Rhiannon's El-Jay

What has been going down chronologically (more or less) in the last 7ish months, short short form:

December:
- Divorced, got sick, quit my job, moved back to Canada.
- Moved in with family in the basement.
- Took the holidays easy and caught up with family.

January:
- Mental and physical recuperation.
- Went on a quasi-date that went extremely well.
- Kept going on dates.
- Explored the city a little, and re-adjusted to Canada.

February
- Job hunted but came up with nothing.
- Had more dates.
- Met new people.
- Re-discovered Edmonton as an adult.

March
- Job hunted and still nothing but dead interviews.
- Had many more dates.
- Met even more people.
- Stressed terribly over money and future prospects.

April
- Did a temp stint for tax season and stopped stressing about the money.
- A few more dates, though barely got a chance to see the guy.
- Met lots more people.
- Stopped feeling culture shocked on most days.

May
- Finished my temp assignment.
- Spent 2 weeks in Cold Lake visiting the guy and his family.
- Went from casual dating to an actual relationship at some undetermined point.
- Interviewed for another job, landed it.

June
- Visited Cold Lake for another week before my job started.
- Began my first ever salaried permanent position.
- Did a Motorcycle Safety Course.
- Got into the groove of things a little better.

July
- Continued working at the position.
- Continued going on dates.
- Bought a motherfucking motorcycle, no lie.
- Practiced my riding and spent a lot of time with the boy.



August
- Have a wedding to go to in Saskatchewan.
- Have to get my motorcycle license.
- Have to keep working hard and getting better at my job.
- The boyfriend will be moving back to Edmonton this month, so have to keep my excitement contained.

That's about the basics of it. Life is pretty good as it stands.

From the Easter rats!







They'll be 1 on Saturday.

As some workplaces like to do, mine was holding a blood donation drive throughout the day. The blood mobile arrived early in the morning and would be there throughout the afternoon. This seemed like an excellent thing to do, but we were anticipating heavy workloads and it was unlikely I'd have time to break free and become a blood hero.

As fate had it, the work stork brought next to no work babies for me to care for. I was anticipating an octomom's workload delivered and got a well-fed python--really nothing for me to do but watch and poke at it very rarely. Looking at the clock I saw I'd run out of things to do around 1 PM (an abnormally early time) and decided I'd venture forward to the blood mobile to do my part to keep bleeding humans and vampires alike in as much blood as they needed.

My walk to the blood mobile was uneventful. It was hard spotting it from where I first left the building, obscured among the sea of oversized pickup trucks with pristine white paint, and the odd fully-tinted SUV. I did catch the very top of it in my sight and walked toward it. The day was sunny and calm, with warmth from the sun and a chill from the gentle mountain breeze. An idyllic day in early Spring. I saw several people climbing into the blood mobile and hoped my wait wouldn't be too long.

Getting inside that behemoth was an event. Hot, cramped, a slight odor of medical supplies. Already it has made me feel uneasy. I get a clipboard and fill out the paperwork as requested and wait on a sticky little bench near the entrance. The place is slightly claustrophobic with the number of people inside. Well, more than slightly. I'm already questioning my choice about wasting my lunch hour on this endeavor, but it's for the greater good and sometimes you have to suck it up.

I was asked into one of the tiny little interview rooms after my paperwork was completed. It was uncomfortably warm inside of that tiny room. The air conditioner was struggling to keep it at only that amount of heat. A few questions came up, and I was given a little pamphlet to go over. Blah blah blood is good, people need blood, hoof and mouth disease, you're giving the gift of life. Yeah, sure. The helpful fellow interviewing me then tells me he's going to just prick my finger so we can get the blood tested and me approved for donating. That's fine, I'm sure.

There are things to note about myself and needles: I'm no fan. Other than the odd heroin addict or diabetic, I don't think anyone ever starts to like needles, and in their cases they're out of necessity. There may be the odd masochist who likes flaps of skin skewered on a rod, but that's neither here nor there. Needles were much more foe than friend. I've learned to not watch them and to pretend it's not happening but they still just sit so very poorly with me. I've never had serious issues with them in my life though they still evoke a reaction of dread.

Anyway, I look away as the fellow taps my finger of its most precious resource and fills a small vial. It didn't hurt, it wasn't bad. I feel a bit proud of myself for it. There's a fair amount of blood in that vial was the thought I had while he bandaged my fingertip. The questioning continues for a moment, and then things aren't right. They're really not right.

My brain slows. My vision starts getting off. You know television static, on the old black and white sets? All that flickering white and greys, static noise, nothing decipherable. That was quickly becoming my sensory reality, though with a slightly more pleasant yellow and violet hue. I could barely hear anything and struggled to communicate that I felt very unwell. My words fell short of anything coherent as I slumped in the chair. It's really quite scary to feel the world fading from you in some ghetto bus that taps your blood, away from anyone you know. But that's what happened.

It's really quite embarrassing to pretty much pass out in the questioning leading to blood donation. Why wouldn't it be? That's just not very much fortitude to have such a thing happen. I was herded out of the little room, stumbling and unable to see, and put onto one of the horizontal donation chairs. Ice packs were placed behind my neck and on my chest and I was told not only could I not donate, but I'd be stuck there for a while to recover.

My head pounded, my stomach felt weak as watery gelatin. Still couldn't see more than a staticed haze in front of me. I was given the treats normally offered only to blood heroes--cookies and juice. Grudgingly I forced them down under the watchful eye of the phlebotomist.

Slowly my senses and self-worth recovered. Mr. Phlebotomeister says I need to eat a lot before I try another time. This doesn't happen to too many people, I'm told, but it's still not that abnormal. How many times have men heard that line in the bedroom? It's still disappointment for all parties involved, and a deep sense of shame and inadequacy. Not even making it to the real needle! Just some little pansy finger-pricking thing and I'm out. For shame.

I've now returned from this harrowing journey into self-discovery and deep loathing. I hope none of you need to make the same journey. May all your blood donating efforts not be in vain as mine was.

As a bit of a backstory, since about 2005 we haven't had a scale in the house at all. I don't know why. I've gone by how I felt as ffar as weight goes. The last few months I've felt just not so good. Tired a lot, felt right squishy, got a gut, wasn't fitting my pants properly anymore. We got a scale and I got a shock--I was up to 183 (!!!) pounds. I'm 5'8". That's much too much.

So three weeks back I started doing HIIT every other day in the morning. In those three weeks I'm down about 5 pounds. Which isn't all that bad. Especially considering I've been using an elliptical/cross-trainer on alternating resistances to do so. In a short time in a reasonable session length (~30 min) to start my day I've had some personally noticeable results. I feel great, I've slimmed down a fair bit, and I've put on good leg muscle. This leaves me to figure I've lost more than 5 pounds of fat/water and put on a bit of muscle with it as well.

I should start weight training tomorrow. HIIT is working my cardio and my legs pretty well. Would like to get my upper body more fit while I'm going about this.

Haven't made radical dietary changes because my diet wasn't the issue--it was my activity level. I may get a good 10-15 miles of walking just from errands a week, but that's not intense cardio, and that's only walking. what I have done is opted for more whole grains where possible and tried a bit harder to do reasonable portion sizes. I have already been taking the approach of minimal processed food for some time so that is fine. I also love vegetables but can't afford to eat them as much as I want to so i need to figure out a way to get more of them for less money. It will be a goal to up protein and fibre intake and reduce sugars over the next few months.

I am doing my best to keep up with this and how good it makes me feel is keeping me motivated, even if I loathe getting up early to work myself to the point of nausea and aches all over. Sucks then, feels great an hour after.

Next week marks 4 years of marriage as well. What a road it has been.

I keep trying to think of things to post about and never get around to it. I'll post some pictures I took instead.





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Oh. I do want a new lens from some tax return money but I'm torn as to what.

It is immensely frustrating to sit around all day with a food craving you have no hope of taking care of until much later in the day. Waiting, eating but still hungry for what you really want, just fixated.

the satisfaction when you do, though.... oh. That was good. It's just one of those feelings that makes life so nice.

The only shame I have involved is that the food in question was a chicken sandwich and I settled for a McChicken. It hit that spot so well all the same. And it was a dollar and I didn't have to cook. I wish all of my purchasing impulses were that cheap.

Ahh, where to begin, neglected blog? I guess the mundane will work. It's pretty much impossible to say that straight-faced without feeling like a complete ass.

all right.

We can start with today. I went for Pho today at the whim of someone else. Originally we were going to check out the Cafe at work to see if we could grab cheap pizza and coffee, but the realization dawned that really awesome food was just an extra 2 minutes of walking away. So there it went.

I cannot for the life of me understand why people who aren't vegetarians manage to dislike Pho Bac. It is so very flavorful, aromatic, and manages to be light but filling. And it's usually cheap. All things considered you can do a lot worse nutritionally dining out than that. But it is just so. damned. tasty.

There's only one problem--I'm possibly allergic to cilantro. the stuff's in everything these days. today I mistook cilantro for flat-leaved parsley. So every few mouthfuls I'd suddenly be hit on the tongue with this palmolive flavor, drowning out the delicious salty broth and steak shavings. I should have known to sample beforehand, but I didn't, and it was really the only down note to the food other than it being just a little more than I wanted to pay for soup.

That leaves me feeling a bit disappointed on another level. never in my life will I get to taste cilantro--I'll only taste some godawful soapy herb from hell. every time. In some way that makes me sad. but there must be more of you out there who taste the soap, not the cilantro, and find it jarring. I can tolerate it now when I expect it but if I don't it's like I'm chewing on the nozzle of some soap bottle.

In a more general scheme, I've been greatly enjoying both hockey and alcohol more in the last few months than I have in a while. cider, wine, vodka, and the Edmonton Oilers being my poisons of choice here. there's a game on right now and I'm going to crack into a bottle of granny smith cider soon as a matter of fact.

My adopted rats are doing great. very lively, very sweet. Still hand-shy but not aggressive. I am very glad to have adopted them.

Fox started doing tax work recently. After tax season is over he should be attending college again to finish his 2-year business degree, then moving on to the UNR to finish the 4 years for accounting and then further on to a CPA. Lean times get people to evaluate themselves a bit more. And they've been pretty lean as of late.

P.S. - Edmonton scored just before posting this. Awwww yeah.

I need to sit down and upload my photos to my desktop soon. Then post more about my trip. I've just been really tired since I got back, and busy with taking care of everything. Oh, and a little busy with Left 4 Dead. That's a fun game.

P.S. that bird is an asshole and wanted to eat my eyeballs.

One week until I finish work for November, pack my bags, and try desperately to catch SOME sleep. I am so very anxious. So many people and so little time... I probably won't even have a chance to see many friends at all on this trip, just family.



Also, what the heck, Canon released another X0D? Freakin' 50D only a year after the 40D came out. Bah. My only qualms with this thing are to do with the hot pixels in dark shots on high ISO. It is otherwise a dream of a camera body, and the 28-135mm lens I got with it is fantastic and quite quality. Looking forward to playing with it in Canada--dad's an avid photographer and lives right in edmonton so i imagine I'll get quite a few opportunities to go for sweet photo shoots and maybe astrophotography out of the city!