test
Ain't got nothing. Just keeping this from vanishing for the time being.
Marriate updates.
A new CBS Poll shows 42% of Americans support full equality for GLBT people:
Both Washington DC and New Jersey also seem to confirm those numbers.
That's good news. That means those in support of equality outnumber the bigots.
Second, what if you held a rally and no one came:
Marion Barry showed up. There's some delightful irony when a man who's been married four times thinks marriage needs protecting.
Third, and last, the lies are coming fast from the haters:
Forty-two percent of Americans now say same sex couples should be allowed to legally marry, a new CBS News/New York Times poll finds. That's up nine points from last month, when 33 percent supported legalizing same sex marriage.
Support for same sex marriage is now at its highest point since CBS News starting asking about it in 2004.
Twenty-eight percent say same sex couples should have no legal recognition – down from 35 percent in March – while 25 percent support civil unions, but not marriage, for gay couples.
As has historically been the case on this issue, liberals are more likely to support same sex marriage. Sixty-nine percent support the idea, while conservatives generally favor either civil unions (28 percent) or no legal recognition (44 percent).
Both Washington DC and New Jersey also seem to confirm those numbers.
That's good news. That means those in support of equality outnumber the bigots.
Second, what if you held a rally and no one came:
Jackson had a much smaller crowd than the thousands he had hoped for. As the rally began, there were well under 100 people; by the end there may have been close to 200.
Marion Barry showed up. There's some delightful irony when a man who's been married four times thinks marriage needs protecting.
Third, and last, the lies are coming fast from the haters:
The same combination of misinformation and willful deception is being rolled out this year, led by Tony Perkins and the Family Research Council. One alert to its members on March 31 claimed that a federal hate crimes law “could lead to the criminalization of the biblical view of homosexuality in sermons and elsewhere.” Said Perkins:“A ‘hate crimes’ law is really a ‘thought crime’ law that punishes a person’s beliefs – part of the Left’s intolerant agenda to silence the voice of Christians and Conservatives in America and eliminate moral restraint.”
Of course, that's about as untrue as things can get. I guess bearing false witness is fine if it's against gay people.
Remember, bias crime laws aren't about the status of the victim, but the motive of the perpetrator. A straight person can be gay bashed, and it would still be a bias crime.
Not to mention that the issue of speech versus conduct has been settle twice: once by the SCOTUS in 1993 (Wisconsin v Mitchell), and again, by the law itself which says in no uncertain terms:"Nothing in this Act, or the amendments made by this Act, shall be construed to prohibit any expressive conduct protected from legal prohibition by, or any activities protected by the free speech or free exercise clauses of, the First Amendment to the Constitution."
I guess this reveals the haters true colors: they think that killing gays should be free speech.
Here's a bit of trivia for you guys.
Back in the day, both the NAACP and organizations like the Association of Southern Women to Prevent Lynching proposed federal anti-lynching legislation in the early part of the last century. This was, of course, opposed by Southern states who said that the law was infringing on their sovereignty (they pointed out that they already had anti-lynching legislation - it was just rarely enforced). Funny thing though, to justify being against it, they said this:Lynching is but murder; and if...we can by Federal statue punish the crime of lynching perpetrated by individuals composing a mob, there is no escape from the conclusion that by Federal statute we can extend the jurisdiction of the Federal Government into all the states and against all crimes affecting, life, liberty, or property of citizens of the various states."
That's right, the laughably flimsy, "all crimes are hate crimes" was used to kill things like the Dyer Bill and other federal anti-lynching legislation.
Also, in the early 1980s, in Northern Idaho, white racist churches like Richard Butler's Church of Jesus Christ-Christian set up shop and their followers began harassing locals and businesses. When bias crime laws were considered, guess what they said? That's right, they claimed that such a thing would infringe on their freedom of speech and religion.
Sound familiar?
That's the good news for now.
You are not an expert.
Unless, of course, you are.
What I mean is this: there is a pernicious effect of the internet that makes people think they are endowed with the sum total of humanity's current knowledge of the world. In any thread concerning economics, it seems everyone is an economist. If there is a thread about the efficacy of a political party, everyone is a historian. If there is a thread regarding evolution, everyone one is a biologist. This is not to say that there is something wrong with people proffering their opinions; that is fine. What I have a problem with is the fact that even on a blog run by an acknowledged expert (say, Pharyngula), there are still people who think they know more, who think they know better, despite lacking the education and experience that comes with expertise.
In any debate I've ever seen, one of the first things that seems to occur is a questioning of someone's credibility. This is, again, a fine thing. It is good to know with whom one is speaking before embarking down a path that can lead to humiliation (as an aside, another interesting thing about the internet is that it smothers everything in a layer of insulation. One may be chastened or out talked, but it is a rare thing indeed to encounter genuine humility following such a thing). However, it is ever for any sort of establishment purposes, but instead an easy means to ending a debate before it begins. Let's use literature as an example. If one is a high school drop out, but a voracious reader and an obviously educated layman, what do they know? They've never been to college. Does the writer have a doctorate? Well, he's just a snob who can't appreciate the literature of the masses. If one has a bachelor's, why not a master's? If a master's why not a doctorate? And so on and so forth.
Following that are many posts, a flurry of links, and it eventually dies with neither side reaching accommodation. The worst part of this is that when dealing with a discreet topic (like evolution), there may be two sides, but only one is unassailably right.
Here's the crux of the matter.
The internet provides fast and simple access to so much information that it beggars the imagination to consider it. From the most broad google search to the deep web able to be accessed only by professionals, there is a wealth of facts and knowledge available that is astonishing to consider in it's entirety. That is part of the problem. It is easy to gain a vague understanding of so many things without a sincere, that is thorough, comprehension of a subject. This has given many people the false idea that they know all they need to know; they have conflated interest and novice level learning with that of the professor, the specialist, the authority.
It doesn't matter how little one knows or doesn't know, if one is sure of the truth of a position, then everyone else is wrong.
So, I'm here to say, "No. You are not expert."
That's not a problem provided that one is capable of realizing it.
In the meantime sit down, shut up, and let the real experts do what they do best. Read, and be happy for the opportunity to learn something new.
What I mean is this: there is a pernicious effect of the internet that makes people think they are endowed with the sum total of humanity's current knowledge of the world. In any thread concerning economics, it seems everyone is an economist. If there is a thread about the efficacy of a political party, everyone is a historian. If there is a thread regarding evolution, everyone one is a biologist. This is not to say that there is something wrong with people proffering their opinions; that is fine. What I have a problem with is the fact that even on a blog run by an acknowledged expert (say, Pharyngula), there are still people who think they know more, who think they know better, despite lacking the education and experience that comes with expertise.
In any debate I've ever seen, one of the first things that seems to occur is a questioning of someone's credibility. This is, again, a fine thing. It is good to know with whom one is speaking before embarking down a path that can lead to humiliation (as an aside, another interesting thing about the internet is that it smothers everything in a layer of insulation. One may be chastened or out talked, but it is a rare thing indeed to encounter genuine humility following such a thing). However, it is ever for any sort of establishment purposes, but instead an easy means to ending a debate before it begins. Let's use literature as an example. If one is a high school drop out, but a voracious reader and an obviously educated layman, what do they know? They've never been to college. Does the writer have a doctorate? Well, he's just a snob who can't appreciate the literature of the masses. If one has a bachelor's, why not a master's? If a master's why not a doctorate? And so on and so forth.
Following that are many posts, a flurry of links, and it eventually dies with neither side reaching accommodation. The worst part of this is that when dealing with a discreet topic (like evolution), there may be two sides, but only one is unassailably right.
Here's the crux of the matter.
The internet provides fast and simple access to so much information that it beggars the imagination to consider it. From the most broad google search to the deep web able to be accessed only by professionals, there is a wealth of facts and knowledge available that is astonishing to consider in it's entirety. That is part of the problem. It is easy to gain a vague understanding of so many things without a sincere, that is thorough, comprehension of a subject. This has given many people the false idea that they know all they need to know; they have conflated interest and novice level learning with that of the professor, the specialist, the authority.
It doesn't matter how little one knows or doesn't know, if one is sure of the truth of a position, then everyone else is wrong.
So, I'm here to say, "No. You are not expert."
That's not a problem provided that one is capable of realizing it.
In the meantime sit down, shut up, and let the real experts do what they do best. Read, and be happy for the opportunity to learn something new.
Sunday February 15th, 2009. 1:39 Ante-Meridiem.
Me: I want to be famous and then have kids.
Me: And I want it to be something amazing like curing AIDS
Me: So then my kids will always be "the son/daughter of the MAN WHO CURED AIDS"
Mike C.: ahahaha
Mike C.: you're a dick
Me: Yeah.
Me: yeah I am.
Me: And I want it to be something amazing like curing AIDS
Me: So then my kids will always be "the son/daughter of the MAN WHO CURED AIDS"
Mike C.: ahahaha
Mike C.: you're a dick
Me: Yeah.
Me: yeah I am.
(no subject)
Who is that handsome young man with a mane of curls and freakishly long sideburns? That young man with his thin lips tugged upwards in a smile?
Who is that twenty-something chap with a bounce in his step, whistling an infectious tune that you can't quite place?
Who is that rambunctious scamp who still reads and plays video games long past when a person with a healthy circadian rhythm would be slumbering like some sort of clumsy metaphor but wouldn't have it any other way?
Who is that guy who something something something?
Why, it's your inimitable host, who, after 11 years finally rescued all 300 Mudokens, that's who (with a lot of help from a certain person whose name begins with "r").
Who is that twenty-something chap with a bounce in his step, whistling an infectious tune that you can't quite place?
Who is that rambunctious scamp who still reads and plays video games long past when a person with a healthy circadian rhythm would be slumbering like some sort of clumsy metaphor but wouldn't have it any other way?
Who is that guy who something something something?
Why, it's your inimitable host, who, after 11 years finally rescued all 300 Mudokens, that's who (with a lot of help from a certain person whose name begins with "r").
A tribute to my cat.
My cat's name is Alex, and he's the best goddamned cat that has ever lived.
Look at him. Look.
He's sitting there, cool as ice. His tail is well proportioned, and he's looking at me because he responds to his name. Not every cat does that. He's also great at communicating what he wants easily. He doesn't meow, but he doesn't need to...because he's awesome.
Now, here he is catting it up in the living room. He'll watch if you do any sort of puzzles. I'm sure he's already solved them before I even begin again
This cat is the Einstein of felines.
That's right. You're seeing that correct. When he wants to, he'll lay down. He may take a nap, he may not. Only a cat that inscrutably awesome could get away with that.
Alex looking over his shoulder now. You can't get away with that if you're not awesome. If awesome could manifest physically, we'd never need energy ever again.
When he wants to, Alex will plop himself next to you. It's honor every time. I don't know why he does it when he does, but awesome needs no explanation.
Why is his tail wrapped around his feet this time? Because he's awesome, that's why. You really had to ask?
Laying on his other side. Is there anything Awesome Alex is incapable of doing?
When you take a long, hard look into the awesome, the awesome takes a long, hard look into you.
Even his yawns are awesome. I don't know how such a thing can be possible without some sort of license, but he manages it.
Look at that. He knows the magnitude of his awesome and he still doesn't give half a shit.
That's why Alex is the greatest goddamned cat who ever lived. He's only 7, so the world should get to it's knees and thank whatever god they believe in (or me) for having the foresight to keep such an awesome animal.
Look at him. Look.
He's sitting there, cool as ice. His tail is well proportioned, and he's looking at me because he responds to his name. Not every cat does that. He's also great at communicating what he wants easily. He doesn't meow, but he doesn't need to...because he's awesome.
Now, here he is catting it up in the living room. He'll watch if you do any sort of puzzles. I'm sure he's already solved them before I even begin again
This cat is the Einstein of felines.
That's right. You're seeing that correct. When he wants to, he'll lay down. He may take a nap, he may not. Only a cat that inscrutably awesome could get away with that.
Alex looking over his shoulder now. You can't get away with that if you're not awesome. If awesome could manifest physically, we'd never need energy ever again.
When he wants to, Alex will plop himself next to you. It's honor every time. I don't know why he does it when he does, but awesome needs no explanation.
Why is his tail wrapped around his feet this time? Because he's awesome, that's why. You really had to ask?
Laying on his other side. Is there anything Awesome Alex is incapable of doing?
When you take a long, hard look into the awesome, the awesome takes a long, hard look into you.
Even his yawns are awesome. I don't know how such a thing can be possible without some sort of license, but he manages it.
Look at that. He knows the magnitude of his awesome and he still doesn't give half a shit.
That's why Alex is the greatest goddamned cat who ever lived. He's only 7, so the world should get to it's knees and thank whatever god they believe in (or me) for having the foresight to keep such an awesome animal.
Reason number 56,721 why the internet is awesome.
The internet is unfathomably large as we all know. One can find all manner of cool and horrifying things if one is willing to look. You've got cool shit like Rotten Tomatoes and the revolting (and fascinating) like Gurochan.
Along the way you've got webcomics, 40 krillian blogs, religious websites, anti-religious websites, the cesspool of myspace, the venerable institutions like amazon and google, a plethora of annoying as hell memes (what will it be this year?), and of course, you've got your pariahs: Scientologists, and if you're old school, furries.
Then there are the things that are funny but unintended. Take a look at this (warning: porn, but the naughty bits are blocked out).
Now, you had to look at that because what you see next isn't as funny other wise.
There is another place that offers that same print. Specifically, this.
Don't see it?
Look where that picture is filed. Granted it's shoved into some dusty little corner where no one will find it without looking for it, but still.
I guess it helps to...vet what one puts on one's website.
Along the way you've got webcomics, 40 krillian blogs, religious websites, anti-religious websites, the cesspool of myspace, the venerable institutions like amazon and google, a plethora of annoying as hell memes (what will it be this year?), and of course, you've got your pariahs: Scientologists, and if you're old school, furries.
Then there are the things that are funny but unintended. Take a look at this (warning: porn, but the naughty bits are blocked out).
Now, you had to look at that because what you see next isn't as funny other wise.
There is another place that offers that same print. Specifically, this.
Don't see it?
Look where that picture is filed. Granted it's shoved into some dusty little corner where no one will find it without looking for it, but still.
I guess it helps to...vet what one puts on one's website.
Crappy shit.
What the fuck? Another lament?
Yeah yeah yeah.
Here:
My laptop died again. Problem with the internal power source. I was usin' a dell for a while until that decided that it would be better off dying than helping me pirate gay porn and store pictures of myself.
Now you're probably wondering what I'm writing on. The husband lets me use my laptop when mine is out of commission.
I gotta be up at 8 for the next couple of a weeks.
Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
Driving to Houston for chris muss and we don't want to do night driving like we did on the way up.
Man, fuck Oklahoma. Time has no meaning there or something. Seriously. On the drive up despite going through Texas for the majority of the trip, the longest stretch, felt like OK. We stopped at a Braums at one point and I had to take a shit. Even that wasn't enjoyable. Only Oklahoma, I tell you what.
The drive felt like this, I swear.
Not even joking.
Right, um.
I have to spend the week or so at my father-in-law's house which is in the middle of nowhere but near a lake which means I have to stop masturbating for a while. It's not that I have a problem doing at my father in law's house except that I do. That would be kind of awkward. Aside from the fact that we've had sex there a few times in the past.
So, right now that means that I have to drive back down only to stay in a place I don't want to be without my computer and I can't masturbate while I'm there.
On the upswing, I'm bringing the Wii and a few games so that'll help pass the time. Books too, but that's a standard on travel. I'm gonna miss Alex and Buford 2 while I'm gone, luckily a friend of Ryan's will be stopping by to feed the pets.
I get to eat at Manny's and I have to cram 2 months worth of hanging out into about five days.
The actual holiday is gonna be awkward as hell because I have no money. I'm just writing letters to the siblings and parents and pick up some books for my little sister and call the mother's side of the family when Hannukah rolls around.
Good things though: reconnecting with some old friends on the innerned. PIcking up some droogs back in H-Town. Sold off my drums (everything but the kit proper), which means money for books n getting the laptop fixed.
Just give me two weeks to get through this mountain of crap.
Yeah yeah yeah.
Here:
My laptop died again. Problem with the internal power source. I was usin' a dell for a while until that decided that it would be better off dying than helping me pirate gay porn and store pictures of myself.
Now you're probably wondering what I'm writing on. The husband lets me use my laptop when mine is out of commission.
I gotta be up at 8 for the next couple of a weeks.
Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
Driving to Houston for chris muss and we don't want to do night driving like we did on the way up.
Man, fuck Oklahoma. Time has no meaning there or something. Seriously. On the drive up despite going through Texas for the majority of the trip, the longest stretch, felt like OK. We stopped at a Braums at one point and I had to take a shit. Even that wasn't enjoyable. Only Oklahoma, I tell you what.
The drive felt like this, I swear.
Not even joking.
Right, um.
I have to spend the week or so at my father-in-law's house which is in the middle of nowhere but near a lake which means I have to stop masturbating for a while. It's not that I have a problem doing at my father in law's house except that I do. That would be kind of awkward. Aside from the fact that we've had sex there a few times in the past.
So, right now that means that I have to drive back down only to stay in a place I don't want to be without my computer and I can't masturbate while I'm there.
On the upswing, I'm bringing the Wii and a few games so that'll help pass the time. Books too, but that's a standard on travel. I'm gonna miss Alex and Buford 2 while I'm gone, luckily a friend of Ryan's will be stopping by to feed the pets.
I get to eat at Manny's and I have to cram 2 months worth of hanging out into about five days.
The actual holiday is gonna be awkward as hell because I have no money. I'm just writing letters to the siblings and parents and pick up some books for my little sister and call the mother's side of the family when Hannukah rolls around.
Good things though: reconnecting with some old friends on the innerned. PIcking up some droogs back in H-Town. Sold off my drums (everything but the kit proper), which means money for books n getting the laptop fixed.
Just give me two weeks to get through this mountain of crap.
Why the bigots have lost the battle.
I am 24 years old. I am a man; I am gay. I have been out of the closet for a mere five years, and in that time, I've had a slew of boyfriends. For the last 3 years, I have been married, in spirit if not legally.
Eighteen years of my life were spent in Texas, the nineteenth state to pass an explicit ban on gay marriage. Currently, I live in Kansas, the eighteenth to do so. Each of those states has their share of infamy. Texas, of course, is home to the Lawrence case. Kansas is home to Fred Phelps. They both have something in common: gay people live in both states despite the discrimination faced on a daily basis. Gay people thrive in both states. We live and love and laugh there. What's more, gay people live in every state, and did so even when we there were no protections, even when the idea was inconceivable.
Now, I can't claim to understand what it must have felt like to have been gay and out in those times. I doubt I could make that claim now. I donate money when I can, volunteer if I feel it necessary, I may even instigate an argument if I think it might benefit someone watching, but I am not a leader. I am out only in the sense that if someone were to ask me if I am gay, I would not, would never, lie. I would not conceal the truth. I would not deny what my husband means to me. Other people have sacrificed too much for me to be reticent in this regard. As the saying goes, “silence = death.”
Yet I am ashamed at not being as forthright as I think I could be. When we are out running errands, we usually walk side by side, and that gap feels all the larger for what it represents. There are many times when I see a heterosexual couple holding hands and wish I had the courage to close that gulf between us by the defiant act of lacing my fingers through his. The few times I've put aside any niggling, gnawing apprehenions, it was a terrifying, liberating experience.
I remember every look we've gotten when I've done that.
Despite knowing that other people's bigotry isn't my fault, I still feel a twinge of fear doing that, all the more so when I lived in Texas. That fear is just one reason why I tend be very discreet in my conduct. Often times, when someone learns of my sexual orientation, the first thing they say to me is, “But you don't act gay.”
And I think living my life as I see fit, honestly, if not loudly, is the best thing I can do.
There is no doubt in my mind that I could do more to strip off the insidious conditioning I've absorbed in any number of ways, but I've seen concrete results from doing what I've always done. In the past, I've had several people confess to me that, upon first learning that I am gay, they were uncomfortable around me. As time passed, that feeling diminished before vanishing all together.
I don't feel I need to do more. By living my life, I've changed people. I didn't have to argue, I didn't have to march in a parade or cheer at a rally. I didn't have to donate money or time. All it took was being human.
Just living my life.
That is why the bigots lost this battle before it even began. That is why they will have lost even if the Constitution is amended to codify their hatred.
Even if those wretched initiatives in California and Florida pass, there is no returning to the day before. People will know that gay people exist. They will know that we are just like them, that we value the same things they do in large part. There is nothing that can change that.
Even in the most hostile of climates, we lived our lives.
Even when faced with overt, unpunished violence, we lived our lives.
Even when faced with the most unconscionable of consequences, we lived our lives.
Even now, we live our lives.
If every state were to pass laws like the ones up for vote in Califnornia and Florida, the battle is lost in the most important way: we are still here. We have weathered the most terrible of times and survived. If those laws pass, we wil survive. We will continue to live our lives. In our own small, quiet ways, we can and will chip away at the lies, the smears, the verbal and physical assault, the hatred.
So, homophobes, you've already done your worst, and we're still here. Gay people are coming out at younger ages in many places. We are your friends and your neighbors, your siblings and parents, uncles, aunts, cousins, co-workers, bosses and subordinates, we write your TV shows and movies, we cook your food, we serve in the military, the police, the firehouses, we are around you everywhere, every day and you don't even know it.
Even if those laws pass we will go on living our lives and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it.
Eighteen years of my life were spent in Texas, the nineteenth state to pass an explicit ban on gay marriage. Currently, I live in Kansas, the eighteenth to do so. Each of those states has their share of infamy. Texas, of course, is home to the Lawrence case. Kansas is home to Fred Phelps. They both have something in common: gay people live in both states despite the discrimination faced on a daily basis. Gay people thrive in both states. We live and love and laugh there. What's more, gay people live in every state, and did so even when we there were no protections, even when the idea was inconceivable.
Now, I can't claim to understand what it must have felt like to have been gay and out in those times. I doubt I could make that claim now. I donate money when I can, volunteer if I feel it necessary, I may even instigate an argument if I think it might benefit someone watching, but I am not a leader. I am out only in the sense that if someone were to ask me if I am gay, I would not, would never, lie. I would not conceal the truth. I would not deny what my husband means to me. Other people have sacrificed too much for me to be reticent in this regard. As the saying goes, “silence = death.”
Yet I am ashamed at not being as forthright as I think I could be. When we are out running errands, we usually walk side by side, and that gap feels all the larger for what it represents. There are many times when I see a heterosexual couple holding hands and wish I had the courage to close that gulf between us by the defiant act of lacing my fingers through his. The few times I've put aside any niggling, gnawing apprehenions, it was a terrifying, liberating experience.
I remember every look we've gotten when I've done that.
Despite knowing that other people's bigotry isn't my fault, I still feel a twinge of fear doing that, all the more so when I lived in Texas. That fear is just one reason why I tend be very discreet in my conduct. Often times, when someone learns of my sexual orientation, the first thing they say to me is, “But you don't act gay.”
And I think living my life as I see fit, honestly, if not loudly, is the best thing I can do.
There is no doubt in my mind that I could do more to strip off the insidious conditioning I've absorbed in any number of ways, but I've seen concrete results from doing what I've always done. In the past, I've had several people confess to me that, upon first learning that I am gay, they were uncomfortable around me. As time passed, that feeling diminished before vanishing all together.
I don't feel I need to do more. By living my life, I've changed people. I didn't have to argue, I didn't have to march in a parade or cheer at a rally. I didn't have to donate money or time. All it took was being human.
Just living my life.
That is why the bigots lost this battle before it even began. That is why they will have lost even if the Constitution is amended to codify their hatred.
Even if those wretched initiatives in California and Florida pass, there is no returning to the day before. People will know that gay people exist. They will know that we are just like them, that we value the same things they do in large part. There is nothing that can change that.
Even in the most hostile of climates, we lived our lives.
Even when faced with overt, unpunished violence, we lived our lives.
Even when faced with the most unconscionable of consequences, we lived our lives.
Even now, we live our lives.
If every state were to pass laws like the ones up for vote in Califnornia and Florida, the battle is lost in the most important way: we are still here. We have weathered the most terrible of times and survived. If those laws pass, we wil survive. We will continue to live our lives. In our own small, quiet ways, we can and will chip away at the lies, the smears, the verbal and physical assault, the hatred.
So, homophobes, you've already done your worst, and we're still here. Gay people are coming out at younger ages in many places. We are your friends and your neighbors, your siblings and parents, uncles, aunts, cousins, co-workers, bosses and subordinates, we write your TV shows and movies, we cook your food, we serve in the military, the police, the firehouses, we are around you everywhere, every day and you don't even know it.
Even if those laws pass we will go on living our lives and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it.
...........
I've decided I'm through waiting. It's enough. I tend to rely on other people and that never leads to anything conclusive. I think a lot of people tend to wait becuase it's easy. More often than not, there will be results. Waiting in line at the store. Waiting for something to get fixed. Waiting in traffic.
It's easy, and it's easy to reassure myself that it's only temporary. I've been in this holding pattern, this stasis, this limbo for a long time now. I keep telling myself that it's going to end soon. Yet, I've done nothing to relieve myself of this condition. I sit around, glancing at my phone when expecting a call from bandmates. I find busy work to do until my boss orders me to do something. I stare at a blank word prompt hoping that words will appear on the page.
Enough.
It's enough.
If something in my life is going to happen, it will be because I wanted it to happen. Because I made it happen. Because I didn't wait until someone else who was just as dedicated, but more motivated than me came along to goad me into action.
This is my time now.
It's easy, and it's easy to reassure myself that it's only temporary. I've been in this holding pattern, this stasis, this limbo for a long time now. I keep telling myself that it's going to end soon. Yet, I've done nothing to relieve myself of this condition. I sit around, glancing at my phone when expecting a call from bandmates. I find busy work to do until my boss orders me to do something. I stare at a blank word prompt hoping that words will appear on the page.
Enough.
It's enough.
If something in my life is going to happen, it will be because I wanted it to happen. Because I made it happen. Because I didn't wait until someone else who was just as dedicated, but more motivated than me came along to goad me into action.
This is my time now.