I never wanted to be a painter, I wanted to be a tapdancer

im trying and that is what is important.
I am being more than I have ever been before.
old Habits die hard.
Old opinions die even harder.
I am working everything one thing at a time.
a struggle is only to be expected.
I am understanding what it is to be content with ones self (trying).
one day at a time

Its a FUCKIN leap year... MAKE IT COUNT!!!!!!!

bills bills bills......



someone should give me money , a car, and a heart thats not broken

watch me from away .. ill do the same


i promise

my fig tree had died.. and I am alone. I am never gonna die my soul is torn and all I want is to be left alone

most of the time i just want to rip my eyes out. I cant stand it at all. then sometimes I cant get enough of it. it makes me want to vomit.



Im stressed my whole body hurts my head is pounding.. I might have a concustion(sp) w/e maybe Ill bleed to death on the inside while I sleep.
how poetic. do die beatiful on the outside. and bleeding to death on the inside... makes you think doesnt it.

and its for me only for me not for you not for you not for you.......... but i will always rember you.




xoxo
russell

i love you joe


thats all needs to be said no form shape or matter all that matters is


i love you joe


and you know that



xoxoxo
russ

its just not fair pretty mucfh that is it sometimes things are just not fair
that is all

that is all



im just wanna sign out
russ