City Girl

So, I've spent the last few days working at a homeless shelter. This is a women's only shelter, part of a larger group of shelters organised by redacted. In other words, every woman here has chosen to be away from men for whatever reason. These reasons include experiences with domestic violence and sexual abuse.

Sadly, all of this is relevant. *

On Christmas day, a DJ came in to entertain the guests for a few hours. My first experience with him was when he greeted me with "hello gorgeous", stood far too close, and generally came off as drunk. Later, I had to walk past him while escorting a guest, and he tried to gather our attention by changing the words of a song and singing at us. I told the guest that if he bothered her at all, she should tell us, and she told me she intended to ignore him. On the way back I saw him dancing with guests, which struck me as being slightly inappropriate.

What I didn't see, or discover till later was that he was, while dancing, physically grabbing guests and volunteers. He was also making comments about how lucky we were to have him there, since he was the only man, and that an engaged volunteer was 'useless to [him]'.

He also brought a friend along, and they were very clearly discussing women while leering at them, from the stage and the corner of the room.

Since he was only there for an hour or so, we didn't gather enough information to kick him out before he was ready to leave. At the end of the shift, volunteers were asked whether or not he had made them uncomfortable, and more than half said he had.

I later found out that this was his third year in a row, but due to communication failures, he kept being booked. However, at this point, the shift leaders were in agreement that he was not welcome back.

He then turned up again on boxing day, when he wasn't scheduled, and began setting up. We (in the office) didn't realise he was there until a guest made a complaint. We threw him out, and raised holy hell, making sure that everyone involved knew that he was never again to be booked for our shelter or any other within redacted. Especially after a volunteer witnessed him snorting cocaine after he'd been kicked out.

For me the kicker of the story is that he was a volunteer, too. He wasn't someone we'd booked who saw an opportunity - he was going out of his way to be a creepy bastard.

* Obviously, it would still be creepy if he was behaving this way in any other environment, don't get me wrong. I just want to illustrate just how inappropriate his behaviour was.

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I haven't posted in a while, have I?  I've been busy with my blog, The Krav Vegan, and advertising it on Twitter.

That person we saw get hit by a car did die, probably on impact.  His name was Ash, and he was twenty-two, my age.

David and I broke up a while back.  I'm dating Anthony now, who is much nicer.  And fitter.  It's awesome.^_^

I saw someone get hit by a car last night, on Smallbrook Queensway. Anthony tried CPR, I called 999, along with a few other people. There were no visible injuries, just blood pouring out of his mouth. The police were nearby, and they helped until the ambulance arrived. They put him in the recovery position, so they thought he was still alive, I guess. He wasn't any older than me. Looked younger. So small. So much blood. Anthony was covered in it. It leaked all over the road.

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I signed up for the BRMB Walkathon on the 8th May. 26.2 miles around the city, to raise money for the Birmingham Children's hospital.

Anyone know of any good podcasts to listen to while training? They work better than music, for long walks. I've got Freakonomics and some stuff from The Stand atm. Comedy is good, but I'm open to other ideas.

Also, how are you all?

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I love my new iPhone.

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Hi.  It's been a busy few months.

This year, it looks like I'll be doing a lot of travelling alone.  For that reason and others, I want to be able to defend myself.  I want to learn a martial art, but I don't know which kind.

What I want is to be able to defend myself, as I said.  I don't want to attack people, or hurt them.  I want to be able to put people on the floor if they attempt to grab me, and give myself time to run away.  I want to be able to extricate myself if someone gets ahold of me.  I'd like the confidence of knowing I can do that.

For that reason, I'm thinking a more defensive art, like akido, would suit me.  However, both my mother and stepfather are akido instructors, so it would be hard to take lessons in the city without running into them or someone who knows them, which I would rather not do.  I don't know much about different kinds of martial arts, so it's hard to know which one to pick.

I'm also thinking that a more generic women's self-defence class might work, since that would more specifically deal with the scenarios I'm thinking of.  I'm not really sure who to ask or where to look.  Any ideas?  I could look for martial arts forums, I guess, but those would generally be focused on just the one art, wouldn't they?

I did some googling but most articles seemed to focus on how to choose a good instructor once you've decided on a martial art.  I did finally find the kind of guide I wanted, though, here.  It looks like jiu jitsu or krav maga would be best.

I gave blood for the first time last Thursday.

Was not so bad, akcherly. Don't know what I was afraid of.

I haven't been able to access my messages for the last six months. There's at least four in there that I can't read.

Here's a repost from the no_poo comm.  No_poo'ing (and yes, I know it's a silly name) is basically giving up on commercial shampoos.  You start by washing your hair with baking soda and vinegar mixes, with the eventual aim of reaching the point where your hair can do without either.  I kept seeing people mentioning it, so I decided to try it.  Anyway;

I'm now on Day 10.  I'm mixed race, Indian/English, with hair a cross between the two - that is, dark and prone to oiliness, but also a bit flyaway and staticy sometimes.  I usually shampoo and condition every one to four days or so, depending on how presentable I need to look.  I'm a bit of a lazy slattern, sometimes.  My hair's about an inch past my shoulders, and was dyed about a year ago.   Although I dyed it back, the bits that have had dye on them have been lightened by the sun, so it's quite clear which bits of hair have had chemicals on them, and which bits haven't.  I live in an area with soft water.  My hair is 2aCiii, according to this.  I've suffered with dandruff for the past fifteen years, which varies a lot.  At the moment, I get flakes, particularly after washing, but it's nowhere near as bad as it has been.  I also have excema behind my ears, although I don't think it notices how I clean my hair.

Here's an update of the last ten days.  I wrote this up after they'd occurred, from notes in the hair-diary I've been keeping, so tenses are all over the place.

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I also read up on OCM today, and I think I'll try that as well.  I hate how dry and tight my face feels after washing, and it can't be good for it.  Does anyone have any ideas for natural bubble baths or body washes, too?

I noticed on my last post I was tagged as an "Indian User".  I'm not sure that's accurate - my hair is half-Indian, but I'm not in India.  Perhaps Asian hair?  I know Americans use Asian colloquially to mean people only from certain parts of Asia, but I'm not convinced that the hair is that different in type.

Edit; a few pictures of my hair.

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Other stuff I did today; deep-cleansed my face with a mix of castor and olive oil, and epilated my calves and underarms for the first time.

Bad new is, I lost my glasses.  Good news is, I just found out that I can buy frames cheaper online.  I found the exact frames I had before for £30 less.  That's not bad.:D

Article and links here.