Michael (
eudaimonikos) wrote in
deerfeed2020-07-06 01:25 am
un: eudaimonikos; video
Hi. I'd like to take a second to talk about these rumors.
We've all gone back and forth about whether or not they're true, but let's just be honest here - some of them are. I'm sure it varies, but most of the ones I've seen about me were.
[Michael doesn't feel too weird about admitting that on the network. He's pretty open about being a demon, after all. Most of the rumors are pure demonic activity; they probably didn't even surprise anybody who knows him.
(And if he's lying, and they were really all true - well, he's only covering for the ones that were just jabs against his appearance. Those don't mean anything.)]
So I just wanted to say - be kind to yourself. If you've done something, or been someone in the past that you're ashamed of now, it doesn't mean that you're a bad person forever. It doesn't mean that no one will ever accept you. Sure, it might make things harder, but even the worst person is capable of change. It's hard, and sometimes it sucks, and you will screw it up. But if you want to be better, then you can. If you're trying, then you already are.
If anyone wants to talk through anything like that privately, I'm always free. I'm not shocked by much, and I'm definitely not going to freak out on you. I like to think I'm not that big a hypocrite. [He smiles; it's a joke?] If you don't, obviously that's fine - just don't condemn yourself over it. It's okay to feel guilty, but you don't need to be ashamed.
Oh - also, let me know if anyone needs any food or bottled water. I'm just gonna skip eating and drinking until this ends, so all my stuff is up for grabs.
(( Michael is the Ultimate Reformer, and his rumors are here! ))
We've all gone back and forth about whether or not they're true, but let's just be honest here - some of them are. I'm sure it varies, but most of the ones I've seen about me were.
[Michael doesn't feel too weird about admitting that on the network. He's pretty open about being a demon, after all. Most of the rumors are pure demonic activity; they probably didn't even surprise anybody who knows him.
(And if he's lying, and they were really all true - well, he's only covering for the ones that were just jabs against his appearance. Those don't mean anything.)]
So I just wanted to say - be kind to yourself. If you've done something, or been someone in the past that you're ashamed of now, it doesn't mean that you're a bad person forever. It doesn't mean that no one will ever accept you. Sure, it might make things harder, but even the worst person is capable of change. It's hard, and sometimes it sucks, and you will screw it up. But if you want to be better, then you can. If you're trying, then you already are.
If anyone wants to talk through anything like that privately, I'm always free. I'm not shocked by much, and I'm definitely not going to freak out on you. I like to think I'm not that big a hypocrite. [He smiles; it's a joke?] If you don't, obviously that's fine - just don't condemn yourself over it. It's okay to feel guilty, but you don't need to be ashamed.
Oh - also, let me know if anyone needs any food or bottled water. I'm just gonna skip eating and drinking until this ends, so all my stuff is up for grabs.
(( Michael is the Ultimate Reformer, and his rumors are here! ))

Text - Then Video |
Why are you so-
[But this was the nice guy so he switches to video. He's still grim, death still swims around him. Richard looks confused. Then interested.]
Is this how things are done in your reality? As a demon? Talking things out like this?
no subject
No, not really. I hope it will be, eventually - our afterlife system has undergone some changes lately.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(text) | un: fringebenefits
Ultimate Reformer? You in the business of helping people turn their lives around?
no subject
I am literally a demon from Hell.
You can probably imagine what that entails.
[He has done some awful shit!]
I did help out a few people on Earth, I guess, but I won't be going back there after this.
Just a tad bit very illegal.
( video | un: mrs.s )
no subject
[In a way he's more familiar with?]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
Video; un: MysterioIsTheTruth
So what sort of redemption is available for somebody being marked as a villain when they really have been doing things for the greater good of everybody.
So a few people get hurt. Somebody gets hit by a train. Others die in an unfortunate drone attack.
Does that mean I should be called the villain here?!
no subject
You do understand that "the greater good" is the oldest justification in the book?
[He'd said he wouldn't condemn people, and he's still not interested in doing that, but that was more about people who felt shame and remorse. You should definitely feel remorse for hitting people with a train.]
What were you trying to do?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
video; un: atsushi
Instead, Michael mentions that he's going to skip eating and drinking. And Atsushi, who can't imagine any good reason to do that, responds with impulsive concern.]
Wait, please don't do that! You need to eat and drink too!
no subject
[He's bought supplies for Eleanor Jr. as well, but that stuff isn't up for grabs to begin with.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
video; un: clearthestreet
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Video, un: hexappeal83
Thanks, man. That's something that's good to hear right now, when this place seems to be trying to get to us any way it can. My rumors that I've seen, some of them are true, some of them were true, but I've been trying to be better.
This place might be f- messed up, but it's also sort of a new start. For me, at least.
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
text; un: moon_shadow
[ Was it being the Ultimate Moral Compass that had Shadow reaching out on the network when he usually didn't? The man speaking seemed well put together, not the type to slowly kill himself by giving away his food and water. Yet Shadow couldn't restrain himself from asking the question.
There was a genuine concern and kindness in his features for the stranger, not ridicule. ]
You won't be able to help out many if you don't take care of yourself.
no subject
[Shadow is not the only person with these concerns! Michael seems faintly abashed, but not really all that bothered; if anything, it's a bit gratifying that so many strangers would worry in the first place.]
But I don't. I'm not a human, so any eating I do is pretty much just for fun. I'm not even really feeling this heat everyone's talking about. [He can tell it's warmer, but it isn't uncomfortable.] So, since I'm not having any of those problems, makes sense I should try to help everyone else out.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
video; un: ushiromiya
[ But even though it's mostly said as flatly as.. well, anything else Ange ever says, but then there's a moment of hesitation. Like she wants to continue, but isn't sure. ]
.. Is it weird though to not feel guilty or ashamed? About most of it, I mean. [ That feels like the weirder reaction compared to how most people seem right now. ]
no subject
[Meanwhile, motivational speeches were actually a regular thing for him, once he entered management. He's always wanted to encourage people - just kinda depends towards what.]
I don't know. It took me a long while to start actually feeling bad about things. Knowing and feeling are a little different, I guess.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
video | un: beary
this is not a life barry would wish on anyone, not even his worst enemy. michael, how can you deny yourself such delicious burgers, fries, chocolates...
now he's hungry. ]
How's Eleanor Jr? Is she holding up?
no subject
[Michael appreciates the concern, though!]
How have you been?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
Text; un: sixfour
no subject
But no, of course not. I didn't regret anything I'd done for most of my life, and I didn't want to change.
I believe those people could - but if they aren't willing to try, they aren't going to.
video - private / un: vasiliy.yegorovich
Vasiliy knows how to do that too.
He did it every day for four years.
And, against all logic and all self-preservatory instinct, he feels compelled to tell him. Michael is, allegedly, a demon. Most of the things about him involve torture. If he's immortal, and involved in the ferrying of souls... he would know about the Purge, and maybe something about the why they repeated to themselves ad infinitum.
But the whole forgiveness act could most certainly be a ploy, like the promises of amnesty and safety of relatives.
That possibility should be enough of a deterrent alone, but it's not. Vasiliy stares at the screen in his hands for an interminable amount of time, even after his back starts to ache from the unnatural forward bend to his spine. Finally, on impulse, he presses the green button with a picture of a video camera on it, only for the regret to slam him before Michael's even answered. It would look even worse to call and hang up after a post like this than it would to simply stay on the line and say something else, though, so his only choice is to stay still and watch the screen, jaw tensed, dark eyes occasionally flickering toward the windows in search of the shapes of eavesdroppers.
When Michael's face appears, Vasiliy takes a few moments to formulate what he wants to say before actually saying it. ]
You are immortal, then. And you have tortured people?
no subject
[Michael inclines his head, brow furrowing a little. Vasiliy doesn't look like he's having a great time over there. But the question itself - well, he knew he was a demon, didn't he? It seems like all that stuff is just a matter of course. Still not great; maybe it was just seeing it put so baldly that made the difference?]
cw yezhovshchina references
(no subject)
cw discussions of torture/interrogation/psychological manipulation, smoking
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
video
What he isn't used to is seeing an adult really step up to speak about how to handle those things emotionally. He almost doesn't respond. Part of him felt too awkward and embarrassed. But a bigger part of him would always be intrigued by kind adults. They had been such a rarity in Derry.)
What do you get out of offering help to total strangers? (Eddie's tone is a little sharp, but there's a soft wonder in his eyes that contradicts his accusatory inflection.)
Are you a shrink or something?
no subject
In general, he's always just defaulted to speaking to kids the way he might speak to an adult. He has a vague sense that this might be incorrect, but no harm's come of it yet.]
No, no. My job - it is about helping people, but on a much larger scale than this. Kinda nice to do things one-on-one, actually talk to people. [.....] To be honest, some people helped me out like this once. It's only right that I pay that along.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
text; un: techgod
[ He knows all the ones about himself are, but he has it on good authority (his own) that some of the rumors about other people are not only false but slanderous. ]
People shouldn't believe everything they read on the wall of a bathroom stall.
[ switching to private ]
Do you really think people can change?
What about if they've been a tool for most of their unnaturally long life?
I don't feel guilty or ashamed, but
maybe I want to give "being better" a shot.
[ Incognito god asking a demon for advice. This is a strange place they're living in. ]
private text
I spent several billions of years being a tool, and I've been working on "being better" for maybe two.
So yeah, I'd like to think so!
I didn't feel bad about anything at first, either. I don't think it comes naturally to immortals.
Or maybe just my sort.
I'm trying to be less bitter about immortals in general lately.
private text
(no subject)
text; un: starked
Be kind to yourself?
[ If this weren't by text, Tony would be laughing dryly. Maybe that's why he's not using video, because then he wouldn't be able to hide the bitterness or self-hate so easily. ]
That's way easier said than done. And what does eating and drinking have to do with any of this?
no subject
No reason to make two separate posts.
And of course it's easier said than done. A lot of things are; doesn't mean they aren't worthwhile.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
Private Video; un: darkness
I've had some friends here tell me I can change from being an evil person into a different one. Not a good one, you understand, I'll never reach that point after all I have done and will do, but at least a different one. Sometimes I think they are right and sometimes I think I will simply disappoint them all by proving them wrong.
[He wonders if the demon has experienced anything similarly like that.]
no subject
That's probably inevitable. I did that a lot of times, but I think...you can't just decide to be better and do it, without making any mistakes. We're not perfect. Just...you apologize, when you screw up, and you try not to do it again.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
audio; private; un: no
[Despite the fact that he's a demon, is her implication here.]
no subject
[okay, Michael does realize this probably isn't a public speaking question, but look]
It's a little harder with such a wide audience, but I can't really do much about that.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
video; un: morningstar
You and Dr. Linda would get along.
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...