Fun day. A friend and I have been planning to become roommates soon - she is getting a divorce, I'm seperated pending a divorce, and we know and trust each other enough to move in together. Back when I first seperated, my family, specifically my parents, promised me some help in getting back out on my own. However, as time has passed, the promises have been rolled back - from them buying a used mobile home for me and me paying them back as I can, to me having to put down a substantial amount and then them cosigning for the balance. Today it all changed. My friend found out that she's getting joint custody, and will be needing a place a lot faster than we had planned; okay by me, I'm working and can help out paying bills and such. I go to my mother to see what help I can get...and am told that because of the circumstances that caused the need, I GET NO HELP AT ALL!!!!! Not even a cosign on a loan! The whole thing has me feeling utterly betrayed, and just about the worst I've felt since my wife left me. I just want out, but for some damn reason they are now determined that I be stuck living where I am. I don't know how much more of this I can take - I already don't even want to look at them...and this is my OWN GODDAMN FAMILY!
Yep...this one is going out to one specific person, who I have a minor bone to pick with. He'll likely be reading this looking for ammunition, trying to use it against someone else. STOP! Pal, you are making an absolute fool of yourself. Just stop, think REAL hard, and try to remember what acting like a decent human being. Got that memory? I know, it's been a few...well...several years, but I'm sure you can get it if you try really hard. Got it now? Okay...now, compare that to the way you have been acting the last several years, and most especially the last few months. Notice a difference? Good, good. Now, try real hard to figure out, based on the outcomes of both kinds of action, which one will likely serve you best in the future. Just a hint - it involves COMPASSION, rather than selfishness, LOVE, rather than lashing out, and even *gasp* COMPROMISE, rather than greed. Get your head screwed on straight, pal, or I think you are in for a VERY rough road in the coming years - the attitudes and "values" you've been desplaying are not likely to win you many friends, nor will they help you in keeping a job.
Well, life is doing it again. Today has been one of those days where I feel like I've gotten one up the arse with no kiss. About an hour ago, my best friend just called to say that her husband had just served her with divorce papers, and we aren't sure, but that might include a temporary restraining order to keep her off of their property. Half an hour later, as I'm stewing over that, the placement agency I was starting a new job through tomorrow called and told me the company now says they don't need me. In short - I'm now out of work and my friend is out of a home. Talk about getting screwed...
Go ahead, call me bizarre...but I'm building a world with Willow_river for the Neverwinter Nights PC game, and I've found myself sitting at the computer kind of mentally doodling. Sort of brainstorming, but with mental images of what I'm thinking of. Kinda fun, but most of it is going to suffer in translation, I'm sure; I'm nothing like the kind of builder she is, don't really have the patience for the kind of stunning areas she's cranking out. Still...the one that's chasing it's way around my brain right now involves a sort of cross between "Alice in Wonderland" and "Bizarro-world" from the Superman comics. A world where everything is sort of off-kilter from what you might expect. Willow and I thought it up together this morning, almost by accident, when she missinterpreted a suggestion I made yesterday. Now it's taking on a life of it's own in my head. We've already got elemental creatures that have opposite abilities - fire elemental that drown you, water that burn, etc., and an idea for a town of intelligent, friendly undead - skeletons, zombies, and whatnot - that wants to hire the PC's to rid them of a plague of the mindless, bone-eating living that keep coming from the graveyard. I also want to add a farmer burning crops so he can plant a forest. Somewhere in the village should be a man (well, skeleton) ready to do murder for the insult of being elected mayor. Toss in a forest teeming with dragons - that a cripple could kill (with hides, too, Feather...if they can get that far, they deserve 'em) - and absolutely deadly rats. Thinking of having a quest to rescue a helpless dragon from a fire-breathing maiden, just to be really silly. Another quest idea would be a genie that requires you to grant HIS wish. Gonna keep doodling...
Okay - I think I've gotten that out of my system for a while. While Im thinking about it...a plug for one of the best forum communities on the web - if you are willing to deal with strong scientific streak. A lot of them are atheists - but don't let that fool you. There are PhD's of all stripes, lawyers and political critters, people from all walks of life, and yes, folk of all religions; there always seems to be someone willing to explain things to the folk that haven't spent years studying them, too. Just don't go in expecting them to listen to your scientific viewpoint unless you've a) got solid facts behind it, b) have good solid logic, or c) know the work of the people that do well enough to argue for them. They've got forums for Church/State Seperation (though in practice it usually envelopes all of Constitutional law), Science, the Evolution/Creation debate, Moral FOundations and Principles, and more.
Maybe I should ask my ex if she thinks this is accurate, lol. Somehow I think I know what she'd say...and I don't know that it would be completely honest.
Your Love Style is Agape
You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.
Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.
You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.
Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.
For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.
Playing a bit here, and finding out that either these things are more accurate than you'd think, or I'm on one heck of a roll.
Your #1 Match: INFP
The Idealist
You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.
You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.
Your #2 Match: INFJ
The Protector
You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity. Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is. You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience. You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them.
You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.
To clarify...I'm a computer programmer by training, but I'm also a hobbyist jeweler, I make chainmail, do a bit of writing, am into herbalism, and seem to be the one a number of my friends talk to when they need an ear.
Followed a link from a friend's livejournal, and got this...considering I'm just coming out of a failed marriage, and the circumstances, I find this very interesting...
The Keys to Your Heart
You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.
In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.
Can't seem to get away from it. Just gets worse. At 6am this morning, my grandmother was taken out of the nursing home she was in to recover from heart surgery (they put in a few shunts), and put back in the hospital. Seems that besides a nasty antibiotic-resistant infection she picked up in the hospital the first time (we think), she's also managed to come down with pneumonia. My mother's scared as hell, and I don't blame her - things just don't seem to be going well. Add to that my own problems, worries about my friend, and very short sleep from worry...and I'm just not too solid today. Worst part is...there is very little I can do about my problems that I'm not already doing. Makes a person feel rather helpless, and that is a feeling I could very much do without; I've spent most of the last year and more feeling that way.
pissed off!
high
embarrassed
pensive