Sunday
however stupid you think the average American voter is, you are probably still overestimating them
ah! so you’re the grimey little pimp who i hired to bathe me in wet kinetic sand, are you?
I need a blowjob but I don’t have a penis or a strap on and I’m not taking off my pants so you’re just gonna have to figure it out
the crazy thing about this place called “grocery store” is that you always need to go there. especially if you like, just went.
i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.
this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.
anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:
no you don't understand. i do international regulation of emerging technologies for a living. this WAS me stress dreaming about work
Male loneliness this, male loneliness that. Have they tried lobotomies? Tranquilizers? Being fingered by medical professionals? Tearing the yellow wallpaper off the walls of the attic room where your husband keeps you locked up?
