In The Shadows

This is an interesting little game. It looks cute. Just make a toon and go.

C'mon: fight me! dzaka.mybrute.com

:)

I'm moving to a new blog. Until further notice I'm now found over at:

http://8grafix.net/


Good-bye.

The end of pretending.

At least that's something good, right?

Other than that, business as usual.
Busy, trying to get everything done, one step at a time.

Real life pisses me off right now. But that is not unusual.

The sun keeps on shining and somehow I missed spring. Where did that go?
It is kind of hot 'round here and I am just so glad that I have a shower. :)

Work is not good right now. Too much things I need to do and just can't. Keep on hitting walls here and there. Added pressure by an ultimatum is not helping things at all. Well, maybe he thinks I needed waking up?

It felt bad, I went to see my mom. Felt better. Good that I can still stop by whenever I need someone to talk to.
I can understand him, but I normally react very badly when faced with an ultimatum I know I cannot keep.

Such is life.
It's just too sunny sometimes.

... and then you can't stand the rain.

What Your Taste in Chocolate Says About You

You are sweet, mellow, and easily satisfied. You don't like anything too intense and dramatic. Deep down, you're a kid at heart... and you're nostalgic for the past. You are mellow, spiritual, and philosophical. You are a true humanitarian. You enjoy helping people. Your heart can be too open at times. You sometimes over-extend yourself. You love the feeling of accomplishment. You enjoy doing what's important. You feel lost when you have to do frivolous tasks or hang out with shallow people.

I can't sleep properly. Not that I have trouble going to sleep, people keep me from actually going to bed.

Over the last few days some things didn't go as planned. Stuff has been happening at work that was interesting to know and really upset me so that I took Monday off to think things through and have a long conversation with my mom about it and of course with Ern.

Things have been getting better this week, I think but still it has left me thinking how I can even screw things up by doing ... nothing out of the ordinary. Well, if it is ordinary for me, so I have learned, it may not be ordinary for other people who have much time on their hands to talk shit about me and someone else.

There can be two different solutions for this: tread softly or give a damn about what people say. That someone else has hinted at "let them talk" I, on the other hand, lean towards the "tread softly" method. I don't want to get us into trouble just because I was too ignorant of the fact that people will eventually get jealous and just because they can make things difficult for you - proceed on making it worse.

I cannot count on any real help, so "tread softly"? Sounds good to me.

Ern has made several interesting observations and guesses about why this has happened and had to happen or should I call it "a social study on fellow office characters".

The only thing that went through my mind as I crawled back home frustrated and with tears in my eyes on Friday was: "how can you be so absolutely naïve?". A good cry and a nights' sleep later it was better and talking helped.

My mind is still a jumble, so sorry if this does not make much sense at all.
To make things short: work gossip is a pain in the butt right now, to put it lightly.

But then I drove my bosses' car this week, and hey that was nice. Really nice. Somehow he didn't want to trade... ;)

So sunny moments are there as well, not all is bad. And treading softly now... and hoping things will blow over.

... and leave already.

It's bad enough that he agreed to my meek "you don't care if I'm there or not", but actually contemplating talking to him ever again and just wishing it wasn't so - I am out of my mind right now.

I'll be staying away. This just to remind me of that conversation.

Tomorrow I'll be at Cologne airport to meet Ern, so this all isn't quite as bad as it seems. So just a bad taste in my mouth. Trying to move on. Good thing. Good thing.

*good night*

*very sleepy*

... and I think I'm getting a cold.

I can tell you I am pretty tired and well, the word "exhausted" is clearly an understatement of what I feel right now. But it is done. My own flat, all done and moved into. Weeks of painting, laying floor and all those little things, done and over.

To say that I am "glad" is the next understatement that comes to mind.

/cheer


Still there's some small stuff to be bought ("where are the plates? do I actually own a saltshaker? and where are my kitchen knives? do I own kitchen knives?") but basically I'm sleeping in my own bed in my own bedroom and that makes up for the small difficulties, like wanting to cook, just to find I don't have any salt...

And Ern is staying with me over the next week-end which came quite unexpected (now I need a second set of bedding) but I'm very excited that she finally has the chance to visit again! It's been too freaking long.

And no, don't expect Jumpnow-things to happen. We don't have that kind of time, dears...


=)

I just got a bottle of water from the vending machine and on it in fading black letters was written "open at 12.30 on 7-11-07".

Recycling is good, but this is somehow not the thing I want to find on an un-opened bottle of water.

It's worth an entry, though.

;)

There was a funny post on one of the American WoW forums, but unfortunately it got deleted (I think because of namecalling), I just had a look at google and yes, it is cached. ;)

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