I've been manic all week, frantic, crying, laughing, terrified of the future. In danger for the first time ever of failing classes. Got a job offer, but don't know whether I want to accept it. Terrified in general of real life and not being here anymore and going crazy because I'm not sure what's next. Was ready to leave high school, so didn't mind going to college--loved it. Not sure I'm as ready to leave here. Like my space, different people, role models, opportunities here. Having a bathroom of my own!
Have two more papers to write, 4 to hand in total, one more exam, and lots of praying that the exams I've taken get me a passing grade in the class. Sccaaaaared. Was just kidding when I said I wish I failed more classes and could stay here. Time to graduate.
It's magic to revisit the work of someone of whom you were once jealous, only to find that his ability has not grown and that your own has surpassed it.
i think all i'm really looking for is the man in every sappy country song i heard as a kid. but none of the mamas ever did let their sons grow up to be cowboys.
friday-worked in cheshire, hung out with my little brother (i think)
saturday-did some stuff in cheshire?, drove back to uconn
sunday-did work/laundry? tried to be productive
monday-more work, babysitting, oil change
tuesday-laziness, tutoring at hartford, back to cheshire
wednesday-worked all day, hung out with jayna (and matt and parents), spartans for drinks with katie and dave (and elaina and kelly), wings (microwaved-oven not turned on), adult swim
thursday-drove to new haven/woodbridge for thanksgiving with mom&tom's friends
friday-annual katie & kellan black friday shopping trip, nap, drove to clarkson with dave, explored clarkson while he did his army thing, flipped a coin (no canada), dinner and drinks at mexican place, movie (incredibles), card games
saturday-drove back to uconn, made dinner (pasta-bad, meatloaf-okay), becky, juba, and mikey came over, card games & drinks, movie (charlie and choc. factory), part of movie (pool hall junkies), bedtime
sunday-pancakes (cinnamon bc there was no nutmeg), reading, nap, beginning and end of movie (ed wood) with more reading in between, phone calls, general laziness (more expected)
From kessicajelly via misfitsfanfare (it's early and i'm late for work, as well as too lazy to do an lj code thingy):
If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, even if we don't speak often, please post a comment with a memory of you and me (more fun if you post anonymously and i have to guess). It can be anything you want, either good or bad.
When you're finished, post these instructions on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people remember about you.
And just as Jessie (and Mike) said, if nobody replies, I'll be really embarrassed too.
i want to be max from where the wild things are next year for halloween. so basically, i need a furry white wolf suit with a hood that buttons up and has feet. and a crown, but that's easy. where would i even begin to look for this stuff?
i'm starting my annual novel at midnight (or tomorrow if i don't feel like staying awake). the plan was for it to be sort of random and crazy, but the more i think about it, the more literary it is becoming. i'm writing it by hand. wow this is boring.
p.s. spent the weekend at clarkson. still not drinking. it feels nice.
my to-do list from last night is 75% crossed off. this is unlike me because:
1. i usually make my to-do lists long and rambling because they are to avoid doing any work at all, and they turn into works of prose themselves. this one had 4 items in only 8 words.
2. i usually lose the list before i check anything off, only to find it again 3 months later and stress over the fact that, in fact, none of the items have been done. this usually prompts me to create another list. repeat if desired. this list is still found.
3. i actually did the things that i crossed off (as opposed to crossing off simply in anticipation of doing those things, or crossing them off because i did them last time so i'm sure to do them again, or (my favorite) crossing them off because they were done before i made the list).
4. i like lists.
5. this is no longer a list of reasons why this particular list is unlike me, but rather a list of its own. this is usually what my to-do lists look like. (maybe "list of things i want to say"?)
6. i cleaned most of the apartment today, and moved the furniture in my room.
7. the end.
8. p.s. i'm writing a novel for november: the things i know are the main character's name (he's a male and no i won't tell you the name) and that i want it to be magic realism. any ideas, criticisms, encouragements, dirty jokes, requests, questions, complaints, dialogue you'd like to see included, real life situations that you specifically do not want fictionalized for my own purposes, etc. can be left here or sent to me by postal mail (call for my address). you get more points for the real mail thing. even more points for sending me a good list.
