you off track.

well today was bullshit, i stayed up all day and night. then me and bryan were hanging out for lil bit, then katrina comes over and starts smoking everyones cigarettes. And we gotta argue with her, for like half an hour to go get her own, if that aint using someone, jeez. then she takes like 2 shots of vodka, and is acting like a complete fool. So after just hanging out for a lil bit, bryan says he can get us some pills and the guys gonna meet us at the gas station. so we argue about this for like 20 minutes, cuz she dont wanna go for god knows why, so we end up sitting on my porch, me and bryan sober, and her ACTING, or drunk, but i doubt she was drunk, then she says im tryin to use her like i had this shit planned out or something, that is such bullshit. im glad shes not my fucking girlfriend or id be back to hittting walls.

things have been goin ok i guess. katrina spent the night the other day and it was great. we were just talking and hanging out all night. i never thought id be watching porn with her, let alone do what we did. it was definately a really great memory. hopefully we'll make some more great memories this weekend. unless i got up north, then i fear i might get shot, cuz of my dreams, and what not. but noone needs to worry there selves over that. i need a job bad, but im not really looking cuz, i havent put myself back together all the way after, me and ginny, and all my head problems. anyway. i think thats all i have to write about, i was gonna start raping again, but i dont think i should.

my life is such fucking horseshit, just when i stop losing my mind and hearing voices, im gonna get jumped shot or robbed. aint that just the luck. yeah im an asshole life sucks, ill get over it. AND FUCk YOU MUTHAFUCKA.

01. Who are you, what's our relationship:
02. How and where did we meet:
03. What's my middle name:
04. How long have you known me:
05. Tell me one good thing about myself:
06. When you first saw me what was your impression:
07. My age:
08. Birthday:
09. My favorite band at the moment:
10. Color eyes:
11. Do i have any siblings:
12. Have you ever had a crush on me:
13. What's one of my favorite things to do:
14. Do you remember one of the 1st things I said to you:
15. Describe me in 3 words:
16. Name 5 things i love:
17. Do you think i'm good looking(be honest):
18. How would you describe me to someone:
19. Would you ever date me:
20. Tell me one thing you've always wanted to say but never did:
21: What do you like most about me:
22: If we could spend a day together what would we do:
23: Have we ever gotten in a fight:
24: Do you think we will be friends for at least 3 or 4 more years:
25. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
26. What do you think my weakness is?
27. Do you think I'll get married?
28. What makes me happy?
29. What makes me sad?
30. What reminds you of me?
31. If you could give me anything what would it be?
32. When's the last time you saw me?
33. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
34. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
35. Are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what I say about you?
36. If I was an ice cream flavor, which would I be and why?
37. What song (if any) reminds you of me?
38. If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?
39. Would you make a move on me?
40. Do I cross your mind at least 1 time a day?
41. If you could change one thing about our relationship past present and future what would it be?

today when i woke up i went to my sisters, and played video games and hung out with my family for a lil while and shit, so tomarrow im supposed to fight or something about a girl suckin someones dick. and fuckin which is a bunch of fuckin bullshit, cuz im not getting so why the fuck should i fight someone over this bullshit. FUck you all. ummm hi katrina, tomarrow im taking bottles back and getting high. and thats gonna be fun. and then play games with peoples heads so thats gonna rock.sometimes i wish i was dead. but then other times i just wanna kill people, and then theres those times when i just want a nice happy life and a wife, and a good job and still be able to do drugs and drink, and then theres those times when i just wanna fuck and fuck and fuck and fuck.

today i had an ok day i guess,i cleaned the fuck out of my room, and thats really good i guess. a saw some old sorta friends kinda. It was nice, i guess, a nice little chat. She gave me a reference for a job. So in a week or so when my urines clean, ill go apply and shit . Itd be nice to have a job. Before i kicked out. Get a car and shit and hang out with myself. My said kat was pretty again today and asked about us getting together. Hmmmm now is this me manifesting or was it there first, i dont know, but i know i was right and were being forced together.i think im turning into a celebrity stalker killer, and i dont think id mind, it looks like thats where my fats going. someone has too to keep the balance in order and take revenge for these damn teens who killed there selfs. if eminems life was in my hands what would i do? Manufacture suicide in a pill and give it to the beautiful singers and rappers who ruin lives and give it to the next batch of suicidal rules and start the process over.i think i should just forget about all that shit. ......................-----------0-0090-0