I got a new tattoo today. It's my first in like 2 years or something. I think this is the most impulsive tattoo I have. It's in reference to the old HXC slogan, "flex your head," which is a sentiment that I've always liked, but I think it falls a little short. We shouldn't just be smart, we should be compassionate.
Last night an ex took me out for belated birthday drinks, and afterward she stayed the night at my house. We cuddled and talked, then held each other as we slept, but nothing else. It was really nice.
I had kind of a fitful sleep, and had interesting dreams about this person next to me. One was a dream where we left a house in the suburbs at night, and we both had to drive cars somewhere in a similar direction, but different destinations. I was driving ahead of her, and continually almost lost her and almost got into accidents. The other dream took place in a supermarket, and we were both buying the same ingredients, but were going to make different meals at our respective places for different people.
It's rare that I remember my dreams, and even rarer when the metaphors are so thick.
I've spent a good portion of my days this past week working on SeattleDIY's website. I'm really happy with how it's come together. Thank you fancy WordPress CMS, you've made my life a shit-ton easier. I'm really stoked because it now won't just be me putting everything together and maintaining it - it's now way more community-collaborative and there's the ability include a lot more information and ways of letting people share what's going on.
Two more weeks or so of break from school. Uh. What else should I be doing with myself? I've barely left the house lately, largely because of the snow. Tomorrow we're having a house rummage sale, then later there's the 2012 party at the holy mountain. Sundays will be busy too. Hooray.
I'm in school now for the first time in 7 years. Whoa. Going to Seattle U is alright - most of the teachers that I've met with seem pretty great, but of course the student body is a little lacking. Thus far it's primarily a lot of white christians from the suburbs. Still, I'm stoked for two of my classes, cuz my good buddy Becky is in them too! She's fucking awesome, and I'm really excited to have her as a study buddy.
I was kind of dreading having the SeattleDIY meeting today for some reason. Then a few kids came, and when we all started talking I started to feel energized about a bunch of the stuff we're doing. I guess I'm just feeling the burden of having so much of the shit-work on my shoulders and not having a very effective way of allowing other people to feel empowered with taking stuff on.
Saturday was super busy - woke up late and went straight to the Really Really Free Market. It was a small group, but nice. I did some yoga, played the muppet babies theme song on guitar, and drank a bunch of coffee. After that I played a show on KEXP. That was really awkward, and not really my jam. After scoring Jonny some food we played at The Holy Mountain for the HTFC benefit show. It went super well, and really late. We raised a few hundred for Jake and Rebecca, and when we played it was one of the most fun times I've had with Bow + Arrow in a while.
After the show I got invited to hang out at this house on the water by Eastlake with a few random kids. I rode over there at 3am, then sat on a dock talking to Alana and Amy until 5:30 in the morning. Us and Lucas all slept in a super cozy bed with just one blanket between the four of us. I had a hilarious fat cat sleeping on me most of the night.
I feel like life could go in a few different directions right now. To quote a wonderful woman I know, I'd like to be, "receptive without expecting." I've yet to see how being in a school schedule is going to affect things. We'll see.
This past week has been pretty wonderful. Lots of hanging out with friends, playing good shows, getting stuff done, hanging out in the sun.
Highlights: Spending time in Renton with my sister and her three amazing children. Actually finding the motivation to do some zine writing. Hanging out with a few new friends on rooftops and in parks and watching the sun rise. Riding my bike all day every day and whenever the mood strikes me. Building raised bed garden boxes with Becky. Going nude swimming with gorgeous canadians and rad friends and trespassing on bourgeois docks. Playing two fun shows with friends' bands (Vitamin Piss, Cut Loose, Alaskas). Seeing a secret generator-punk show at the arboretum. Managing to not be deeply affected by terrible situations and accepting them for their worth. Seeing shooting stars on a rooftop, then later in the week seeing a lightning storm at 4 in the morning. Playing D&D and eating healthy snacks all night on Thursday. Talking to Josh Harper on the phone and talking about how he's playing D&D now too. Feeling like SeattleDIY is getting shit done and getting to a somewhat functional level of organization.
This coming week should be good too. I have a lot of work to do on The Guide To Seattle and the Guide To Putting Shit On before the pdx zine symposium (which I sadly won't be able to go to), and a lot of stuff to do to coordinate volunteers for Carousel Festival. Plus on top of that, there's generally a lot of stuff going on that I'm going to do my best to be a part of. But despite all this I'm still really sad about the recent collapse of a relationship with a woman I was deeply in love with. It casts a slight shadow over all this amazing stuff.
Oh, messy life. All the good and all the bad - it's all important and I'm glad that this is the hand that's been dealt.
