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areyougameTitle: Missed Glances
Author:lythdan
Rating: PG
Warnings: angst angst angst also character death (are you sensing a theme here)
Word count: 533
Summary: Aura attempts to diminish her interest in Metis with little success.
You left it too late, idiot.
Metis is seven months pregnant and delighted, the physical embodiment of every platitude ever said about 'maternal glow.' She clasps Aura's hands and tries to twirl her, laboratory transformed into a dance floor but only in her mind.
Aura stands still, unmoved, and Metis droops, eyes skitting to the floor. "Can't you at least pretend to be happy for me?" she asks, and Aura has never been a very good liar. Not when it comes to this woman at the very least.
She wrenches herself away from Metis's grasp, which causes her friend, her subject of adoration, to look up at her, clearly hurt. Aura looks her in the eye as she speaks her refusal. "No. And I won't explain myself again."
Metis withdraws into herself, worrying at her lip. "I know you've never liked children, and I just thought that maybe, we could --" But she cuts herself off, fixing her gaze somewhere over Aura's right shoulder. "It doesn't matter. I shouldn't try and change your mind." She offers Aura a weak smile, and despite her despair and frustration, it still makes her weak at the knees. "You're perfect the way you are." And then Metis beams and looking at her is like looking into the sun; she ought to look away lest she be blinded.
It's so hard, but she tears her gaze away and takes a step back. She needs the space to breathe.
The thing is, Aura has never been very good at lying; the only person she's ever been able to deceive is herself. Let Metis thinks that she hates children, Aura thinks, and not the fact that Metis desperately wanted something that Aura could never provide. Once upon a time, she thought that maybe, maybe she'd had a chance.
But Metis is right. Metis is always right. She finds herself repeating Metis's words to herself, like a mantra.
I shouldn't try to change your mind.
You're perfect the way you are.
She turns on her heel to leave the room before she says or even does something she might regret. The sun is beautiful. The sun is fierce. The sun remains forever out of reach.
If she had looked back, she would have seen Metis's wistful glance at her retreat. But Aura doesn't.
She never does.
--------
Oh, but how she wishes now she'd said something while she'd had the chance. Aura had never set out to hate Athena, not really, but how could she not? She had told herself so many times it was irrational to be jealous of a child, of the bond between mother and daughter when she so clearly wants so much more, but even though she is a scientist she cannot be completely logical at all times.
And now Metis is dead, and each suspect is as unlikely as the next.
Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.
Sometimes, she's not sure who she's more angry at these days. Simon, for saving Athena despite implicating himself. Athena, for not being able to come to Simon's defense when he needed it most.
Other times, when she's alone in her cold and empty bed, she's certain.
She hates herself the most.
Author:
lythdanRating: PG
Warnings: angst angst angst also character death (are you sensing a theme here)
Word count: 533
Summary: Aura attempts to diminish her interest in Metis with little success.
You left it too late, idiot.
Metis is seven months pregnant and delighted, the physical embodiment of every platitude ever said about 'maternal glow.' She clasps Aura's hands and tries to twirl her, laboratory transformed into a dance floor but only in her mind.
Aura stands still, unmoved, and Metis droops, eyes skitting to the floor. "Can't you at least pretend to be happy for me?" she asks, and Aura has never been a very good liar. Not when it comes to this woman at the very least.
She wrenches herself away from Metis's grasp, which causes her friend, her subject of adoration, to look up at her, clearly hurt. Aura looks her in the eye as she speaks her refusal. "No. And I won't explain myself again."
Metis withdraws into herself, worrying at her lip. "I know you've never liked children, and I just thought that maybe, we could --" But she cuts herself off, fixing her gaze somewhere over Aura's right shoulder. "It doesn't matter. I shouldn't try and change your mind." She offers Aura a weak smile, and despite her despair and frustration, it still makes her weak at the knees. "You're perfect the way you are." And then Metis beams and looking at her is like looking into the sun; she ought to look away lest she be blinded.
It's so hard, but she tears her gaze away and takes a step back. She needs the space to breathe.
The thing is, Aura has never been very good at lying; the only person she's ever been able to deceive is herself. Let Metis thinks that she hates children, Aura thinks, and not the fact that Metis desperately wanted something that Aura could never provide. Once upon a time, she thought that maybe, maybe she'd had a chance.
But Metis is right. Metis is always right. She finds herself repeating Metis's words to herself, like a mantra.
I shouldn't try to change your mind.
You're perfect the way you are.
She turns on her heel to leave the room before she says or even does something she might regret. The sun is beautiful. The sun is fierce. The sun remains forever out of reach.
If she had looked back, she would have seen Metis's wistful glance at her retreat. But Aura doesn't.
She never does.
--------
Oh, but how she wishes now she'd said something while she'd had the chance. Aura had never set out to hate Athena, not really, but how could she not? She had told herself so many times it was irrational to be jealous of a child, of the bond between mother and daughter when she so clearly wants so much more, but even though she is a scientist she cannot be completely logical at all times.
And now Metis is dead, and each suspect is as unlikely as the next.
Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.
Sometimes, she's not sure who she's more angry at these days. Simon, for saving Athena despite implicating himself. Athena, for not being able to come to Simon's defense when he needed it most.
Other times, when she's alone in her cold and empty bed, she's certain.
She hates herself the most.