how about you stop fucking around and call me when you're ready to actually get serious about appetizers

one of my earliest video game memories was my neighbor from down the street burning me a copy of Roller Coaster Tycoon onto a CD and giving it to me for free, with the caveat that one day a week he would sit behind me and backseat game HARD. like "build this here, okay now build this here, no not there, HERE, okay now make a path here," etc etc. i never minded it at the time, i genuinely had no idea how to play so i thought he was teaching me. years later i learned that him and his family were Orthodox Jewish and him backseat gaming me was his way of getting around the Sabbath ban on playing video games

Really obsessed with this exchange

I’m brunette, I have perky tits, and a fat shapely ass. Thank God that’s out of the way now let’s talk about how exhausting everything is. Does anyone else just feel like giving up.

yo get off your ass i need you to come up front and call a customer the f slur for me i cant reclaim it

How to Flirt With a Lesbian: A Comprehensive Guide

ALT

there is a string of towns and parks around the world, with gardens and amusements and attractions, all named after each other, all named Tivoli. in denmark the word tivoli itself means funfair and is the name of a historic theme park incorporating rides and theatrics and fairy tales

it's a site for make believe. everything in this movie is intentional

my goat

This is the equivalent of at least $200 worth of jet fuel, at the very, very lowest end of the scale

Detail of vault with flowers and birds, Archiepiscopal Palace Chapel (interior), mosaic, c. 494-519, Palazzo arcivescovile di Ravenna (Ravenna, Italy) (JSTOR)

clicking a pen over and over again is actually fun as fuck its a shame it makes everyone in a 30 foot radius want to kill me with a rock

shoveling handfuls of baby carrots into my mouth after jerking off to create a pavlovian response that allows me to see fine details at 2 miles whenever I get an erection