The way that checkboxes work is that the value is only submitted if the box is checked. If the box is not checked, nothing is submitted for that element in the form. In the server code, you need to check whether the parameter with the given name exists. E.g. in PHP you would write:
if (isset($_POST['opted_in']))
If you want something to be submitted in both cases, you could use radio buttons instead of a checkbox:
<input type="radio" name="option" value="opted_in" checked>
<input type="radio" name="option" value="opted_out">
Or you could use a menu:
<select name="option">
<option value="opted_in">Opt In</option>
<option value="opted_out">Opt Out</option>
</select>