Deep Inside of Me

I have just got into my mind that it is time to let this man go. Good guy, but he causes too much confusion, too many misleading ways about himself. As a whole just not good for me. Mabye next lifetime....

Ending letter...

I apologize for leaving your stuff like this, but I’ve called and called to tell you and haven’t gotten to you yet. And seeing as I guess I’m supposed to be still waiting on you to return my call from like a week ago, I couldn’t be real optimistic about the situation. There are many things about you that I don’t understand, but I’m coming to the realization that I’m not supposed to. Simply put, some people are just not meant to be in your life permanently. There are many things about this set up, that I know I was to change within myself, but apparently I failed to do so. I think I want/expect too much out of this, and like I said before, I’m quite sure that we are looking for 2 different things. With that being said, I am aware that I’m not helping myself at all. Anyway, I appreciate getting to know you up until this point. I think you’re a great person. Very honest too, however you still lack in that area, or maybe it’s just me and I’m reading way to far into this. Whichever, it doesn’t really matter anymore. I know, I know, you don’t have a phone and you’re not really home, but see, that’s been the case before, and it wasn’t like that, so I don’t know, but I'm sure somebody does. :) If you’re still having issues and that’s the case, then I’m sorry about that, and hopefully this wont add to it, which I’m pretty sure it wont. I’m just tired of thinking, maybe something is really wrong, or to sum it up, just being confused as hell. I figure that I just have to face the harsh reality that you’re just not that into me and aren’t thinking about me, as I am with u. Which is cool, because you can’t be anyone but you. I have to get to the point where I’m living by “don’t make someone a priority in your life when they consider you an option.” You win some and you lose some, so I can accept my loss graciously. I hope your life gets better, and you get to the point at which you are striving for. I wish you the best, and I sincerely mean that.

Take care………Britt

OH! I got this shot glass for you in Florida, hope you like it.


With that being stated, it's time to move on yet again! Glad it isn't as hard as the last one.

Deal with a person that wasn't ready for a commitment even tho you thought you were?

Be mad if you felt they misled you?

Could you....

Accept it the person you were dealing with slept with someone else, like it was nothing?

Go on like all is the same?

Man how life seems to get it's grips on you and hold on for dear life.

Just started back to school, to finish my degree. So hopefully in less than 2 years I'll have a B.S in Biology/Pre-Med. Thinking about going into nursing, but I don't mind going to work in a Laboratory.

I'm working full time, and being a full time mom. Shit is crazy.

"I never sleep, cuz sleep is the cousin of death"

I have a somewhat boyfriend. We shall see. He's all good so far, but I swear if one of his habits don't give, I'm gonna go and purchase the patch for him and put it on him while he sleeps. I hate cigarettes.

Just planned my Memorial Day trip to Miami. I can't wait!!!! *Works out extra hard*

My life has been uneventful. I have a new boyfriend, who I for the most part like, but damnit I hate that he smokes. Something about cigarettes throws me into fits. It stinks and it reeks on people. yuck! So he thoroughly disgusted me yesterday. Was drinking too much and vomited. How freakin disgusting is that. I was like go on in the crib and go to bed, you've had enough. And to make it even worse, I wanted SEX!!!!! lol. But whoa is his body so amazing. I love it!

Had to drop another semi-friend. I swear that term be careful of what you ask for rings so true. I wanted my friends back, I wrote about them a little while back, and I seemingly have gotten that. But now that I've betrayed, it's like a bad relationship, very hard to go back. So after a few more incidents of being wrongly accused of things, I decided to let the friendship go, neither of us deserves that. I consider myself to be a good friend and when I'm trying but am not getting anything but accusations in return, I have to move on.

Planning a trip to NY!!!! Yeah, that ought to be great! Can't wait. Also going to NC. Might see my ex. But don't know if I really want too. I love it when you turn over chapters in your life. Makes the old ones seem so obsolete. Even tho I'll always love everything that he's shown and taught me.

So I'll close this journal entry by saying, I'm looking so forward to life, and looking forward to leaving some things behind.

I wish the best to all out there. I wish you abundant blessings throughtout your households and that there will be a chain reaction to all those that come into contact with you.

Be safe and Enjoy!!!

I'm happy I was introduced to live journal this year. It's help me out a lot. Thanks Alisha!

Well I'ma give my w/e a -5 out of a possible 10.

I didn't do anything. I went shopping and spent way too much money. And the fact that I'm an impulsive reactor has costed me yet another bf. UGH! When will I learn? Hopefully he calls me back, cause I'm already missing the ****!

I got a huge runaround with my school y'day. Trying to go back. But, I will be back in school at the end of February. Just to complete one course, at my current school, then it's off to my new school. Major change Biology, Pre-Med. It will be difficult, but I can manage. I would love to minor in Accounting. Double hard.

Whoever knew finance books are actually good?

I do now.

I can still hear his voice. I can still hear his laugh. I can still feel him kiss me on my forehead while I slept. And I miss it. Why does it take so long? Why can't feelings be controlled? Why do I have to ask why?

I love the thought of being in love.

Hi all

It's been a minute. I want to focus on losing weight, and I know a lot of you that are on my list have recently lost weight. What I'm looking for are things to do, and things to avoid doing. Please drop any type of info you can give that is usable. I'd really appreciate it.

Alisha, I still have what you told me in the summer, thanks for taking the time to do that for me. If you can add anything else, please do so. I'd like to begin A.S.A.P.

Time for the w/e. I can't wait to get it started. Have a bunch of plans.

I'm trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with me. Out of all of my ex's, which are a lot. lol. Only maybe 1 or 2 still like me, as in friends like. I find that crazy, that I get under people's skin like that. And, I swear I'm the nicest person I know. I have a problem with cheating, but I'm working on it. And, I really do have the best intentions at first. I hate it when they don't like me to the point where it's stay the hell away. What does that mean? I don't feel that I am that terrible, and I always confess. lol. Naw, I'm making a joke out of this, but I really do wonder....

Also, you ever didn't like someone, but you got over it, and you were chill about the situation, then you start thinking about old stuff and you just get pissed off all over again, like it happened y'day?

And, why oh why do people (mainly women) always have something to say about things they know nothing about? I mean it's like why are you even in this? And, who the hell are you anyway? Mind ya business!