Kermit The Fraud

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
ratcash
fishingboatproceeds

Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick….. That’s when I’m satisfied.
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specialagentartemis
specialagentartemis

When you’re at the bus stop on time: bus schedules are more like guidelines than hard rules, really. You will sit in the 90 degree heat for an extra 15 minutes past the scheduled arrival time wondering if the bus has decided to just skip today and you will like it.

When you are running even a single minute late: the noble city bus has a schedule to keep and it will dally not a single second longer. Be better

batmanisagatewaydrug
batmanisagatewaydrug

I was trying to describe something that was pissing me off but xkcd already articulated it better than I could

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I'm just like. I'm very tired of the hyper individualist cynicism that's so common on here, where so many tumblrinas feel very confident saying that nobody can read, everyone is dumb, most people are unwashed dullards etc. except for me, the very special tumblr user who's smart enough to notice that everyone else is very stupid. come on now.

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I don’t make a lot of personal posts these days. And I talk about big studio tentpole superhero TV shows going straight to streaming services even less. But there’s some fundamental truths we have to acknowledge here:

1) American Vandal is one of the funniest and most insightful TV shows of the past decade

2) “Jimmy Olsen gets up to stupid hijinks” is the premise of some of the best comics

3) The Superman 2025 movie was really good, and the entire Daily Planet cast was amazing, and it was kind of bullshit to only have them for 10 minutes when they seemed to beg for a weekly TV show

4) Gorilla Grodd, the giant evil telepathic gorilla from the Secret Invisible Hidden City known as Gorilla City, is secretly the best Flash villain of all time

5) The American Vandal creative team are getting paid Warner Brothers money to do another season of it, but with a 2-Ton Telepathic Evil Gorilla


So, in conclusion….this might be the only good thing to happen, ever?

American Vandal Jimmy Olsen gorilla grodd Superman