Tags: new york city

Golden Girls

It Takes A Special Kind of Imbecile to Suck At "Delivery Boy"

Carlos and I just ordered breakfast from the diner we usually order from on weekends.

The delivery guy buzzed our apartment and we let him in.

And we waited for him to come to our door.

And waited.

And waited.

A-HA-HAND WAITED.

He finally got here, huffing and puffing. Carlos asked him what happened.

He didn't realize that apartment 403 would be on the fourth floor. He went to every other floor looking for apartment 403 before he got here.

My question, and I think it's a fair one, is, what floor did he think apartment 403 would be on?

Carlos's question, also a fair one, is, once he realized that all the apartments first floor began with the number 1, and all the apartments on the second floor began with the number 2, wouldn't it then stand to reason that 403 would be on the fourth floor?
Golden Girls

Oh, New York City. What *Haven't* We Been Through Together?

Lasting longer than the bulk of my friendships, today marks my 12 year anniversary of moving to New York City.

I fully consider myself a True New Yorker, and have for a while now. NYC and I have been through quite a lot together: 9/11, the 2003 blackout, the 2005 transit strike, the 2007 steam pipe explosion, Eliot Spitzer, Giuliani, a Subway World Series, a Super Bowl Championship team, the RNC in 2004, friends I've made, friends I've lost, friends who have reappeared after years and years, a puppy I raised and had to give away, 5 apartments, 5 jobs, sleeping on someone's couch for 2 months, meeting Carlos, dating Carlos, marrying Carlos, getting knocked up with Carlos, going to a Broadway premiere, meeting Hilary Clinton, scary cab rides, fun cab rides, hideous cab rides, riding the Cyclone, going down the Shore for Labor Day, Passover seders, Halloween parties and parades, Purim dinners, Christmas dinners, Thanksgiving dinners cooked in hotel rooms, being part of a live studio audience, the homeless man who used my feet as a pillow to sleep on the subway floor, the homeless man who refused my offer of pizza because he was, "watching his cholesterol," the homeless man who called me a racist when I refused to give him money, the homeless man who tried to hold my hand going up an escalator, the homeless man who told me to "yeah, suck it, baby" as I drank a milkshake, the homeless man who tried to light our subway car on fire, the clubs and bars I used to go to, the one time I went to CBGB's, the restaurants I've tried out, the restaurants I have on speed dial, every summer when I enter the New York Public Library's raffle drawing and every summer I never win anything, the countless walks around the Reservoir, the Mega tickets I buy and never win anything, jury duty x 2, giving directions to countless tourists, avoiding Times Square, being unable to avoid Times Square, secretly preferring Shea Stadium hot dogs over Yankee Stadium hot dogs, standing in line for Nathan's hot dogs, margaritas on Cinco de Mayo, beer on St. Patrick's Day, ice skating in Central Park on Christmas Day, going out for New Year's, staying in for New Year's, leaving the country for Valentine's Day, staying home with Carlos for Valentine's Day, vm's, tm's, and im's, evites and mass emails, recognizing places in movies and on tv, finding places on citysearch, complaining about places on menupages, brunch on the Lower East Side, drinks in the East Village, getting lost in the West Village, turning 21, turning 30, having my baby in Manhattan, growing up, growing old, living my life in New York City.
Withnail

Things You Don't Expect To See On Your Way Home

An NYPD truck with the phrase "Hostage Negotiation Team," just a block from your house.

Coming home from dinner with geckoboy, I turned 86th Street onto 3rd Avenue and saw a few cop cars and several NYPD trucks and vans lining 3rd Ave in front of the shoe stores and across from The Gap. One of those trucks was, yes, the Hostage Negotiation Team. Another truck had big spotlights lighting up the street, several cops were blocking off 85th Street between 3rd and Lex, and there was a news camera crew. On 85th Street were several fire trucks and the fire chief van, with an NYPD squad car pulled up to the front doors of the tall luxury building there.

I have no idea what happened; we have New York 1 on right now to see if they'll tell us what is going on, but it might still be too soon.

Hostage.
Negotiation.
Team.

.......*eyes wide with fear*
Golden Girls

If You Look Reeeeeaaaaaaaaaaalllllly Closely, You Can See The Ghost Of JFK, Jr. Jogging By

This morning I went for a walk around the Reservoir, but alone. Carlos usually comes with me but not today. It was foggy outside and the sun took a while to clear the clouds away. As I walked up Fifth Avenue to the Reservoir entrance it was still dark out, and the streets were quite empty. I took some photos.

Collapse )