14 degrees? I think so, brrrrrr.
Tired. I sneaked OBOO's disc out of his movie case, the one going back to library. Sure enough, he came home and took the case back before I knew it. He asked politely if I had it, I said yes, I'd take it back.
I just got bored. Before that, someone was giving someone else utter hell, I don't know who on either end. I got back to my bedroom, and realized I couldn't remember even the verbal exchange, in addition to not knowing who it is in the first place. (someone just said "fist")
I really shouldn't have touched older bother's DVD, was stupid and I knew it, since mr. hair trigger waiting to get in a fight and then blame it on me.
I was bored. By golly. I did not go to the new year's eve thing thrown by linda, just decided it would be boring, scrabble etc. I am much more used to living in my head. also last time I was with that crowd, who are kind of dubious in a way to me anyway, I felt like I was something soft on top of a rock with a sieve being pushed down on top of me. I went through a whole weird thing I would compare to experiencing emotional synesthesia.
That was in spring, more or less, of '09. I think it was because of gearing up to whole mode of living life as a multiple, without trying to deny it any more.
I got a couple things in the washer last night, nice because it's a sign I am not as depressed as I feel.
Ech, I am playing puzzle pirates. I really have just been sitting at the computer for ...hours. I need to get up, get a drink, something to eat. It's just that i have a decent computer, Don't feel like giving it up!
Bettina is now Bellea. That happens, J gave her a new name. I think she never knew what her name was, then saw Waya's Bettina got locked in a bedroom. Maybe she felt all alone. I think there was Meagol in the system, and also Mila came up, or out of the closet first time I knew of. I knew she was there, did not know she was associated with my parents divorce. Didn't even know it was a key event. I just remember thinking, how will the family get by? Then feeling ashamed, and wondering why?They met Jay and went to the House at the Lake, presumably.
WE're getting a $10 gift card from Borders, with points we built up at MyPoints--all without buying a darn thing, tho' it sure took a long time to build all those points up.
We were thinking of giving it to Sis, for birthday, but we seem to have folks in system who reject any and all attempts to do anything like that. We briefly thought of calling Don and Margaret, since we were housesitting this week, then...duh. Just a lot going on in the head or...being shy. We need to make some kind of decision about Kaybee. I had a dream of Pat telling me she is scared to front again. And like so many times, I didn't even know who was fronting and when I find out, I don't even know who they are. If it's George, Ben, Ty, Sandy, Fianna, I tend to know who.
I am pretty sure there is a "Helling" in the system, who i think was named after someone who was "just taking care of himself (and self only)" This is from around the time of Fianna. About 1984. So I need to talk to this person. I think I can feel her now, one of the fumers. Sorry, but it's true.
Some of us are okay with her, but some are leary. Some don't care one way or the other.
I am really tired, going to take of and get something to eat.
Thanks whoever did the laundry.
& we now have elephant icons from Waya, will have to get at a better computer to deal with getting them uploaded.
I just got bored. Before that, someone was giving someone else utter hell, I don't know who on either end. I got back to my bedroom, and realized I couldn't remember even the verbal exchange, in addition to not knowing who it is in the first place. (someone just said "fist")
I really shouldn't have touched older bother's DVD, was stupid and I knew it, since mr. hair trigger waiting to get in a fight and then blame it on me.
I was bored. By golly. I did not go to the new year's eve thing thrown by linda, just decided it would be boring, scrabble etc. I am much more used to living in my head. also last time I was with that crowd, who are kind of dubious in a way to me anyway, I felt like I was something soft on top of a rock with a sieve being pushed down on top of me. I went through a whole weird thing I would compare to experiencing emotional synesthesia.
That was in spring, more or less, of '09. I think it was because of gearing up to whole mode of living life as a multiple, without trying to deny it any more.
I got a couple things in the washer last night, nice because it's a sign I am not as depressed as I feel.
Ech, I am playing puzzle pirates. I really have just been sitting at the computer for ...hours. I need to get up, get a drink, something to eat. It's just that i have a decent computer, Don't feel like giving it up!
Bettina is now Bellea. That happens, J gave her a new name. I think she never knew what her name was, then saw Waya's Bettina got locked in a bedroom. Maybe she felt all alone. I think there was Meagol in the system, and also Mila came up, or out of the closet first time I knew of. I knew she was there, did not know she was associated with my parents divorce. Didn't even know it was a key event. I just remember thinking, how will the family get by? Then feeling ashamed, and wondering why?They met Jay and went to the House at the Lake, presumably.
WE're getting a $10 gift card from Borders, with points we built up at MyPoints--all without buying a darn thing, tho' it sure took a long time to build all those points up.
We were thinking of giving it to Sis, for birthday, but we seem to have folks in system who reject any and all attempts to do anything like that. We briefly thought of calling Don and Margaret, since we were housesitting this week, then...duh. Just a lot going on in the head or...being shy. We need to make some kind of decision about Kaybee. I had a dream of Pat telling me she is scared to front again. And like so many times, I didn't even know who was fronting and when I find out, I don't even know who they are. If it's George, Ben, Ty, Sandy, Fianna, I tend to know who.
I am pretty sure there is a "Helling" in the system, who i think was named after someone who was "just taking care of himself (and self only)" This is from around the time of Fianna. About 1984. So I need to talk to this person. I think I can feel her now, one of the fumers. Sorry, but it's true.
Some of us are okay with her, but some are leary. Some don't care one way or the other.
I am really tired, going to take of and get something to eat.
Thanks whoever did the laundry.
& we now have elephant icons from Waya, will have to get at a better computer to deal with getting them uploaded.