It's good to be in love. It really does suit you
I'm happy you're in love, 'cause every color goes where you do
Rating position
Journal created:
on 28 March 2004 (#2651931)
Updated:
on 22 November 2013
Name:
Lore
Website:
She's sitting on the main bench watching the game. It's been 22 minutes since it started and yet she hasn't got her chance to play. She's been paying attention to every move, every goal, every fault. At first, she tried to decipher the oponent, but as time goes by, she understands it's not about the opponent, it's about the game, about being in the game. She's had many coaches. She doesn't even realize when they go and how they come. But they're always there, giving her instructions, commenting the game. A few times, she's been instructed to take off the jacket, start the warm ups. The excitement was there, the permanent fear, the light hurts her eyes and despite the inner voice telling her "you're not ready, you're not ready", she does as she's instructed. But something happens. Something always happens. The other team changed the strategy and she no longer fits in the plan. There's rain, and she's not trained for playing in the rain. Someone else is better than her. Something always happens. There was a moment of the game when she vibrated with every movement, right now? She just hugs herself, zips the jacket and waits in the corner. She looks up once in a while when no one is looking. She's tired of pity stares, so she pretends she doesn't really care. Just a couple of minutes ago someone sat next to her. He held her hand, told her they'd go out to the field together. The coach, the physical trainer, the president of the team gave them disapproving looks. He plays in the front, she plays in the back, they're not supposed to play together, it's just wrong. They're waiting in line, hand in hand. She's nervous as always, but his presence is comforting. She looks down and sees she's wearing the wrong shoes, she needs to change them. She lets go of his hand. When she's back, he's already in the game. Away from her and she's back in the bench. Sometimes she thinks it'd be easier to get in with someone else. She lost her chance once and it'll probably never happen again, but the clock keeps ticking and she feels like she needs to be there. Now. But she's still sitting on the main bench watching the game. |
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