Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise

1. If you could suddenly speak one language fluently (that you don't currently speak) what would it be? Icelandic, maybe
2. If you were to suggest a foreign film, that you really enjoyed, what one would you suggest? Life is Beautiful
3. If you had to call another country home (other than the one you currently live in) what one would you choose? Switzerland, maybe
4. If you went out to buy an import music CD, what one would you buy? Not sure..
5. If you were to chose an ethnic dinner, what would it be? Depends on my mood..some days I'll crave Mexican, others Thai, etc

I've been watching videos of James Ortiz, and I found one from 10 years ago (he was in the play The Woodsman, which I tried watching a little of but it was very..odd O_o), and started melting over his hair LOL

Fabulous. 😍😍 He seems like such a cool person! I especially love his Cameo videos, you can really tell he cares about his fans! I'm still honored he did a video for me :D (yep, crushing on him hard now LOL)

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Hooray, I finally was able to watch James Ortiz's video (mom said it was "safe" when she watched it haha)! Warmth came over me when he said "hi Heather!" hehe. He said my message (I said his performance of Rocky touched me deeply. I only had like 500 characters, I wanted to write more) was very sweet, aww. I also asked what his favorite scene to film was, and he said it was one that didn't even make the final cut! He and Grace were talking about dreams, which Rocky didn't understand, so they had a long, beautiful conversation about it. When I first watched the video, I was disappointed (I was still panicked at what he might say to me lol), because in other videos he talked like Rocky, wishing other people "happy birthday" and things like that. I watched it again today, and had a completely different reaction! He took his time explaining the scene, and didn't just say a couple words and be like "ok bye!" Yesterday I heard him say something about a good day, and today I heard "that's my fun fact, Heather, and I hope you have a really great day!" Just the fact that he said my name again in that tone of voice, like I mattered to him, even for just a couple minutes. I can't believe I missed that yesterday! Of course he ended with "fist my bump!," which I did back on the screen lol. Needless to say, I am NOT disappointed anymore haha (I'm glad I gave it another chance!). He seems like such a lovely person <3

One of my Facebook friends messaged me yesterday saying he was watching Project Hail Mary for the first time, and throughout the movie he messaged me ("Rocky now has a voice and I love him so much!" "Words of encouragement!" "I can 1000% see why you love this movie so much!) AND on the same day my friend who rides the bus with me (she works next door to the bookstore) texted me that she watched it and also loved it. I texted back "now I can talk like Rocky without you thinking I'm crazy, question? Amaze!," and she sent me thumbs up and thumbs down haha. We're going to have fun the next time we ride the bus together. :D There really is something special about the movie..it's so hopeful and real (using a puppet, actual set pieces, etc) and beautiful. Ryan and James's actual friendship shined through in the movie too..NO one else could have played their characters better than they did! Truly amaze! <3 (I still miss seeing it at the theater though *sniff*)

Yesterday my parents' neighbors were shooting off fireworks, the loudest ones they could find it seemed like, right outside my bedroom window. It was like 12:30 and I was trying to finish my book and they were still shooting them off! Mom said they were still doing it at 3:30 in the morning! That's not very nice! Some people just don't have consideration for others, apparently..

Yesterday a TORNADO touched down near Cantwell (a couple hours south of Fairbanks). That one was the 7th on record for Alaska. Great, not even Alaska is safe, question?! *shivers* Here's a pic of it:

I guess it's good there's a lot of "nothing" in Alaska haha. Still a little alarming though O_o

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1. What is your biggest waste of time in your home? Going online, reading, playing with Curti..
2. When at work, what is the activity that you find wastes the most time? Talking to people about books and random other things lol
3. When getting busy with a date or significant other, what ritual could you do without? I don't have one of those
4. What is the biggest waste of time on the Internet? YouTube, Facebook, etc
5. What do you do at a restaurant to waste time when waiting for your meal? Get an appetizer, talk to the people I'm with, maybe use my phone if everyone else is using theirs..

The bookstore is closed tomorrow for the 4th of July, so I get a three-day weekend! I've been tired and not liking how hot it gets in the building, so a break is definitely needed! Maybe I'll eventually be brave enough to watch James Ortiz's video..I'm scared I'll be disappointed! Maybe I'll have mom watch it first and tell me if it's good lol. I think it's really cool he grew up in Richardson, Texas, a suburb of Dallas like Flower Mound! Makes me wonder if I ever met him, but probably not lol

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A book about women astronauts: The Calculating Stars by Mary Robinette Kowal (June 1-7). Space science is so hard to understand O_o

A book with a trans or nonbinary protagonist: The Affair of the Mysterious Letter by Alexis Hall (June 7-14). Sooo boringgg..the character would be like "she said something unfit to print, I don't want to damage the readers' delicate sensibilities." Ugh

A book about teen angst: My Friends by Fredrik Backman (June 14-20). Angst everywhere! Backman has such an unusual way of writing..

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Wow..that's my worst reading month in a long time. O_o I guess I keep reading long ones haha

Well, I have a problem..James Ortiz indeed sent me a personalized video...but I'm too scared to watch it! I'm worried I'll be disappointed, he thought I was dumb, it's not a sincere message since I had to pay for it, etc. Literally every one of his 300+ reviews has five stars, and in the still image on my video, he's smiling, but I can't stop worrying! Maybe one day..

I've been watching behind the scenes and interviews from Project Hail Mary..Ryan Gosling and James Ortiz were alone (except for the filmmakers/puppeteers, etc) for a lot of the time on set, so they would talk a lot and rehearse together. James never wanted Ryan to feel alone, so when Rocky was behind glass, they both had earphones so they could talk to each other. They bonded deeply, and you can definitely tell when watching the movie. When Grace is showing Rocky images from Earth, he looks SO happy, which I'm sure is genuine. A lot of their lines they made up on the spot! Every new thing I learn about the movie makes me love it even more..I knew it was special from the first day I watched it..they're not necessarily acting, it's genuine friendship in real life too. <3 Both Ryan and James are just effortlessly cool people haha. It looked tedious doing puppetry for Rocky, but it definitely paid off! The original plan was to have someone talk over James's Rocky lines, but the directors thought he was perfect, and I so agree! James is definitely Rocky in human form..he even fidgets with his hands like Rocky! James said he felt like 100% of himself on the PHM set..so cool!!

27. What are three things from this past month that have made you cry? *shrugs*

28. What are three things from this past month that have made you laugh? James doing his Rocky voice on Cameo (I can watch everyone's but my video LOL), Curti being funny, fun with coworkers

29. How are you feeling today? I was very tired and eventually got a migraine..so much fun :P

30. What is your favorite thing about winter/summer right now? When it cools off enough to sleep well, not taking five minutes to bundle up to go outside haha, pretty flowers, etc

July 1: Describe a moment from today that you want to remember always. Curti being happy when I came home from work..he's so cute hehe

1. What do you do for stress relief? Just try to get through it, maybe eat or take a nap
2. What do you do to get out of moodiness? Also take a nap or eat haha, or force myself to do something I might like
3. How do you get through a day while sleep-deprived? I've had lots of practice with this on overnight flights from Alaska..you get groggy when the plane lands, still feel "meh" on the next flight, and since there's usually a long drive from the airport, get something to eat to stay awake..eventually you get past the exhaustion and just go about the day. I still feel hungover from traveling for a day or two after that..not super fun, but I can do it lol
4. How do you calm down when angry or anxious? Just..wait for time to pass. I might curl up under a weighted blanket or take Clonazepam if I can't calm down. I pretty much always have some anxiety with me throughout the day, but that comes with being autistic :P
5. How do you get your focus when you’re having difficulty focusing? It can definitely be hard! I'll be like "ok, stop thinking about Project Hail Mary/curtains/the embarrassing moment from five minutes ago" haha. It's like I have to shove the thoughts away to focus lol

My coworker and I watched Project Hail Mary on Monday (she loved it, of course lol) and even though I've seen it a ridiculous number of times, there were STILL details I'd never noticed before! One was when Rocky and Grace meet for the second time..it was always too dark to tell before, but Rocky was walking on the ceiling at first! I always thought it was weird that Grace obviously saw Rocky but I could never tell where he was! Maybe my computer screen was brighter than others lol. There was also a Japanese flag on the outside of the Hail Mary. So many great details in the movie!!

There's this website called Cameo, where you can get personalized videos from famous people (you have to pay, of course :P). Yesterday someone on the Project Hail Mary Facebook group requested a video from James Ortiz (the main puppeteer and voice of Rocky), and he said hello to all of us in the group, and said Rocky would break down the "door" of the Facebook group, and then ended the video talking in Rocky's voice, which had me DYING (it made me happy all day today haha). Instant crush activated!! How cool is his hair, question??

He just seems like a cool guy too! I miiight have requested a personal video for myself..he's the heart and soul of Rocky, no way I was passing up that opportunity! It would be SO cool if he answered :D

The bookstore has been having awesome register days, today it was over $1200, and we're getting $800s too. After the awfulness of last summer, I'll never take that for granted again! Danae stopped the store from dying, I'm pretty sure we were right on the edge. Behind the building are cottonwood trees, which have been dumping MASSIVE amounts of cotton, so much that it looks like it's snowing and it's getting everywhere in the bookstore! I've never seen this much cotton before..we'll find it in random places throughout the winter probably LOL

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1. What is place you have visited, or want to visit, that starts with D? I have visited Dallas, Texas
2. What is a food that you like, or don't like, that starts with R? I like rice and I don't like raisins
3. Own anything that starts with the letter M? A Mac computer, maps of different places, etc
4. Know anyone whose name (first, middle, or last) that starts with N? Yeah, various people, like Jo's last name, and probably others I can't think of right now lol
5. Favorite movie, book, TV show, or song whose title starts with T? "Time Go Fishing" from Project Hail Mary, The Thursday Murder Club, The Terror, Titanic, etc

I was taking pictures of Curti and got this one accidentally:

Awww. His tongue doesn't seem as rough as other cats' for some reason lol. Like Greyboy, he can open doors now..it the screen door is closed, he'll use his paw to open it some, then stick his head in the opening to make it bigger. He is way too smart :P

Ughh its been way too hot this week..it's been in the 80s today. It makes me tired and migrainey if I don't drink enough water. The Midnight Sun Festival is tomorrow, but it might just be too hot for me. I heard someone on the bus say "I didn't realize I moved to the Death Valley of Alaska!" haha. We are lame with heat..at least if it's cold, you can put on more layers :P

For the first time at work, we get Juneteenth off as a paid holiday! The bookstore will have Tuesday off instead because we already had a planned event for this weekend. My parents' house stays way cooler than my apartment, so I'll enjoy that as much as possible :P

I had lunch with Denise today, which was cool..we might make it a monthly thing. I'm so glad she's much happier now!

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1. What would you do with more physical storage space? Get another bookshelf, and put other random things in it
2. What would you do with more living space? Fill it with books haha
3. Would you rather have more kitchen counter space or kitchen cabinet space? Counter space, I think
4. What would you do with a larger bedroom? Put a bigger, fancier four-poster bed in it haha, and maybe put up more art on the walls
5. What’s taking up too much space in your brain lately? Definitely Project Hail Mary, I can barely think of anything else! It doesn't help that the songs in it get stuck in my head easily lol

The new Executive Director (Myriam) started training this week..she's from Haiti and very nice! Lucie brought her over to the bookstore and Myriam really liked the happy, fun atmosphere, yay! Danae really helped turn things around, before it was oppressive and not fun. Maybe she'll have some cool new ideas for the store too!

Today I was talking to a kid and he asked if I was always smiling, and when I said yes he was like "you don't stop??" and I said "nope!" I was a little uncomfortable, but kids have no filter LOL. Me smiling a lot is just automatic..life is better that way lol

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9. Describe your family's evening routine right now: Eat dinner, go online, take a shower, etc

10. Write down five funny things that your child(ren) or your partner has said recently: I don't have either

11. How are you going with your goals for this year? I'm kinda slow on reading books this year, but every year's different lol

12. What are your favorite items of clothing to wear when it's really cold? Fuzzy socks, a fleece jacket, a qiviut scarf, etc

Happy birthday to me! I can't believe I'm nearing 40. O_o It's been rainy and cool all day, but I definitely prefer that over how hot it's been! The longer I live in Alaska, the less tolerant I get of heat. I went with my family and Danae to Chena's Alaskan Grill, my traditional birthday spot, though they're not quite as good as they used to be. We then went to my parents' house and I opened my gifts..mom outdid herself yet again and made me a curtain-themed book! She is so talented! (I'm probably the only person who has a homemade curtain book LOL.) Danae got me a neck fan for when it's hot at work, and Artemis by Andy Weir..I have read it already, but it was nice of her lol. I got a variety of gift cards (Amazon, Starbucks, Doordash, etc) from my parents, and Ryan and Jo got me a Project Hail Mary keychain and stickers! Ryan also made me a fancy cake with Swiss meringue buttercream frosting and the Hail Mary on top, of course haha (I would have been shocked if it *hadn't* been PHM themed :P). It was super decadent and smooth..my family is so talented lol..definitely spoiled :P

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6. Find out five things about a distant relative of yours: Nah :P

7. Describe your family's morning routine right now: I usually read in bed, then get ready to go to work (or just go online on my days off), feed Curti, then go to work and clean/shelve books

8. Describe your family's afternoon routine right now: I work until 3, then I go home and relax and take a nap. If it's the weekend I'll relax online and do laundry

1. Do you enjoy reading? I love reading, one of the best things ever!
2. What is the first book you remember reading? The Bob Books..I'm reminded of my childhood when I see them at work lol
3. Who is your favourite author? Apsley Cherry-Garrard, Charles Finch, Andy Weir, Becky Chambers, Agatha Christie, etc
4. What is your favourite book? The Worst Journey in the World, Project Hail Mary, And Then There Were None, The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet, etc
5. What is the last book you read and the first you'll read next? I'm currently reading The Calculating Stars and I think the next one will be The Affair of the Mysterious Letter

Yesterday was Project Hail Mary's last day at the theater here (*tear*), and I couldn't resist seeing its last showing, making that my ninth theater viewing! (Mom paid for it as an early birthday gift lol) Such a beautiful movie, other movies just seem fake now haha (Dune 3? Meh :P). Ryan Gosling is such a good actor! My soul will love PHM forever <3

It's been in the 70s this week, which, because of the low sun angle, feels HOT in Alaska. I hate how hot it gets at work and at my apartment..at least one of my meds makes me feel hot super easily, so that doesn't help either. The blue sky and green leaves are nice though!

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A book about college: Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros (May 1-24). A dragon college. This got SPICY haha! I feel like they should make their training less dangerous, a lot of the characters die while still training! I like that the main character has a disability, makes it more interesting to me lol

Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir (May 2-11). Big surprise, I'm sure LOL

I've been having run watching other people's reactions to the movie on YouTube, which can be very entertaining..everyone always loses their minds when watching the "fishing" scene. The book explains things in more detail, which is cool. When Grace compares Rocky to a spider, Rocky says "Good. Proud. I am scary space monster. You are leaky space blob" (because Grace was either crying or drinking a lot of water). He is so snarky and fun LOL

A book with a dad as the primary caregiver: Somewhere Beyond the Sea by T.J. Klune (May 8-29). This month's book club read, the sequel to The House in the Cerulean Sea. It would have been alright had the author not forced his politics on us (ugh), and everyone thought the ending was so lame. The kids were still funny though!

A book told entirely through letters: A Letter to the Luminous Deep by Sylvie Cathrall (May 24-31). Kind of boring, but I'm not a huge fan of epistolary books anyway lol

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Putting out all those DVDs at work paid off, they were the second best selling items on Friday (I haven't seen Saturday's numbers yet). Danae was told me "YOU are the reason this sale has been so successful!" I jokingly went around to my corkers and was like "the success all because of meeee!" :P (Really everyone contributed, but it was cool seeing my hard work pay off lol)

30. How are you feeling today? I was tired, but I had fun playing a computer game too

31. What is your favorite thing about Mondays right now? Reading in bed, getting a vanilla bean frappuccino if I go to the store, etc (it was seeing Project Hail Mary until the theater moved it to 8:55 PM. Whyyy, question?!)

June 1. Describe a moment from today that you want to remember always. I left my raincoat and keys at my parents house, even though my instincts were screaming at me to check where they were. Thankfully mom has an extra key, but I want to remember this so I don't do it again haha