Chipper Satan

as a lover of historical fiction and art about women and horny art and silly art i am so so into this premise. everyone can't stop being like "ohh his is dick made of wood too" it's magic dumbass. i am obsessed with how this sounds like an obscure medieval european folk tale. peter dinklage plays a basketmaker with the power to bring life to inanimate objects for an spinste's sexual pleasure. suspend your disbelief about his cock and have a little fun

and the leading lady is played by a woman whose gay man. perfect movie perhaps

for those who haven't seen the trailer.

#I assume his dick is ribbed for her pleasure and well-lacquered#like yes I assume the wicker guy who is ostentatiously 100% wicker everywhere we can see also has a wicker dick#I also assume a basket-making wizard who can make a whole-ass articulated dude out of wicker in one month#while *also* keeping up with his bill-paying day-job baskets#knows how to make a dick where none of the pokery is anywhere near the jiggery#sorry to everyone who's only seen shitty big-box store baskets that are made out of spite and neoliberalism#his dong is wicker and also perfectly fit for purpose#wicker? I hardly knew her! etc.

beautiful + true tags from @tyrannosaurus-trainwreck

I love it when a classicist has clearly gotten so lost in the BCE sauce that their perception of time has become deeply warped. Case in point: the article I’m currently reading just described the Byzantine era as “a period relatively modern.”

Stop that’s too funny

objectively, they're right

you have to read to your kids you have to read with your kids you have to read in front of your kids you have to take your kids to the library you have to talk about books with your kids you have to let your kids read books that are a little difficult or scary you have to teach your kids to love reading

The Lovers and Death

Rukhana Ingellvar and Emmrich Volkarin

Commission done by Drathe

not naming names but some of you are so creative and talented it's an honor to have you in my phone

tonights gonna feel like a pre-raphaelite idealized reimagining of the medieval world painting

AO3 is actually the perfect example of how not having censorship of any kind actually makes it *much easier* to avoid triggering or disturbing content that you don't want to see.

I almost never stumble into a fic with content that I'm not at all comfortable with, because the lack of censorship means that everybody tags their shit appropriately. It's super easy to read the ingredients on the tin of each fic and decide if it's for me or not. Meanwhile, on other social media websites where posts are getting incorrectly flagged for being NSFW and people are doing shit like censoring the words "death" or "kill," I end up seeing inappropriate or disturbing content all the fucking time, because it's *never* labelled, because people are afraid to label their shit with tags that might get it removed, so there's no way to filter any of it out!

If you are actually someone who really doesn't ever want to see NSFW content then that is completely possible on ao3 because M rated content is allowed on there, so it's all clearly labelled as such. if you have any "disturbing" topics or potential triggers you never ever want to see, it's easy to filter them out because ao3 allows things to be labelled with stuff like "pedophilia" or "dub-con" so everything is CLEARLY LABELLED! Of course there are going to be people who don't tag everything correctly but I've been on there for over a decade and I've hardly ever seen it happen. People take tagging etiquette very seriously, because it benefits everyone.

Remember how in Prohibition they banned all alcohol of any kind and so alcohol still existed in America but the production went underground and since none of the distilleries were being regulated, a lot of people ended up getting sick because there was all sorts of who knows what kind of toxic shit in their drinks? And then when America re-legalized alcohol, they were able to once again regulate the production of it and literally all alcoholic drinks became safer as a result? And instead of being sold moonshine in an unlabeled mason jar, now all alcoholic drinks have to have very specific information listed on them like alcohol content, ingredients, and allergen risks, so that people know exactly what they're putting in their bodies? Yeah this is a bit like that.

a tiny ceramic sphinx with equally tiny riddles (sold)!

She's being so big and brave.

The long awaited sequel.

me, who is chroncially ill with multiple don’tfeelgood Conditions: I just don’t feel good and I don’t know why

me, who has chronic pain and multiple irreversibleouch Conditions: I am in so much pain today and I don’t know why

I love environmental storytelling

Its fucking hieroglyphs with you people

Can't just leave this in the comments

Feeling torn about tumblr flagging this as mature content.

It literally is just images of someone’s hands, like wtf tumblr?

But also, I kinda get it because I too get hot and bothered looking at Emmrich’s hands.

this redditor has the fucking battle royale of invasive plants (in the US) happening in their yard jesus christ. sentences of hate and destruction

The funniest thing about Dorian Pavus is that he’s a very emotionally well rounded person with well placed empathy who knows when to apologize and look at things from a different angle, which makes him the straight man in most situations, despite the Time Travelling Alcoholic Necromancer Genius from Magic Racism Land part of his character.

I miss my wife.

(Fictional women from games I don't have the energy to play)