*sigh*


I did not miss the overthinking involved in lifeguarding

I have been lifeguarding the last 3 days,


I played Guitar for many hours

Read Zen and Malachy for many hours



But mostly I thought

I really like Christy, she's alot of fun and Im happy to be getting to know her...

And I am continually dwelling on what happned with Amber, I try and try to lock it out. I wish I knew this guy, I wish I knew how she felt, I wish I knew what she was up to, I wish I knew if she'd ever take me back as a friend, I wish I knew what to say monday if I see her. What I did was bad, and it was bad what Ben said to me, and it was bad of Amber to let him say things like that to a friend of hers, and those things I said back were provocational, and the things he said about Amber's friends in general did not speak well of him.

Whatever happened? We were such great friends for so many months...

I just want to know when we can be friends again, and how we can go about getting through this. Not communicating....I despise it.



I have a cookout to goto tommrow and Mark wants to go to Matrix saturday night, not my cup of tea, but I want to see Mark before he leaves.


I dont want drama, I want to just think about Christy for the most part. My brain wont let me, I go to bed thinking about Christy, and awaken thinking about what happned with Amber.



I moved stuff into Merrimac *the new house* today. My room looks great, I got a fake fireplace and everything :)...

After playing the blues *litterally, I was playing blues guitar the last few days* I have taken a severe intrest in Blues...I have always liked Jazz but I honetly never got around to too much Blues, I suppose Soul is next.



I hate being outside the window looking at the kids having fun in class...