Story Time

oh man, I swear to god someone once told me that cats were really intelligent. Whoever said that must be fucking lying because there is seriously the stupidest cat living around here somewhere. For awhile some cat/s have been coming into the house and pissing and eating Squiggles' food. We've been trying to make them stop coming in here and pissing on the walls and the floor cos its gross. But the real tale began last night...
( caught red handed!Collapse )

okay...so this one time, at band camp...i was searching around asking how I could join this community...and i met this wonderful man...



and when i said "hello bush"...i laughed because i'd made a pun

One windy winter evening I was driving around pretty fast in a rush to get home. It was kind of hard to see what with all the sand the wind was kicking up. Suddenly, I hear a loud thump and the car shakes noticeably. I hit something and it wasn't that small. Paralyzed with fear I just drove home as fast as I could. The next day I found out a couple of people died in the windstorm in automobile related accidents but I didn't look into it any further because of my fear of what I might find. I went and washed off the blood off of my car. I thought maybe I hit an animal but it's unlikely as I was in a residential area.

so i'm at a football game ozark arkansas with this guy that i really liked. i don't really like football so i was just kind of looking around and i spy this little kid on the sideline taking pictures. i couldn't see his face cause he had his hood up.

when all of a sudden some football players come running out of bounds and tackle the little kid.

the whole crowd gasps, except me, i bust out laughing as loud as i can.

as it turns out, it wasn't a little kid at all, but a little old lady.

i'm such an asshole. and the guy i liked didn't like me after that cause i laughed at old people.

This is based on a true story, real names were not used to hide the identities of the people involved.


( PG: Parental Guidance Suggested. This Story Contains Sexual Themes That May Not Be Suitable For Children.Collapse )

The lawn was very long at Dan's house so we decided to mow it cause we could hardly see the house.


We got out the mower and filled it up with petrol but we couldn't get the grass catcher on the back of the mower.


Bill and Angela from next door came over and tried to do it but they couldn't work it out either. They are from Ireland and talk like leprechauns.


Once I was on my own I figured it out all by myself, because we had to take the mulcher off the back to get it on there.


Then Dan could mow the lawn and now everyone can see his orange house again!

The End.

Once there lived a dog named Ruff. He was a happy dog.


One day a bumble bee stung Ruff on the tail. He needed an operation.


Ruff made a sign and hoped that people would give him money.


Soon Ruff had lots of coins and could afford the operation on his tail.


So off Ruff went to the vet, and the vet made his sore tail go away. The End.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hahaha the end!!!

A picture story, because I'm not the greatest writer in the world. >.>

hi mi newwwwwwww and this is my story!!

 One day two kids were walking down the road, robert and chad. all of a sudden a bird came down and pooped in chads mouth because he was singnig, so robert laughed his head off and todd the bird was  jealous because  mitch got to drop one so while robert was laughing todd...

 

the bird pooped on his head!!

 

~the end~