SGA Story: The Sincerest Form of Flattery
This was inspired by the recent (not really spoilery) photograph of David Hewlett and Rachel Luttrell. It's my first attempt at Atlantis crack, and it is pure crack, with no redeeming social value whatsoever.
( Collapse )
( Collapse )
Me and my elfgina.
I want you to know how terribly hurt and confused I am at this outpouring of viciousness against the lovely and talented Garett Maggart. I have gone through a lengthy and painful operation at great personal expense to have my very own elfgina installed so that I might in some small way feel the love, and I really, really think that you people just don’t understand how to love.
Regretfully, the installer of my elfgina made a fundamental error in its placement; it is, in fact, in the middle of my forehead. The up side is that I can now smoke two cigars at once, and fire ping-pong balls out of my head with great accuracy. And all of these projectiles (and second-hand smoke) will be aimed squarely at YOU, you horde of Garett-hating sweinehunds!
PS Don’t you think that pregnant elf!Blair looks really hot? Seriously.
Regretfully, the installer of my elfgina made a fundamental error in its placement; it is, in fact, in the middle of my forehead. The up side is that I can now smoke two cigars at once, and fire ping-pong balls out of my head with great accuracy. And all of these projectiles (and second-hand smoke) will be aimed squarely at YOU, you horde of Garett-hating sweinehunds!
PS Don’t you think that pregnant elf!Blair looks really hot? Seriously.
-
-
smileyless
-
New Story
Dear Cottonelle:
I bought some of your toilet paper the other day.
Imagine my surprise when I discovered - in mid-wipe, mind you - that it has no perforations on it.
Do you know how frustrating it is to use toilet paper without perforations?
As a result of your negligence, I am now wiping my ass with leaves.
I am enclosing two soiled leaves for your perusal. Perhaps in the future you can package ass-wiping leaves instead of your lousy toilet paper.
Yours truly,
luvhandlz
PS You suck.
Imagine my surprise when I discovered - in mid-wipe, mind you - that it has no perforations on it.
Do you know how frustrating it is to use toilet paper without perforations?
As a result of your negligence, I am now wiping my ass with leaves.
I am enclosing two soiled leaves for your perusal. Perhaps in the future you can package ass-wiping leaves instead of your lousy toilet paper.
Yours truly,
luvhandlz
PS You suck.
Oh noooo....it has a PLOT.
-
- sore
-
More Dragnet. God help me.
The apocalypse is nigh.
You Are the Very Gay Winnie the Pooh! |
Come on, he doesn't wear pants! And he's a little too obsessed with Christopher Robin |
-
-
groggy
-
Bathtime for Joe...
-
-
chipper
-
(no subject)
Personality Quiz
You are an SECF--Sober Emotional Constructive Follower. This makes you a hippie. You are passionate about your causes and steadfast in your commitments. Once you've made up your mind, no one can convince you otherwise. Your politics are left-leaning, and your lifestyle choices decidedly temperate and chaste.
You do tremendous work when focused, but usually you operate somewhat distracted. You blow hot and cold, and while you normally endeavor on the side of goodness and truth, you have a massive mean streak which is not to be taken lightly. You don't get mad, you get even.
Please don't get even with this web site.
You are an SECF--Sober Emotional Constructive Follower. This makes you a hippie. You are passionate about your causes and steadfast in your commitments. Once you've made up your mind, no one can convince you otherwise. Your politics are left-leaning, and your lifestyle choices decidedly temperate and chaste.
You do tremendous work when focused, but usually you operate somewhat distracted. You blow hot and cold, and while you normally endeavor on the side of goodness and truth, you have a massive mean streak which is not to be taken lightly. You don't get mad, you get even.
Please don't get even with this web site.
-
- numb
-