Hope Springs

[mood| blah]

Rules:
1. Emphasize all lines that apply to you.
2. Tag five more people after you finish, complete with links to their sites.
3. Let the person you've tagged KNOW that they've been tagged, for Pete's sake. FREE FOR ALL.

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[mood| hopeful]

NOT the best of days for me. It must be nearing my Time of Scarlet.

I'm irritable, homicidal/murderous, have just as big an appetite, am moody as hell, horrifically bloated (or at least feel like it), bitchy, snappish: you name it. I'm also restless, not knowing quite what it is I want to do, and ready to dispute anyone who tells me what to do. What in holy hell..! Gah!

So there's work, and assignements that need to be done, books needing to be read, but of course I'm halfheartedly doing them, and now of course doing something completely irrelevant, like this entry. Going to parlor yesterday and having my nails done (which are coquettishly winking up at me) should have helped...but it still didn't. =(

Hmm. I think I'll try to deflect it with something my aunt Oa challenged me to do, years ago, in the midst of my (then) teen angst:

10 Things I Hate and Love About Myself*:

*I couldn't think up 5 I like about myself before, but now...my, things do change! :D

Hate:
-my full figure (esp. the hips!)
-my procrastinating nature/complacency
-my dependence on others (driver..)
-my tendence to hyperventilate
-my allergic reactions (sinusitis, asthma)
-my sense of responsibility
-my habitualness and apprehension when this is disrupted
-my (overly) sense of propriety
-my over-sensitivity to what others may think
-my aimlessness

Love:
-my luminous(?) eyes
-my calm nature
-my vegetarianism/compassion/sense of eco-harmony
-my passion
-my voice
-my ready smile
-my charm (if I want to use it)
-my (usual) ready wit
-my refinement
-my flexibility

OK, so it helped....but I still don't want to work! Or go to the gym later? Or yoga? Ackkkkk *grab hair* Massage? Or mall?????? Eeeeek, maybe the mall tomorrow and Sunday. We'll see. But for now, a nap might make all things better.

[mood| accomplished]

I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I wasrdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig torscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr theltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit andlsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl msesand you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae the huuamnmnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe.Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If youcan raed this rpsoet it.

Oh, and my userpic and mood icon are care of girlboheme <3 Hee, went on a complete overhaul. Yey.

[mood| bitchy]

First off, mood theme is courtesy of girlboheme <3

Anyway...

What a way to end a week. =)

Last Friday was Ahma (my paternal Chinese grandmother)'s 71st birthday and the day after her release from the hospital. So cheers for that. During that dinner, Achi Carol also taught me the basics of Sudoku, and yes, it IS fun! *gasp--from non-Math major me!* It was also a hectic day for my stint as grad assistant: besides loads of paperwork, I was made to proctor a class! It was supposedly for a Basic English (non-credit) class, for a test they were to take, but then another teacher called for a sub(stitute), and this time it was for TWO classes, and "Regular" (credit status) English at that. The secretary and I worried and fussed, but finally were able to ask another teacher teaching Basic English, and teaching at a nearby room, to proctor the Basic English class in question, along with hers. Meanwhile, I was to take the Regular English classes. And I did. When I gave them the question, they were absolutely flummoxed, and dismayed. Needless to say, it was vague and sweeping, and VERY LACKING--as lacking as his attendance in class *frowns*. Poor kids. The bisexual in me found one particular girl in the first class attractive: she wasn't va-va-voom, but bookish, in a cute, worried way. [Stop it, Therese] I tried to help them, and be nice and got chalkdust all over my pants from writing and erasing, ick. And while I was proctoring, I was doing paperwork--so exhausting to multi-task x3 But despite this, I saw the kids' personalities shine through most especially. Heh, it must be the extreme stress of [insert teacher's name here]'s test. Oh well. Then they called me MA'AM. O_o What.the.heck. It was freaky, but it felt...exhilarating? At the same time, I began to feel more the heavy responsibility a teacher has over her students. I believe most kids would think being a teacher would mean bossing a class around, but that's only part of the equation: for there needs to be someone to lead for others to follow a certain way. Just the same can be said with students and teacher. However, both are essential, and must work in tandem, for either to flourish. Being a student is much easier than being a teacher--having to [usually] have all the answers, the grand plan, to the destination. But as much as it looks hard, and very unrewarding, what with the pittance of a salary, and demanding parents who think their kids are always on the right, or gossip-spreading students, and so on, I still would want to teach at some point in my life.

Then yesterday was GREAT: Had yoga in the morning--Christina taught, though I was disappointed my friend Tina wasn't there. However, I chatted up with someone new, called Vicky. She looks like she's in ad(vertising), but as much as she looks like the type A go-getter ad exec, she seems nice. Yoga boy wasn't there, too, but that didn't deter me from having a great practice! :D They're having a sale, too, so I'm thinking of buying a bigger class-card...which means not spending on anything else UNLESS absolutely needed :3 We'll see. Then there's the POWERPLANT VINTAGE BAZAAR, ongoing 'til today, that I went to. And I got kitschy stuff: gold Buddha bead-necklace (what my Dad calls my Shaolin necklace) metallic beady layering necklace, huge white-and-gold wooden cuff-bracelet, and a new transform-this-into-a-million-things hair/neck thing for BOTH heat and cold called Schizo Gear. Heh, the kikay in me clamored to be heard! Good thing Sayee told Ahma to give me PhP1k for "taking care of Ahma--managing everything," else my wallet would be crying now! xP Of course, monetary gain wasn't on the agenda, something my abuela knows and credits me for, and to which my Mom says, "You're a good kid." But hey, I'm not complaining. =D Incidentally, my aunt was a concessionaire in the bazaar, and I used her bag that day, so I was her "model," if even for a few hours, haha. And I think that she gave me that bag more than paid off with my "modeling:" She told my Mom so many people went to her booth to look for a similar bag xP Went with Mom and Dad to the factory to hear mass with them for a "lazier" Sunday, then after dinner, Mom and I watched The Witches of Eastwick. Of course, before dinner, Dad, being hungry and overstressed, was carping about EVERYTHING. Mom was getting pissed, and telling me so, but I'm pretty used to it. I just don't like it when he affects other people, blaming them, and so on--something he often does to me, causing me to break down into tears from all the negativity. But I was lucky: he didn't this time.

Today, so we thought, I mean, with mass out of the way, and nothing pressing to go to, it'd be more relaxing for Dad. Wrong: Angkong (my paternal grandfather) called early to inform Dad that Ahma's wound was bleeding! After a hasty breakfast, he rushed her to the ER. It turns out it was fat and blood oozing out (eew). Still: she goes up and down the stairs, despite having been newly-operated on, which she shouldn't do! So she caused all this on herself! *frowns, tosses head* Tsk, tsk. I wish she'd stay put, at least until she heals, not stretching herself! Now I bet she doesn't follow her soft diet. Aaaaargh. Whywhywhy!!!!!! BUT it was a shallow wound, so that was a relief. Afterwards, Mom, Dad, Mama Cez (my maternal, mestiza abuela) went to the El Cirkulo building along PasayArnaiz Road, to find it closed. However, there was this other restaurant called Tsukiji. And ohmyGOD, it serves VERY good Japanese food. I had all kinds of vegetable goodness, PLUS a green tea/redbean dessert afterwards enough that had me ready to die afterwards, swear to God. It was that good. PLUS we didn't smell (like one usually would after eating Japonais). I so want to go back. Mmm-mm-MMM.

Now, I'm readying to go stay with my grandfolks for some time, and this includes one of our helpers to keep me company. Then she half-protested, muttering "diet." Honest to GOD, I hate that word. I associate it with conscious-starvation, acquiesced-deprivation, with unreal body-images, hasty, short-term, unrealistic goals, and so on. Needless to say, I don't believe in it, and am totally against such a mindset. Why deprive yourself of what you want when you don't have to? That's just her excuse to not go, and stay with the other helpers here, just as that though she knows how to cook, when our cook is on leave for the day, she just cooks instant noodles for lunch(!empty calories, chemicals=bad!) because she doesn't want to be bothered to cook. What.the.hell. What about nutrition, sustenance, TASTE!?!?!?!?! But nope. She hides behind the flimsy excuse/term of "diet." So now, while I'm in school, I devised for her to go home so she doesn't have to "diet." Wow, taslk about spoiled: the boss is making concessions for the helper?! Along the same vein, it's my abuela's birthday on the 28th, so our cook said, "So I don't need to cook for you anymore?" I said, yeah, but what about Sunday? And she replied, "Don't they have food over at your grandfolks'?" to which I replied that they just eat junk food. [Our helpers also see junk food as "diet" food, when it's actually the reverse, to nutrition-conscious folk like I know.] Then she said, "Well maybe you can just diet like them." And I affrontedly, crossly said NO! Again they just use it as an excuse, this time to appeal to my aesthetic self: for me to perhaps look better if I were slimmer, because I'll (a) eat less food, so (b) she'll cook less. But no, no, NO. I won't. Sure I'm not thin, but I don't think I'm totally fat. And it can bother me sometimes, but I won't "diet" for it. And it's not like they can't cook/prepare my food, which incidentally is easy-peasy to prepare [vegetables?!]; they're just lazy to. They're not doing much anything else. So why the hell NOT?! Dammit. My apologies for showing the bratty side of me that demands quality. But yes, I demand it. And quality=no diet, no shortcuts, no deprivation. Diet=shortchanging yourself on LIFE. HELLO: Diet=a short-term stop-gap. I believe in long-term, I believe in conscious choices [hence my vegetarianism: for my health, the animals and the environment]: choices I can CELEBRATE. And a diet just isn't it. Besides, I believe in living my life the way I want it, so there.

Now, I'm typing this from my Firefox browser, which I junked Apple's Safari for, and what the heck, it's slow: not only slow, but on-again-off-again connection! WTF. I think there's something wrong with PLDT DSL. And it's driving me batty.I moved closer to my DSL source, and it's working fine, actually WAY better than Safari. So I'm glad I'm a (Mozilla) Firefox user now! No regrets...yet xD

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[mood| excited]

Mood and userpic courtesy of girlboheme, my new idol <3

Apart from eschewing animal flesh (including fish!), I avoid eggs, dairy, leather, silk, fur, HFCS...but not so particular with honey and wool, and sometimes fish sauce, pearls and gelatin (living with omni gourmand parents), though I'm borderline with the latter three, so I'm not vegan...yet.

Apart from dairy cheese promoting cattle murder, et al, I am lactose-intolerant, so I get stomach pains and migraines and gas, to name a few effects.

Being from the Philippines, I thought I'd have to make do with no cheese, and so far, it's been OK.

Then Healthy Options, our local mega-healthfood store brought in Nutritional Yeast, and I was one of those who placed in an order. I was given a lax recipe of soymilk+mustard+margarine+nutritional yeast by erinthrasher. Holy cow (pardon the phrase), it was orgasmic. I next tried it with fried tofu and Heinz Tabasco Ketchup, and it tasted like eggs without the murder. Mom looked at my "cheese sauce" with interest, and when she found out what it was, and that it was nutritious (um, "nutritional yeast" must be called that for something?)--especially high in B12, she was all for it. I mean, the recipes one can use with it are endless! A next one to try would be steamed broccoli and nutritional yeast. As she said, "So we're not limited to tofu anymore!" Um, I never was, Mom, but coming from an omni...fine. xP

Thus my first foray (and hopefully not my last) into Nutritional Yeast Heaven.

Yey!

[mood| pensive]

Mood (and userpic) courtesy of girlboheme.

In light of the recent bomb threat in the UK, airlines the world over have tightened security measures. United Airlines has issued the new measures here.

Yes, aircraft passengers can no longer bring cologne, alcohol, even toothpaste and lip balm, for crying out loud. I heard there was one particularly stringent occasion when a book wasn't allowed. Now I hear carry-on luggage might not be allowed, as well. What about passenger rights--people who pay to ride, mind you? What if our teeth form cavities, or our lips crack from the cold, stale air? The consequences of those mayhem-lovers go on and on. Admittedly, these airline measures are safety precautions for our betterment. But in protecting us, they are stifling us more.

It seems to me that in causing these measures to be effected against us civilians, these mayhem-loving terrorists are now using us as their weapons against the dominant institution/s, in this case, the First World countries, more specifically the US. It's sort of becoming an attempt at parricide, brother against brother, only different ideologies form a gulf between them, between us and the radicals.

I can't help but link this to the war in Iraq. And this tension now sort of feels like a prequel, a last step before Cambodia in the throes of Pol Pot's regime, or because of this seeming stand-off, the Vietnam War (with the US, which though the latter had superior fire-power and wealth, the former won) The US has no proof that the Iraq war should continue. Perhaps this is the bone of contention the fundamentalists want to settle [with the US]. For innocent lives are being continually lost--as in the Lebanese-Israeli war right now, as well. So they fight back, using innocent civilians, as well, thus my quasi-analogizing this to the Pol Pot regime.

In the meantime, it is us civilians who suffer, who bear the brunt of their actions--of both opposing sides. Then again, that's why it's a matter of concern: because many are affected. And that's how it always seems to be. Now I feel it to be a chicken-and-egg argument: this will never end, because this already seems to be part of the human psyche.

Nevertheless, I do wish it'd stop. In spite of this seeming futility, I still believe in hope--for a better tomorrow, for a change in psyche, of not seeing people as objects/pawns--the more, the merrier, but instead see them as different and unique individuals.

How I wish that morrow would come in my lifetime.

[mood| complacent]

Mood courtesy of girlboheme

Whatta day. So last Friday, after GA (grad assistant) work and crammed research, then a horrific two-hour traffic wait, preventing me from attending Bikram yoga, over the (hospital) telephone, Angkong finally allowed to have the operation done to Amah, after realizing that YES, the stones will return to block more ducts, and YES, next time can be even WORSE. After persuading him, and talking to the doctor, and asking for Diko (Auntie Carmen, his sister)'s support, he caved, as Mims liked to say. All this time, I was also corresponding with Sir Jonathan as my number was still with him and he needed me to contact the others that he would be absent the next day, though the deadline for the paper was still tomorrow. So I complied, texting the others--or at least those whose numbers I knew! Then I sped through the pre-operation process, arranging the formalities with the nurses, the cashier, the interns, the chief doctor, and relaying all this to my folks through my low-batt mobile, because the hospital phone was acting up. Then Diko and Achi Carol came, took me out for dinner at Pho Hoa (which has a nice revamped menu, by the way!) and brought me home--at 11:30, leaving me with little, precious time to do my various requirements. I tried...'til about 4:40, upon which I promptly succumbed to slumber, promising to wake at 5. Hah. Like that ever happened: I woke at 7:30!!!! Eeeek! But I was too tired to rush. So I left at around 9, being too late for Danny's class, choosing to cut (as I heard he was in a nasty mood--I have to apologize to him on Monday for doing this! :-s), instead getting my requested articles from the microform area, and getting ready for my Sidney presentation. The presentation....floundered, or maybe (hopefully?) not: Perhaps Dr. Lu was just really preoccupied. Who wouldn't be: her son is convalescing in UST! Then rushed to do Jonathan's paper, and squeezed a small lunch-snack in between. By the time I was done--5 pm--I was utterly drained. I then called the hospital to check on Amah, if she had already returned from the operation slated at 2 pm today, but my cousin Marco told me she's still in the Recovery Room. When Remus fetched me at 6, I thought to comfort myself with finishing the NBS coupons Mom gave me that were set to expire by Sept.15. And hey: NBS is having a SALE! 'Til the end of the month! Powerbooks too! But anyway. After some tired scrounging, I found Pullman's HDM Book 3--selling at PhP 392. I had PhP's 330 worth of coupons, so I only shelled out PhP 62! On to Starbucks, and hey, luckylucky: they had one last PINK liter-tumbler--the solution to my water shortage, I hope, and my current one to be set up as a "contingency." By the time all this was done, I was just floating. 'Tis a good thing I just rode and slept. When I got home, I could barely see straight: no cardio tonight, I guess. Slept 'til dinnertime (about near midnight), and caught up with my folks, which is almost always nice. But then, hehe, I was wide awake 'til 7 am, writing and surfing on the "Innernets," as Dubya calls it ;)

I'm hoping to go to this place after grad school, referred by a NYT article on Ayurveda: They offer Hatha Yoga and Ayurveda classes!
Then there's a place to be a volunteer and be close to animals, and not WWF, which promotes animal testing! :-s

As a consumer, I am currently going nuts over clothes from Lululemon (usually for yoga, hehe). Eeek. I can't wait for the next shipment to arrive at Aura, the store they sell to here! Can't wait can't wait!:
-Curved Relaxed Short
-Reverse Groove Short
-Shimmy VBT
-Curved Rib Lulu Pant
-Globe Trot Jacket
-Baja Shape Jacket

Hopefully Aura will come out with them!!!!!

AND

I'm thinking of switching from Nokia to Motorola. Looking at the Motorola Maxx.

Or should I just stay and go user-friendly Nokia, but heavy on $$$ and save for the Nokia N71?

Sigh; I'll wait 'til December, or try to. Perhaps things will be clearer by then (and I'll have more $$$$ also, I hope!)

Hmm. I like my newfound hairstyle of pigtails: my hair's neater, and it still leaves my scalp flat for Savasana and sit-up poses in (Bikram) yoga--though it does make me more like a kid than I already do! ;) I also like going around bra-less at home, being quite the liberating experience (envies flat-chested girls who can go out bra-less). But my tummy's all fat and gross just now: I'm hoping it's only PMS :(

Okay okay: Just heard LUSH has a buy one take one promo. And I need my fresh soap, hopefully with exfoliant & moisturizing properties! I'll be giving that a look later while Mom goes gaga over Prada and whatnot, after we visit Amah in the hospital. Hopefully, she's better. Yey. :)

First off, birthday greetings to my momma and to agent_0.
Belated birthday greetings to pink_pinkies (yesterday)

Went with my lola around Powerplant yesterday. I like Powerplant the most because almost everything I need/like is there, and it's not wall-to-wall people, it's pretty organized...yeah. So that was fun. Yey. Belated birthday gift was a Yogitoes mat. Luffluff. Then went to the Independent Lifestyle section....eeeeek: clothesclothesshoesclothesbagsclothesclothesclothes!!!!!!!!! They even had a clothing line for DOGS! I got these chiffon sandals...you slip a swatch of chiffon along these loops on the sole of the sandal, and PRESTO, sandals! Sooooo cute. And at PhP450, not bad. Then there was this made-to-order clothes shop...and I liked one dress.....gah. We'll see what my Mum will say. It's 4.5 k, after all, and I need that for yoga, too. And until I finish Community Service, I won't get cleared; until I get cleared, I won't get my transcript; until I get I transcript, I won't be able to process my employment application as the English Dept's Grad Assistant, and until I process my employment application, I won't.get.paid. Ackackack. Oh well, at least we ended with gelato from Pazzo (after I ran groceery errands for my Mum--where I found SILK CHOCOLATE ON SALE!) The best thing: my gelato was soy-based! The cows are happy, and I'm happy, so it's all good. :D

Saturday night found me with my lola (again) at a concert in St. Scholastica of Jean Sibelius' works, as played by the Manila Symphony Orchestra and Justin Texon, the latter having arrived from Berlin (and an old student of my lolo). 'Tis a pity Joanna (my aunt-in-law and voice teacher) couldn't make it. :( And Sr. Placid still introduces me to the other OSB nuns as the PREDIS baby; anooooobbbaaaaaaa XD

So there's my weekend. Now to work on Sidney presentation, Eagleton paper, paper on the link between "Xoce" and "Doreen," and the Germinal paper, then squeezing yoga in as much as I can, everyday. Speaking of yoga...pati ba naman diyan, may politika. Ah well; bahala. Musn't waste time, now.

Your True Birth Month Is March

Moody Secretive Revengeful Trustworthy Affectionate Loves traveling Loves attention Shy and reserved Musically talented Loves home decor Not easily angered Sensitive to others Loves special things Attractive personality Loves to serve others Loves peace and serenity Observant and assess others Loves to dream and fantasize Appreciative and returns kindness Hasty decisions in choosing partners Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic

[mood| giggly]

Mood courtesy of girlboheme.

And from slave2shinigami:

<td align="center"> Therese --
[adjective]:

Insatiable to the point of crazy

'How will you be defined in the sexual dictionary?' at QuizUniverse.com</td>

You Are a Centaur

In general, you are a very cautious and reserved person. However, you are also warm hearted, and you enjoy helping others in practical ways. You are a great teacher, and you are really good at helping people get their lives in order. You are very intuitive, and you go with your gut. You make good decisions easily.

Your Rising Sign is Pisces

Dreaming and introspective, you're often lost in your thoughts. Which is okay by you... you're inner world is pretty darn awesome. And while you are inwardly confident, sometimes you seem a bit unsure. People often handle you more delicately than they need to. You love luxury, and even if you're a bit broke, you want things to look "rich." Mysterious and demure, you keep secrets about yourself to remain an enigma.

Really, how correct is this? And dapat over a 6-month period pa ata naman eh.

You Are 72% Bipolar

You're more than moody - you're a bit unstable. If your mood swings are effecting your life, you may need to seek help.

THE GREATEST* ADVICE
(*well maybe not the greatest I think, but great nonetheless!--goldendarkness)

Don't date because you are desperate.
Don't marry because you are miserable.
Don't have kids because you think your genes are superior.
Don't philander because you think you are irresistible.

Don't associate with people you can't trust.
Don't cheat. Don't lie. Don't pretend.
Don't dictate because you are smarter.
Don't demand because you are stronger.

Don't sleep around because you think you are old enough and know better.
Don't hurt your kids because loving them is harder.
Don't sell yourself, your family, or your ideals. Don't stagnate!

Don't regress.
Don't live in the past. Time can't bring anything or anyone back.
Don't put your life on hold for possibly Mr./Ms. Right.
Don't throw your life away on absolutely Mr./Ms. Wrong because your
biological clock is ticking.

Learn a new skill.
Find a new friend.
Start a new career.
Sometimes, there is no race to be won.
Only a price to be paid for some of life's more hasty decisions.

To terminate your loneliness, reach out to the homeless.
To feed your nurturing instincts, care for the needy.
To fulfill your parenting fantasies, get a puppy.
Don't bring another life into this world for all the wrong reasons.

To make yourself happy, pursue your passions and be the best of what you can be.
Simplify your life. Take away the clutter.
Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends, nasty habits, and
dangerous liaisons.
Don't abandon your responsibilities but don't overdose on duty.

Don't live life recklessly without thought and feeling for your family.
Be true to yourself.
Don't commit when you are not ready.
Don't keep others waiting needlessly.

Go on that trip. Don't postpone it.
Say those words. Don't let the moment pass.
Do what you have to, even at society's scorn.

Write poetry.
Love deeply.
Walk barefoot.
Dance with wild abandon.
Cry at the movies.

Take care of yourself. Don't wait for someone to take care of you.
You light up your life.
You drive yourself to your destination.
No one completes you - except YOU.

It isn't true that life does not get easier with age. It only gets
more challenging.
Don't be afraid. Don't lose your capacity to love.
Pursue your passions.

Live your dreams.
Don't lose faith in God.
Don't grow old. Just grow YOU!

When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your
life that you'll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why
the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. Relationships
take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is T-I-M-E
because the essence of love is not what we think or do or provide for
others, but how much we give of ourselves.

-Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life