Life

i don't know what i am doing, i am so fucked up right now in the head it isn't even funny. She is sending mixed messages and i don't know i am going to do and rob i think is trying to make me jealous so i figure that i iwll stay out of the commens so i don;t have to see it ne more and i don't really like the mix feelings she is sending because it feels like she just want to hang around and wait so idk and i really want her back but there is nothing i can do but just sit there and wait but i really don;t want to wait that long for her to come back and i want to find someone who loves me for me and not nobody else. She probably thinks that i have all the time in the world to wait for her but i don't. It is kind of fun to be single but after dating somebody for almost 3yrs you get use to having someone around and now i miss it but at the same time i like bein single because i can do waht i want but i dont no what i want right now. I miss her very much and i don;t want to be the one for her and rob breaking up if that does happen but it probably won;t and i hate that this is the way things have gone done but i swear to god if that motherfucker hurts her ne way of form i will snap that bitches neck lick a twig and he won;t know what hit him. I HATE THIS FUCKING SHIT SO GOD DAMN MUCH IT HURTS INSIDE and no one knows how much i am hurting because i haven;t told ne one. by for now from me

well i have made my choice not to talk to her ne more and her lil ass b/f say one wrong thing to me i am going to blow his shit and it is kinda werid that rob said that he never knew her when i showed him his pic and now all of a sudden they become friends and now they are going out and that is blow shit they haven't even know her for two months and now that is bullshit so w/e if they lil bitch says one word that is worng i am going to blow his shit and i know where he lives and i know where to find him and jessie will have to visit her lil b/f in the hospital so that is all i have to say so bye

well i have realized that she doesn't want to talk me really. she doesn't return my phone calls and i really don't like it but if that is the way she wants it then w/e it fine with me. i just wish that she would talk to me but i really don;t know why she won't, yes i have done some wrong things but she should still talk to me but i don't know what else to write so peace

hey all i am feeling confused right now. i didn't know how she feels ne more. she doesn't tell me things nemore like she used to do and she doesn't sound like she really wants to talk to me ne more. i feel like she is just blowing me off and i really don;t like it and it makes me really not want to talk to her. But i really don't know how much she loves me ne more and i don't think she loves me ne more and really doesn't tell me or show me. But i hope she knows i still love her with all my heart and i want her to know that but she probably doesn't even care what i think about her and she seems happy when she is not with me and i get depress when i am on the phone with her because i can't say i love you and i can't say the things i used to say and it feels really weird for me but w/e i will write more later bye

i hate my fucking life soooo much. i do the stupidest things and i have done to way stupid thing now. i wish i would just die because it hurts sooo much. Jessie and i broke up again and i think for good now but i wish we never had broke up. i love her soo much it hurts soo much deep down inside i know that i did the dumbest thing i have could have done but what is done is done and now i probably have lost her forever and it going to be werid going back to LO with her being there, i am going to just stay to myself. Just go to school and work and get what i need done and get on with my life because i am dumb as hell but death is my only wish now so i can be with some of my family that i know will ba there for me and i know my dad is watching over me and he probably thinks i am stupid to which he is right but w/e ever i just wish i would DIE NOW!!

hey all it's been really long time since i ahve updated like last school. well i had fun over hte summer i work alot and got to see my girl alot. well homecoming was this past weekend in lo as people know and i was there bout time. well i got to drive me and my girla dn our friends to homecoming it was a blast i love dancing with my baby. i was driving till 1 in the morning just me and my baby since our friends got into a fight but it was fun just me and my baby well i have been work 4 days a week through the school year so yea but i don't know what else to say so ttyl bye

hey all i never really update on here ne more . well i am going to a concert tomorrow Rascall Flatts woohoo. i am really mad that my girls dad doesn't really like coming to get me ne more but oh well that's just them. i love my girl with all of my heart. i just wish i could be back in lake orion with all of my freidns and my girl so i can see them all. well i really don't know what esle to say so ttyl bye

wow it been a long time since i have updated. well i had to move because the house i was in the lease was up so that sux and now where i live is better a lil bit. well as everyone knows me a jessie aren't engage ne more but maybe it was for the best because i think we are coming closer again then what we were but that's what i think, i don't know what she thinks about it. well i have to leave the school that i am in now and go to southfield with most black people, i am not races or ne thing i just don't like being in a place where there is only a few whites. well i am suspose to be going to a rascal flatts concert next weekend so that will be kool and i am going camping with my baby at the end of the month so that is going to be tight. well i don't know what else to write so ttyl bye

so wud up yo well now i had my house meeting and they are talking about moving me or my roommate in june because we are close friends and they don't like it and i get back 100 and something amount of money back for the rent take i didn't pay so yea whatever i was so aggravated last night so yea well ttyl bye

well i haven't updated for a while because i am just to busy to to update and i work alot but which is good so i don't have to listen to the shit at my house. well life suxs i have court on thrusday and i am tried of being fucking dicked around in this fucking program throw the state. i am the only one that got and job first in that hell hold and i still get fucking treated like a lil fucking kid and the fucking staff tells us to stop being lazy well look at them they sit on there fucking fat asses alll day until they leave for break and i thought it's suspose to be independent living bull shit. well i just fucking at what my life has become, a fucking hell. well w/e fuck the world