Fic: Babe in the woods (Arthur/Merlin) 1/3
Author/Artist: Ally
Title: Babe in the woods
Word Count: 20,121
Pairing(s): Arthur/Merlin
Rating: NC-17
Summary: When Arthur and Merlin enter the woods to go hunting, the last thing either of them expected to find is a baby. Arthur is wary of the stray, especially since it seems to be garnering the full attention of his manservant. They return to the castle only for Arthur to receive the same treatment from everyone else; ignoring him to lavish attention upon the probably evil 'thing'. There's only room for one spoiled prat in Camelot and Arthur means for it to be him.
Author's Note: This is for
whizzbangpop's big bang challenge.
It had started out a normal day, as most days started. Merlin had brought Arthur his breakfast and attempted to wake him, unsuccessfully hiding his grin of amusement as the Crown Prince of Camelot rolled over and groaned “Fivemoarminnets,” into his pillow. “Fivemoarminnets” turned into “Marphlegrmm”, which was followed and topped by, “NOT MY FEET!” Luckily for Merlin, he pulled back quickly enough to avoid a royal foot in his not-so-royal face.
“Up and at 'em, sire. It's a lovely day for a hunt, which is a good thing, since that's what you're intending to do today. Breakfast?” Merlin moved the plate over to the rumpled and irritated male on the bed.
“Haven't I expressed my severe displeasure at your disgusting amount of overabundant cheer in the morning, Merlin? I'm pretty sure I've made that point more than once.” His morning admonishment having been delivered, Arthur settled in to his breakfast. He was very much looking forward to getting out of the castle, as he was more than certain Morgana's 'lady time' was about – which explained the uncalled for looks of hate and malice cast at him from across the dining table last night. While he would never admit to being afraid of anyone, least of all a slip of a girl – it was safer to just avoid this particular girl until her sanity returned. At least that's how Arthur looked at it. He had a very serious and internal contemplation about why women felt the need to take imagined frustrations out on the male gender while Merlin assisted him in dressing for the day.
Merlin left to gather their horses and equipment for the hunt; Arthur stopping in at the kitchen to grab their already packed meals for the day. He was hoping to be back before dark, but if previous excursions with his servant were anything to go by, it wasn't something he should set in stone. Merlin had the unfortunate ability of being loud and clumsy enough to scare off any game; sometimes for leagues. Normally Arthur found this extremely annoying, since the purpose of a hunt was to hunt things, not stare at the retreating rears of his intended prey. Today was an exception, the hunt being more of an excuse to vacate the premises than to provide dinner.
Mounted, Arthur and Merlin rode leisurely out of Camelot, taking time to enjoy the early morning sun as it warmed the air; flowers opening to soak in the rays while they released their fragrant aromas. Birdsong trilled in the canopy above them as they rode into the forest, the light changing from clear and bright to hazy and filtered green by the spring leaves. The clopping sound of their horses’ hooves on the dirt path was a tempered cadence to the chirps, whistles and rustlings of the wildlife. They took a little-used trail, edging the lake and heading deeper into the woods. Merlin cheerfully took in the scenery, smiling when a squirrel stopped halfway up a tree to turn and chatter at him. Arthur noticed and did nothing to hide the snort of derision. “You are such a girl, Merlin.”
Merlin waited until Arthur had turned back to watch the path before he stuck his tongue out at him. Nodding to himself in satisfaction, he returned to enjoying the calm that seemed to seep from the woods. Merlin hadn’t felt such a sense of peace and serenity in... well... in a very long time, that’s how long. It seemed to dance in the air; making everything seem lighter, more playful. Evidenced by the almost teasing ruffle of wind that brushed through Merlin’s hair, causing the strands to tickle his ear. Merlin could have sworn that the wind was laughing as it passed. The tinkling laughter widened the smile on his face. A few more paces and he heard it again, this time without a breeze to accompany it. Merlin frowned and cocked his head; it was laughter, coming from the woods off the path. “Sire?”
Arthur turned in his saddle to look back at Merlin, who had slowed his horse as he’d tried to discern the direction of the laughter. Arthur took in Merlin’s tilted head and puzzled expression, turning to scan the part of the forest that had caught Merlin’s attention. “What is it?”
“I heard – well, I think I heard – someone laughing.” Merlin had stopped his horse now, fully involved in listening for the elusive sound again.
Arthur frowned. “This far in? I doubt any villagers would be out here for a leisurely picnic...” Arthur trailed off as the unmistakable sound of a high laugh came from the direction Merlin was staring.
“See? Laughter.” Merlin got off his horse and made to enter the woods.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Arthur scowled from his high perch.
Merlin blinked as he turned back to answer the obvious, “I’m going to see who’s laughing.” Merlin made a motion towards the trees with his hands. “You know, in there?”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “What for? If they’re laughing, I doubt they’re in need of anyone poking around to spy on them.”
“But why are they here? So far in? What if they’re lost? What if they’re not from around here and don’t know about the wildlife and some boar or something with claws finds them and mauls them to pieces and it could all have been averted if we had just gone in there and directed them safely to a more commonly used path?”
Arthur blinked and stared at Merlin, who just eyed him woefully back. Throwing up his hands, he lifted his leg and slid from his saddle. “Fine, but if we wind up interrupting something we weren’t meant to, you’re the one that’s going to have to explain the whole ‘saving you from a severe case of mauling’ thing.”
Merlin’s smile split his face as he happily waited for Arthur to take the lead as they headed into the woods to find the source of the mysterious tinkling laughter.
~
“No.” Arthur folded his arms and glared.
“But Arthur, we can’t just leave it here!” Merlin’s wide eyes seemed to be condemning and judging him.
“Why the bloody hell not? Someone else obviously did. And maybe there’s a good reason for it. Maybe it’s cursed. Or evil.”
Merlin’s jaw dropped. “It’s a baby, Arthur. A small, tiny, helpless little baby...” Merlin crooned as he knelt down to tickle the baby’s hand with his finger. The baby fastened its wide green eyes on Merlin, then opened its mouth and let out another peal of baby laughter. Its hand reached for the tickling finger and grasped it tight. It looked in wonder at the finger, then back up to Merlin’s face – which was covered in a look of awe – before bringing the trapped digit to its mouth. Warm gums gnawed on Merlin, drool pooling out to drip down its chin; eyes still locked on Merlin’s.
“Look! See! It’s trying to eat you! What kind of normal baby does that?!” Arthur pointed at the baby while his hand edged to his dagger.
Merlin rolled his eyes and turned to look in mild disgust over his shoulder at the glaring prince. “All babies do that, Arthur. It’s probably teething, poor thing.” Merlin continued to make cutesy little noises at the obviously evil and brain-sucking creature.
Arthur continued to glare. “I don’t like it. What’s a baby doing in the middle of the woods, alone, anyway?”
Merlin answered distractedly, grinning as he reclaimed his hand and played ‘tickle-tummy’ with the baby. “Does it matter? We can’t leave a harmless and defenceless little thing like this alone out here, Arthur.” The bell-like giggles echoed around the sun drenched clearing.
They’d trekked through the dense trees and foliage, guided by the intermittent sounds of the laughter. After twenty minutes of searching, they’d suddenly stumbled into a small, perfectly circular clearing. Wildflowers blazed over the ground like explosions of colour; as though some artist had gone mad and run along tossing vibrant paints around. Dragonflies flew lazily along, emitting a droning buzz as they hovered aimlessly in the air. Flutterby’s seemed to dance with them, a miasma of colour almost blinding both men as they tried to sort through the riot of shades to find the source of the noise. It lay in the centre of the clearing, a bundle of white fabric lined with shots of silver. A chubby fist lifted out from the centre, fingers trying to grab a blindingly bright blue flutterby that was flitting over it. The laugh came again and Arthur and Merlin realised they’d found the source of the mystery; only to have themselves presented with another. Who or what would leave an infant alone in the middle of the woods – woods that were known to be full of lethal and wild animals?
Merlin edged both hands under the bundle, smiling at the ‘oooo’ that came from rounded lips as he lifted the baby. “Don’t pick it up!” Merlin ignored him, cradling the baby against his chest. “Put it back! Put it back down right this instant, Merlin!” Merlin continued to ignore him as he poked a pert little nose, accompanied by a ‘boop’. Arthur glowered at the evil and insidious child. “I mean it, Merlin. You put that thing back on the ground right now, or I’m sacking you... again.” Arthur blinked in shock as Merlin walked past him, still ignoring him, to make his way back to their horses. “Merlin?” Arthur stood there, watching Merlin’s retreating back. “Merlin!” Growling, he took off after his retreating servant. “Bloody wretched babies and their bloody wretched powers of bloody cuteness,” he muttered to himself.
~
Upon returning to the castle – which didn’t happen until late, late, afternoon since Merlin had refused to ride any faster than a walk, “I don’t want to hurt the baby, Arthur.” – Arthur’s annoyance with the child only grew. He was tired and cranky and more than slightly upset at having been ignored all day for an infant. They’d had to stop numerous times so that Merlin could ‘tend’ to its needs; the piercing cry it emitted sending shudders up Arthur’s spine. They’d found out during the first such tending that ‘it’ was a ‘she’.
Merlin had unfastened the cloth around its waist and had folded it back, Arthur peering curiously over his shoulder. The smell had him pulling back in disgust, but not before he’d noticed a glaringly obvious lack of a certain appendage. Blushing, he’d turned his back. “Merlin! You can’t... you’re not allowed... it’s a girl, Merlin!”
Merlin had snorted and continued to clean the child, using his neckerchief as a make-shift diaper. “How very observant, sire. It is, indeed, a girl.”
“But you can’t... she has girl bits, Merlin. You’re a boy!” Arthur’s blush blazed over his face.
“Do you see any women around for me to pass the job off to? Am I supposed to let her sit in her own filth until a woman comes around to do it?” Merlin’s tone clearly indicated his opinion of Arthur at that moment.
“Well, no, but... she’s... a girl...” he finished lamely.
“Yes, and as you’ve stated many times, I may as well be one, so I think I’ll suffice. Besides, girl bits aren’t girl bits when they’re babies. It’s different.” Merlin smiled at the baby, who was blowing bubbles with her chubby little lips. Arthur, not looking, thought the sound was resulting from another action and shuddered accordingly.
Merlin had asked Arthur to hold the baby while he went to the stream and rinsed out the used diaper. Arthur had stared at him in shock and fear while hurriedly backing away. Merlin had rolled his eyes and placed the child in Arthur’s outstretched hands. Arthur had tightened his grasp reflexively, arms still held far from his body. “Merlin....” Arthur whinged, not able to take his eyes off the potentially dangerous creature in his hands. The creature in question stared back at him with hypnotic green eyes. Merlin had come back from his chore to see Arthur and the baby in the same position he’d left them; both with eyes locked on each other. Arthur with his arms holding the child as far from his body as he could, the girl’s fingers tangled in his sleeves.
“Oh for the love of...” Merlin stalked over and took the baby, holding her securely against his body. “Haven’t you ever held a baby before?”
“Why the bloody hell would I?” Arthur looked incredulous.
“Maybe to prepare you for the day you have your own?” Merlin twitched his nose and went over to the horses. Arthur was somewhat surprised to see that Merlin seemed much less clumsier and more agile when he was in possession of the child. He was capable of mounting his horse one-handed, the girl clutched tight to his chest.
“That’s what nursemaids are for, Merlin.” Arthur waved his hand dismissively. “To care for the children and raise them decently. Men have more important things to worry about.”
Merlin gaped at him as though he’d just sprouted a second head. “You really are an immense clotpole sometimes.” Shaking his head, he’d pulled his horse’s head around and continued back towards Camelot.
Arthur was left to scrabble quickly onto his own mount, the insult and feeling of being unimportant simmering in his stomach. This had gone on for the duration of the trip back; Arthur trying to point out the follies and bad judgment in picking up evil, wild stray babies found in the forests, Merlin looking at him like he was the most daft person in the kingdom and ignoring him to lavish attention on the cooing bundle. Arthur glared daggers at the most assuredly evil child. He should be the one being fussed over. Merlin hadn’t once offered him anything today; not even food when they’d stopped for luncheon. Merlin had soaked his bread in water, letting the baby suck the mush off his fingers. Arthur swallowed his disgust, walked over and grabbed an apple before stalking off to throw himself against the trunk of a tree and brood.
Their return to the castle only served to further sour Arthur’s mood. He’d dismounted, handing his reins to the groom when he heard a piercing shriek from across the courtyard. Guinevere had her hands covering her mouth as she hastened over to Merlin, who had smoothly dismounted while holding the child. “Merlin! Is that...? A baby?!” Guinevere tilted her head to the side and made the universal ‘Awwww’ noise that women everywhere seemed to emit when confronted with small children or fluffy animals. “Where did you get a baby from?” Guinevere stroked a finger over a round cheek. The baby blinked bright eyes at her. Arthur scratched her off his list of ‘People to help get rid of the evil pink menace’.
“We found her in the middle of the woods, alone. She doesn’t seem to be any worse for wear from it, though.” Merlin smiled as he held the infant out to Gwen to hold.
The ‘Awwww’ noise made its reappearance as she took the baby, rocking her in the cradle of her arms. “A girl? She’s lovely. What are you going to do with her?”
Merlin shrugged, eyes still fastened on the child in question. “Dunno. Figured I’d take her up to Gaius and have him make sure she’s as alright as she looks, for starters.”
Gwen lowered her face and rubbed her nose along the baby’s. “That sounds like a wonderful idea, doesn’t it, Precious? Yes it does.” Looking up at Merlin, she asked, “What are you calling her?”
Arthur kept ‘soul-sucking dark one’, ‘evil spawn of the devil’ and ‘toothless leech’ behind his clenched jaw. Merlin smiled at the girl and pressed a finger to her lips, a faint blush covering his cheeks. “Actually, I’ve been calling her Sylvana...”
Arthur snorted. “Sylvana? That’s the most ridiculous name I’ve ever heard.”
Guinevere shot a poisoned glare at Arthur, “I think it’s a lovely name, Merlin. Sylvana,” Guinevere slipped off the light bonnet that covered Sylvana’s head. A riot of red-gold curls sprang up. Stroking a finger over her hair, Guinevere gave Merlin a soft look. “I think it suits her.”
“It means ‘of the forest’. I thought it appropriate...” Merlin grinned and held his arms out to take her back. Guinevere passed her over with a wistful sigh. Bending, she placed a kiss on Sylvana’s head. “Come around and see her tomorrow, if Morgana doesn’t mind.”
Gwen laughed. “Morgana will probably be at your door first thing in the morning once she finds out there’s a baby staying here.” Arthur scowled and mentally crossed Morgana off his list as well. The situation was looking very dire.
Propping Sylvana against his chest, Merlin headed into the castle; Sylvana’s eyes finding and holding Arthur’s. He scowled – she giggled. “Bloody baby...” he muttered to himself.
~
Arthur had managed to build himself up into a fine mad as he paced his chambers. Not only had Merlin run off to cater to the whims of a wretched and unimportant baby, but he hadn’t bothered to do any of his evening chores; including feeding his master. Arthur’s stomach grumbled a reminder. “Right. That does it.” Arthur yanked open his door, marching down the corridors and heading for Gaius’s rooms; where Merlin and that... that... baby were sure to be. Probably eating his bloody dinner. Or knowing the baby – poisoning it.
Arthur shook his head as he made his way through the castle. Sylvana. What kind of stupid girly name was Sylvana? And what sort of regular baby had hair that colour? Or that much? And why did she stare at him all the time? Arthur figured she was best figuring on how to drown him with the copious amounts of slobber that poured from her mouth. Teething.... he snorted. He wouldn’t be surprised if she was fanging. He wondered if that was a word; if it wasn’t it should be – and then it should be applied to her. Arthur nodded smugly to himself as he took the stairs up to Gaius’s quarters. He rapped sharply on the door, opening it when he heard a muffled, “Come in.”
He pushed the door open, stepping through and looking for Gaius to ask him of Merlin’s whereabouts – and subsequently, the whereabouts of his food – but the words caught in his throat. Standing there beside Gaius – with a look of absolute ecstasy on his face as he wriggled gloved fingers at the bundle in Merlin’s arms – was his father. Uther Pendragon, King of Camelot, brusque and solemn ruler; brought into a state of delirious glee by a rosy-cheeked giggling infant. Arthur’s brain sort of flopped over in his head, his eye beginning to twitch. Gaius looked over and noticed Arthur, “Sire, come in. Your father just wanted to come by and see if the rumours were true; you and Merlin finding an abandoned baby in the woods.” Gaius moved a pile of cleaning rags off the edge of the bench, a delighted smile on his face as well.
“She’s lovely, isn’t she Arthur?” Uther addressed his son distractedly, eyes only for the smiling child. “Sylvana, hmm?” he asked Merlin. “Lovely name. Suits her...” Uther ran a finger through the springy curls.
“You came to see the baby?” Arthur blinked in confusion.
“Of course,” Uther grinned at Sylvana as she babbled at him. “It’s been a while since there was a child in the castle. I’m surprised at how much I missed it.” Uther blinked, belatedly realising the openness of his words. Straightening, he looked over at Gaius and nodded before reaching down one last time, “Cootchie coo...” he grinned. Turning with a smile still on his face, he made to leave, nodding once at Arthur. “I’ll see you for luncheon tomorrow. I expect you to have come up with an appropriate plan for the child by then.”
Arthur’s mouth worked futilely as he tried to figure out what had just happened. Merlin looked over and tried not to laugh at the confused and completely blown look on his face. “What can I do for you, Arthur?”
Returning to the here and now, Arthur remembered his reason for him being here. “My dinner, Merlin. As well as your chores. Neither of which have been seen to upon your return.”
Merlin nestled Sylvana’s head against his chest. “Oh, yes. Well... as you can see, I’ve been busy...”
“You’ve been busy holding a baby? Will it burst into flames if you put it down? Isn’t Gaius capable of caring for her?” Arthur folded his arms and arched a brow.
Gaius met Arthur’s arched brow with a complex waggling of his own. “And now would be a good time for me to leave.” Gaius grabbed his medical satchel and headed to the door. Turning back to address Merlin, “She can have two more feedings tonight, but she should be in bed soon. You as well, Merlin. You’re going to be the one getting up if she needs anything during the night.” Gaius chuckled before leaving.
Merlin gave Arthur a pointed look. “As you can see, sire, Gaius isn’t available to watch her. And you can’t leave a baby alone, on their own. What if she crawled into the fireplace? Or pulled something down and hurt herself? Babies need constant supervision.” Turning to nuzzle Sylvana’s hair, Arthur heard him mutter, “Not unlike certain spoiled princes.”
Arthur came over to stand by the table, glaring down at Merlin’s dark head. “Baby or no baby, Merlin, your job is to see to my needs. And you’re not. She’s not your baby, so just...” Arthur growled, “give her to someone else and do what you’re supposed to.”
Merlin aimed a smug smile at Arthur, “I’m sure your father wouldn’t mind taking her...”
Arthur gritted his teeth and glared. “Not likely. In fact, if I recall, he seemed to suggest that I was the one to decide what to do with her...”Arthur held out his arms. “Give her to me.”
Merlin frowned and placed a protective hand over her head. “What? No. What for?”
“Well, since you won’t just put her down and you won’t leave her alone, I’ll watch her while you go get my bloody dinner.” Arthur wrinkled his nose at the two sets of wide eyes watching him.
Merlin’s narrowed. “Arthur...”
“As usual, Merlin, you’re forgetting your place. I’m the master, you’re the servant. Now do as you’ve been ordered; give me the baby and go get my dinner.” Arthur still had his hands out.
Slowly, Merlin got to his feet and faced Arthur. “You won’t hurt her?”
Arthur frowned. “What kind of question is that? What do you expect me to do when you leave, throw her out a window?” Arthur growled in exasperation at the look of fear and the twist of Merlin’s body away from him. “I’m not going to throw her out the bloody window, Merlin.”
Merlin looked like he wanted to bolt from the room with the child and it twisted something inside Arthur. Admittedly, he may not care much for the evil and drooling stray, but he wouldn’t actually hurt a child. Merlin looked down at Sylvana, who was babbling and looking over at Arthur. “What is it, love?”
She reached one pudgy hand out and made a grabby motion in Arthur’s direction. Then she turned her big eyes back to Merlin. “Bbllbaaaa!”
“There, see? She knows I won’t hurt her. Now give her here.” Arthur held his arms back out. Merlin looked dubious as he lifted Sylvana to hand her over. Arthur took her in the same position he’d had her in back in the woods; hands clasped around her chest and under her arms, his own held far from his body. He made an attempt at a smile at Merlin. “Satisfied?”
Merlin shook his head and suppressed a grin. “You can’t hold her like that, Arthur. She’s a baby, not a sack of flour. Crook your arm and rest her on it.”
Arthur threw a questioning look at Merlin. “What’s wrong with this? She’s fine. I’m fine. We’re both fine.”
“For now, yes. But your arms will get tired; what if you drop her?”
Arthur felt a sick flutter of fear in his chest at the thought of the baby falling from his grasp. Following Merlin’s instructions, he crooked his left arm and carefully rested Sylvana in it. He was surprised at how fragile she felt. She was unbelievably tiny. He was certain he’d never been that small, even as a baby. “Like this?” He looked over at Merlin.
Merlin had a soft smile on his face at the sight of his prince and the baby, both wary of each other but seemingly drawn to each other’s gaze. Arthur frowned down at her. She giggled. “Yes, like that. I’ll be right back with your dinner, sire.”
And just like that – Arthur was alone in a room with an infant. A tiny, fragile, helpless and sweet-smelling infant. Looking down at her, he decided now was the best time to have a frank heart-to-heart with her. “Now see here, Sylvana...”
Sylvana blinked and looked up at him. “Glaaagh?”
“I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but Merlin is mine. He’s supposed to see to my needs. I know you’re just a baby, but stealing my manservant is just not on.”
Sylvana wrinkled her nose. “Flppppplat!”
“I have nothing against you personally, but babies are strange and smelly and make lots of noise. They put everything in their mouths and they drool and slobber over everything.”
Sylvana made spit bubbles.
“See! Just like that. Lots and lots of drool. And spit up. And they require enormous amounts of attention. This may seem silly, Sylvana, but I can’t say I fancy Merlin spending that much attention on you. It bothers me for some unknown reason.”
Sylvana seemed to consider Arthur and his words. “Mmmmbla...”
“Exactly. So you see, we’re going to have to come to some other arrangement. Because Merlin is mine and you can’t have him.” Arthur nodded, feeling better.
Sylvana stared up at him. “BABABABABA!”
Arthur blinked. “You don’t have to be so rude about it. I mean, really. I’m just stating the obvious.”
Sylvana frowned.
“I still think most babies are completely useless, but you seem to have some sense. Obviously didn’t pick that up from Merlin, did you?”
Sylvana giggled.
Arthur stuck his tongue out at her.
Sylvana laughed and tried to grab it.
“That’s mine too.” Arthur grinned down at the tiny girl in his arms.
“Awwww.” Arthur’s head snapped around to see Merlin with a ridiculously fond expression on his face, Arthur’s dinner in his hand.
Arthur snorted. “Don’t be such a girl.”
Merlin came over, eyes soft and happy. “You two are adorable.”
Arthur narrowed his eyes. “How long were you standing there?”
“Not long...” Merlin grinned and lowered his eyes. Setting the plate on the table, he began to set out Arthur’s utensils.
Arthur looked down at Sylvana and the sudden strange feeling in his chest. It was a warm, spreading feeling. It was spreading over his chest, down to his stomach. Arthur’s brows furrowed in confusion before his brain clicked. Hastily he held the sopping child from him, too late. “Eww! No! Bad baby!”
Merlin looked quickly over, then laughed and went to grab one of the cloths to change her. “It’s just wee, Arthur. Baby wee, at that. It’s practically water.”
“She peed on me!” Arthur wailed. “She did it on purpose!” Arthur glared at child in his hands.
Then it happened – the lower lip came out. Luminous green eyes widened and filled with glistening tears. The lower lip jutted out further; then it quivered. A tear spilled down over plump cheeks, rolling down to drip onto Arthur’s hand. The tiny chest under Arthur’s fingers heaved with a sob, then another. “Aaaawwwr!” Sylvana sobbed fingers reaching for Arthur’s face.
“Arthur! Look what you did.” Merlin scolded, taking Sylvana from his hands and cradling her.
She turned her head to look back at Arthur, one tiny hand reaching for him as she sobbed. “Aaaawwwr!”
Arthur grabbed one of the rags to avoid looking into those tear-filled eyes. He began sopping up the wetness, closing his eyes against the heavy cries. He heard Merlin crooning nonsense at her as he cleaned and changed her, trying futilely to soothe her. She shook her head, hands still reaching for Arthur. Merlin kissed the top of her head, then lifted his to glare at Arthur. “I hope you’re happy.”
Arthur felt something raw gnaw in his gut. “Why would you think that? I didn’t mean to make her cry. She peed on me! What do you expect me to do, throw a party?”
“She’s a baby, Arthur. It’s what they do. Don’t think you didn’t wee on people when you were one.” Merlin glared, trying to shush the still crying child.
“AAAAWWWR!” Sylvana screeched, leaning out of Merlin’s grasp and reaching for Arthur.
Both men blinked at her as they processed the meaning of her cry. “There’s a clean shirt you can borrow in my room...” Merlin looked down at Sylvana in confusion as Arthur quickly went to Merlin’s room to grab the clean garment. The pitch and volume of Sylvana’s cries grew as Arthur left her field of vision, tears pouring from her face; which was reddening as she got more worked up.
Still pulling his head through the neck, Arthur hastily came back to the main room. She turned her tear-stained face to him and tried to throw herself out of Merlin’s arms. “Aaaawwwr!”
Arthur came over and hesitantly reached out for her, he and Merlin both wearing matching looks of shock. Sylvana quickly grabbed onto his hand, bringing her head to rest on his shoulder as he tentatively held her against him. Her shuddering little sobs that shook her body had Arthur wanting to punch himself in the face for being the cause of it. “I’m sorry, Sylvana. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
Sylvana turned her head, sniffling and reaching up to put her hand against his face. “Aaaawwwr...”
And that was it. Arthur crossed himself off his list to get rid of the maybe-not-quite-so-evil baby. He bent his head down to brush his cheek gently across her head, smelling something that was soft and innocent. Turning his eyes to look up at Merlin, he saw the fond look mingled with something else. “There you go again, being a girl.”
Merlin continued to smile, reaching a hand out to stroke a finger through Sylvana’s hair. “Shut up, prat,” he whispered.
~
Part 2
Title: Babe in the woods
Word Count: 20,121
Pairing(s): Arthur/Merlin
Rating: NC-17
Summary: When Arthur and Merlin enter the woods to go hunting, the last thing either of them expected to find is a baby. Arthur is wary of the stray, especially since it seems to be garnering the full attention of his manservant. They return to the castle only for Arthur to receive the same treatment from everyone else; ignoring him to lavish attention upon the probably evil 'thing'. There's only room for one spoiled prat in Camelot and Arthur means for it to be him.
Author's Note: This is for
whizzbangpop's big bang challenge.It had started out a normal day, as most days started. Merlin had brought Arthur his breakfast and attempted to wake him, unsuccessfully hiding his grin of amusement as the Crown Prince of Camelot rolled over and groaned “Fivemoarminnets,” into his pillow. “Fivemoarminnets” turned into “Marphlegrmm”, which was followed and topped by, “NOT MY FEET!” Luckily for Merlin, he pulled back quickly enough to avoid a royal foot in his not-so-royal face.
“Up and at 'em, sire. It's a lovely day for a hunt, which is a good thing, since that's what you're intending to do today. Breakfast?” Merlin moved the plate over to the rumpled and irritated male on the bed.
“Haven't I expressed my severe displeasure at your disgusting amount of overabundant cheer in the morning, Merlin? I'm pretty sure I've made that point more than once.” His morning admonishment having been delivered, Arthur settled in to his breakfast. He was very much looking forward to getting out of the castle, as he was more than certain Morgana's 'lady time' was about – which explained the uncalled for looks of hate and malice cast at him from across the dining table last night. While he would never admit to being afraid of anyone, least of all a slip of a girl – it was safer to just avoid this particular girl until her sanity returned. At least that's how Arthur looked at it. He had a very serious and internal contemplation about why women felt the need to take imagined frustrations out on the male gender while Merlin assisted him in dressing for the day.
Merlin left to gather their horses and equipment for the hunt; Arthur stopping in at the kitchen to grab their already packed meals for the day. He was hoping to be back before dark, but if previous excursions with his servant were anything to go by, it wasn't something he should set in stone. Merlin had the unfortunate ability of being loud and clumsy enough to scare off any game; sometimes for leagues. Normally Arthur found this extremely annoying, since the purpose of a hunt was to hunt things, not stare at the retreating rears of his intended prey. Today was an exception, the hunt being more of an excuse to vacate the premises than to provide dinner.
Mounted, Arthur and Merlin rode leisurely out of Camelot, taking time to enjoy the early morning sun as it warmed the air; flowers opening to soak in the rays while they released their fragrant aromas. Birdsong trilled in the canopy above them as they rode into the forest, the light changing from clear and bright to hazy and filtered green by the spring leaves. The clopping sound of their horses’ hooves on the dirt path was a tempered cadence to the chirps, whistles and rustlings of the wildlife. They took a little-used trail, edging the lake and heading deeper into the woods. Merlin cheerfully took in the scenery, smiling when a squirrel stopped halfway up a tree to turn and chatter at him. Arthur noticed and did nothing to hide the snort of derision. “You are such a girl, Merlin.”
Merlin waited until Arthur had turned back to watch the path before he stuck his tongue out at him. Nodding to himself in satisfaction, he returned to enjoying the calm that seemed to seep from the woods. Merlin hadn’t felt such a sense of peace and serenity in... well... in a very long time, that’s how long. It seemed to dance in the air; making everything seem lighter, more playful. Evidenced by the almost teasing ruffle of wind that brushed through Merlin’s hair, causing the strands to tickle his ear. Merlin could have sworn that the wind was laughing as it passed. The tinkling laughter widened the smile on his face. A few more paces and he heard it again, this time without a breeze to accompany it. Merlin frowned and cocked his head; it was laughter, coming from the woods off the path. “Sire?”
Arthur turned in his saddle to look back at Merlin, who had slowed his horse as he’d tried to discern the direction of the laughter. Arthur took in Merlin’s tilted head and puzzled expression, turning to scan the part of the forest that had caught Merlin’s attention. “What is it?”
“I heard – well, I think I heard – someone laughing.” Merlin had stopped his horse now, fully involved in listening for the elusive sound again.
Arthur frowned. “This far in? I doubt any villagers would be out here for a leisurely picnic...” Arthur trailed off as the unmistakable sound of a high laugh came from the direction Merlin was staring.
“See? Laughter.” Merlin got off his horse and made to enter the woods.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Arthur scowled from his high perch.
Merlin blinked as he turned back to answer the obvious, “I’m going to see who’s laughing.” Merlin made a motion towards the trees with his hands. “You know, in there?”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “What for? If they’re laughing, I doubt they’re in need of anyone poking around to spy on them.”
“But why are they here? So far in? What if they’re lost? What if they’re not from around here and don’t know about the wildlife and some boar or something with claws finds them and mauls them to pieces and it could all have been averted if we had just gone in there and directed them safely to a more commonly used path?”
Arthur blinked and stared at Merlin, who just eyed him woefully back. Throwing up his hands, he lifted his leg and slid from his saddle. “Fine, but if we wind up interrupting something we weren’t meant to, you’re the one that’s going to have to explain the whole ‘saving you from a severe case of mauling’ thing.”
Merlin’s smile split his face as he happily waited for Arthur to take the lead as they headed into the woods to find the source of the mysterious tinkling laughter.
“No.” Arthur folded his arms and glared.
“But Arthur, we can’t just leave it here!” Merlin’s wide eyes seemed to be condemning and judging him.
“Why the bloody hell not? Someone else obviously did. And maybe there’s a good reason for it. Maybe it’s cursed. Or evil.”
Merlin’s jaw dropped. “It’s a baby, Arthur. A small, tiny, helpless little baby...” Merlin crooned as he knelt down to tickle the baby’s hand with his finger. The baby fastened its wide green eyes on Merlin, then opened its mouth and let out another peal of baby laughter. Its hand reached for the tickling finger and grasped it tight. It looked in wonder at the finger, then back up to Merlin’s face – which was covered in a look of awe – before bringing the trapped digit to its mouth. Warm gums gnawed on Merlin, drool pooling out to drip down its chin; eyes still locked on Merlin’s.
“Look! See! It’s trying to eat you! What kind of normal baby does that?!” Arthur pointed at the baby while his hand edged to his dagger.
Merlin rolled his eyes and turned to look in mild disgust over his shoulder at the glaring prince. “All babies do that, Arthur. It’s probably teething, poor thing.” Merlin continued to make cutesy little noises at the obviously evil and brain-sucking creature.
Arthur continued to glare. “I don’t like it. What’s a baby doing in the middle of the woods, alone, anyway?”
Merlin answered distractedly, grinning as he reclaimed his hand and played ‘tickle-tummy’ with the baby. “Does it matter? We can’t leave a harmless and defenceless little thing like this alone out here, Arthur.” The bell-like giggles echoed around the sun drenched clearing.
They’d trekked through the dense trees and foliage, guided by the intermittent sounds of the laughter. After twenty minutes of searching, they’d suddenly stumbled into a small, perfectly circular clearing. Wildflowers blazed over the ground like explosions of colour; as though some artist had gone mad and run along tossing vibrant paints around. Dragonflies flew lazily along, emitting a droning buzz as they hovered aimlessly in the air. Flutterby’s seemed to dance with them, a miasma of colour almost blinding both men as they tried to sort through the riot of shades to find the source of the noise. It lay in the centre of the clearing, a bundle of white fabric lined with shots of silver. A chubby fist lifted out from the centre, fingers trying to grab a blindingly bright blue flutterby that was flitting over it. The laugh came again and Arthur and Merlin realised they’d found the source of the mystery; only to have themselves presented with another. Who or what would leave an infant alone in the middle of the woods – woods that were known to be full of lethal and wild animals?
Merlin edged both hands under the bundle, smiling at the ‘oooo’ that came from rounded lips as he lifted the baby. “Don’t pick it up!” Merlin ignored him, cradling the baby against his chest. “Put it back! Put it back down right this instant, Merlin!” Merlin continued to ignore him as he poked a pert little nose, accompanied by a ‘boop’. Arthur glowered at the evil and insidious child. “I mean it, Merlin. You put that thing back on the ground right now, or I’m sacking you... again.” Arthur blinked in shock as Merlin walked past him, still ignoring him, to make his way back to their horses. “Merlin?” Arthur stood there, watching Merlin’s retreating back. “Merlin!” Growling, he took off after his retreating servant. “Bloody wretched babies and their bloody wretched powers of bloody cuteness,” he muttered to himself.
Upon returning to the castle – which didn’t happen until late, late, afternoon since Merlin had refused to ride any faster than a walk, “I don’t want to hurt the baby, Arthur.” – Arthur’s annoyance with the child only grew. He was tired and cranky and more than slightly upset at having been ignored all day for an infant. They’d had to stop numerous times so that Merlin could ‘tend’ to its needs; the piercing cry it emitted sending shudders up Arthur’s spine. They’d found out during the first such tending that ‘it’ was a ‘she’.
Merlin had unfastened the cloth around its waist and had folded it back, Arthur peering curiously over his shoulder. The smell had him pulling back in disgust, but not before he’d noticed a glaringly obvious lack of a certain appendage. Blushing, he’d turned his back. “Merlin! You can’t... you’re not allowed... it’s a girl, Merlin!”
Merlin had snorted and continued to clean the child, using his neckerchief as a make-shift diaper. “How very observant, sire. It is, indeed, a girl.”
“But you can’t... she has girl bits, Merlin. You’re a boy!” Arthur’s blush blazed over his face.
“Do you see any women around for me to pass the job off to? Am I supposed to let her sit in her own filth until a woman comes around to do it?” Merlin’s tone clearly indicated his opinion of Arthur at that moment.
“Well, no, but... she’s... a girl...” he finished lamely.
“Yes, and as you’ve stated many times, I may as well be one, so I think I’ll suffice. Besides, girl bits aren’t girl bits when they’re babies. It’s different.” Merlin smiled at the baby, who was blowing bubbles with her chubby little lips. Arthur, not looking, thought the sound was resulting from another action and shuddered accordingly.
Merlin had asked Arthur to hold the baby while he went to the stream and rinsed out the used diaper. Arthur had stared at him in shock and fear while hurriedly backing away. Merlin had rolled his eyes and placed the child in Arthur’s outstretched hands. Arthur had tightened his grasp reflexively, arms still held far from his body. “Merlin....” Arthur whinged, not able to take his eyes off the potentially dangerous creature in his hands. The creature in question stared back at him with hypnotic green eyes. Merlin had come back from his chore to see Arthur and the baby in the same position he’d left them; both with eyes locked on each other. Arthur with his arms holding the child as far from his body as he could, the girl’s fingers tangled in his sleeves.
“Oh for the love of...” Merlin stalked over and took the baby, holding her securely against his body. “Haven’t you ever held a baby before?”
“Why the bloody hell would I?” Arthur looked incredulous.
“Maybe to prepare you for the day you have your own?” Merlin twitched his nose and went over to the horses. Arthur was somewhat surprised to see that Merlin seemed much less clumsier and more agile when he was in possession of the child. He was capable of mounting his horse one-handed, the girl clutched tight to his chest.
“That’s what nursemaids are for, Merlin.” Arthur waved his hand dismissively. “To care for the children and raise them decently. Men have more important things to worry about.”
Merlin gaped at him as though he’d just sprouted a second head. “You really are an immense clotpole sometimes.” Shaking his head, he’d pulled his horse’s head around and continued back towards Camelot.
Arthur was left to scrabble quickly onto his own mount, the insult and feeling of being unimportant simmering in his stomach. This had gone on for the duration of the trip back; Arthur trying to point out the follies and bad judgment in picking up evil, wild stray babies found in the forests, Merlin looking at him like he was the most daft person in the kingdom and ignoring him to lavish attention on the cooing bundle. Arthur glared daggers at the most assuredly evil child. He should be the one being fussed over. Merlin hadn’t once offered him anything today; not even food when they’d stopped for luncheon. Merlin had soaked his bread in water, letting the baby suck the mush off his fingers. Arthur swallowed his disgust, walked over and grabbed an apple before stalking off to throw himself against the trunk of a tree and brood.
Their return to the castle only served to further sour Arthur’s mood. He’d dismounted, handing his reins to the groom when he heard a piercing shriek from across the courtyard. Guinevere had her hands covering her mouth as she hastened over to Merlin, who had smoothly dismounted while holding the child. “Merlin! Is that...? A baby?!” Guinevere tilted her head to the side and made the universal ‘Awwww’ noise that women everywhere seemed to emit when confronted with small children or fluffy animals. “Where did you get a baby from?” Guinevere stroked a finger over a round cheek. The baby blinked bright eyes at her. Arthur scratched her off his list of ‘People to help get rid of the evil pink menace’.
“We found her in the middle of the woods, alone. She doesn’t seem to be any worse for wear from it, though.” Merlin smiled as he held the infant out to Gwen to hold.
The ‘Awwww’ noise made its reappearance as she took the baby, rocking her in the cradle of her arms. “A girl? She’s lovely. What are you going to do with her?”
Merlin shrugged, eyes still fastened on the child in question. “Dunno. Figured I’d take her up to Gaius and have him make sure she’s as alright as she looks, for starters.”
Gwen lowered her face and rubbed her nose along the baby’s. “That sounds like a wonderful idea, doesn’t it, Precious? Yes it does.” Looking up at Merlin, she asked, “What are you calling her?”
Arthur kept ‘soul-sucking dark one’, ‘evil spawn of the devil’ and ‘toothless leech’ behind his clenched jaw. Merlin smiled at the girl and pressed a finger to her lips, a faint blush covering his cheeks. “Actually, I’ve been calling her Sylvana...”
Arthur snorted. “Sylvana? That’s the most ridiculous name I’ve ever heard.”
Guinevere shot a poisoned glare at Arthur, “I think it’s a lovely name, Merlin. Sylvana,” Guinevere slipped off the light bonnet that covered Sylvana’s head. A riot of red-gold curls sprang up. Stroking a finger over her hair, Guinevere gave Merlin a soft look. “I think it suits her.”
“It means ‘of the forest’. I thought it appropriate...” Merlin grinned and held his arms out to take her back. Guinevere passed her over with a wistful sigh. Bending, she placed a kiss on Sylvana’s head. “Come around and see her tomorrow, if Morgana doesn’t mind.”
Gwen laughed. “Morgana will probably be at your door first thing in the morning once she finds out there’s a baby staying here.” Arthur scowled and mentally crossed Morgana off his list as well. The situation was looking very dire.
Propping Sylvana against his chest, Merlin headed into the castle; Sylvana’s eyes finding and holding Arthur’s. He scowled – she giggled. “Bloody baby...” he muttered to himself.
Arthur had managed to build himself up into a fine mad as he paced his chambers. Not only had Merlin run off to cater to the whims of a wretched and unimportant baby, but he hadn’t bothered to do any of his evening chores; including feeding his master. Arthur’s stomach grumbled a reminder. “Right. That does it.” Arthur yanked open his door, marching down the corridors and heading for Gaius’s rooms; where Merlin and that... that... baby were sure to be. Probably eating his bloody dinner. Or knowing the baby – poisoning it.
Arthur shook his head as he made his way through the castle. Sylvana. What kind of stupid girly name was Sylvana? And what sort of regular baby had hair that colour? Or that much? And why did she stare at him all the time? Arthur figured she was best figuring on how to drown him with the copious amounts of slobber that poured from her mouth. Teething.... he snorted. He wouldn’t be surprised if she was fanging. He wondered if that was a word; if it wasn’t it should be – and then it should be applied to her. Arthur nodded smugly to himself as he took the stairs up to Gaius’s quarters. He rapped sharply on the door, opening it when he heard a muffled, “Come in.”
He pushed the door open, stepping through and looking for Gaius to ask him of Merlin’s whereabouts – and subsequently, the whereabouts of his food – but the words caught in his throat. Standing there beside Gaius – with a look of absolute ecstasy on his face as he wriggled gloved fingers at the bundle in Merlin’s arms – was his father. Uther Pendragon, King of Camelot, brusque and solemn ruler; brought into a state of delirious glee by a rosy-cheeked giggling infant. Arthur’s brain sort of flopped over in his head, his eye beginning to twitch. Gaius looked over and noticed Arthur, “Sire, come in. Your father just wanted to come by and see if the rumours were true; you and Merlin finding an abandoned baby in the woods.” Gaius moved a pile of cleaning rags off the edge of the bench, a delighted smile on his face as well.
“She’s lovely, isn’t she Arthur?” Uther addressed his son distractedly, eyes only for the smiling child. “Sylvana, hmm?” he asked Merlin. “Lovely name. Suits her...” Uther ran a finger through the springy curls.
“You came to see the baby?” Arthur blinked in confusion.
“Of course,” Uther grinned at Sylvana as she babbled at him. “It’s been a while since there was a child in the castle. I’m surprised at how much I missed it.” Uther blinked, belatedly realising the openness of his words. Straightening, he looked over at Gaius and nodded before reaching down one last time, “Cootchie coo...” he grinned. Turning with a smile still on his face, he made to leave, nodding once at Arthur. “I’ll see you for luncheon tomorrow. I expect you to have come up with an appropriate plan for the child by then.”
Arthur’s mouth worked futilely as he tried to figure out what had just happened. Merlin looked over and tried not to laugh at the confused and completely blown look on his face. “What can I do for you, Arthur?”
Returning to the here and now, Arthur remembered his reason for him being here. “My dinner, Merlin. As well as your chores. Neither of which have been seen to upon your return.”
Merlin nestled Sylvana’s head against his chest. “Oh, yes. Well... as you can see, I’ve been busy...”
“You’ve been busy holding a baby? Will it burst into flames if you put it down? Isn’t Gaius capable of caring for her?” Arthur folded his arms and arched a brow.
Gaius met Arthur’s arched brow with a complex waggling of his own. “And now would be a good time for me to leave.” Gaius grabbed his medical satchel and headed to the door. Turning back to address Merlin, “She can have two more feedings tonight, but she should be in bed soon. You as well, Merlin. You’re going to be the one getting up if she needs anything during the night.” Gaius chuckled before leaving.
Merlin gave Arthur a pointed look. “As you can see, sire, Gaius isn’t available to watch her. And you can’t leave a baby alone, on their own. What if she crawled into the fireplace? Or pulled something down and hurt herself? Babies need constant supervision.” Turning to nuzzle Sylvana’s hair, Arthur heard him mutter, “Not unlike certain spoiled princes.”
Arthur came over to stand by the table, glaring down at Merlin’s dark head. “Baby or no baby, Merlin, your job is to see to my needs. And you’re not. She’s not your baby, so just...” Arthur growled, “give her to someone else and do what you’re supposed to.”
Merlin aimed a smug smile at Arthur, “I’m sure your father wouldn’t mind taking her...”
Arthur gritted his teeth and glared. “Not likely. In fact, if I recall, he seemed to suggest that I was the one to decide what to do with her...”Arthur held out his arms. “Give her to me.”
Merlin frowned and placed a protective hand over her head. “What? No. What for?”
“Well, since you won’t just put her down and you won’t leave her alone, I’ll watch her while you go get my bloody dinner.” Arthur wrinkled his nose at the two sets of wide eyes watching him.
Merlin’s narrowed. “Arthur...”
“As usual, Merlin, you’re forgetting your place. I’m the master, you’re the servant. Now do as you’ve been ordered; give me the baby and go get my dinner.” Arthur still had his hands out.
Slowly, Merlin got to his feet and faced Arthur. “You won’t hurt her?”
Arthur frowned. “What kind of question is that? What do you expect me to do when you leave, throw her out a window?” Arthur growled in exasperation at the look of fear and the twist of Merlin’s body away from him. “I’m not going to throw her out the bloody window, Merlin.”
Merlin looked like he wanted to bolt from the room with the child and it twisted something inside Arthur. Admittedly, he may not care much for the evil and drooling stray, but he wouldn’t actually hurt a child. Merlin looked down at Sylvana, who was babbling and looking over at Arthur. “What is it, love?”
She reached one pudgy hand out and made a grabby motion in Arthur’s direction. Then she turned her big eyes back to Merlin. “Bbllbaaaa!”
“There, see? She knows I won’t hurt her. Now give her here.” Arthur held his arms back out. Merlin looked dubious as he lifted Sylvana to hand her over. Arthur took her in the same position he’d had her in back in the woods; hands clasped around her chest and under her arms, his own held far from his body. He made an attempt at a smile at Merlin. “Satisfied?”
Merlin shook his head and suppressed a grin. “You can’t hold her like that, Arthur. She’s a baby, not a sack of flour. Crook your arm and rest her on it.”
Arthur threw a questioning look at Merlin. “What’s wrong with this? She’s fine. I’m fine. We’re both fine.”
“For now, yes. But your arms will get tired; what if you drop her?”
Arthur felt a sick flutter of fear in his chest at the thought of the baby falling from his grasp. Following Merlin’s instructions, he crooked his left arm and carefully rested Sylvana in it. He was surprised at how fragile she felt. She was unbelievably tiny. He was certain he’d never been that small, even as a baby. “Like this?” He looked over at Merlin.
Merlin had a soft smile on his face at the sight of his prince and the baby, both wary of each other but seemingly drawn to each other’s gaze. Arthur frowned down at her. She giggled. “Yes, like that. I’ll be right back with your dinner, sire.”
And just like that – Arthur was alone in a room with an infant. A tiny, fragile, helpless and sweet-smelling infant. Looking down at her, he decided now was the best time to have a frank heart-to-heart with her. “Now see here, Sylvana...”
Sylvana blinked and looked up at him. “Glaaagh?”
“I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but Merlin is mine. He’s supposed to see to my needs. I know you’re just a baby, but stealing my manservant is just not on.”
Sylvana wrinkled her nose. “Flppppplat!”
“I have nothing against you personally, but babies are strange and smelly and make lots of noise. They put everything in their mouths and they drool and slobber over everything.”
Sylvana made spit bubbles.
“See! Just like that. Lots and lots of drool. And spit up. And they require enormous amounts of attention. This may seem silly, Sylvana, but I can’t say I fancy Merlin spending that much attention on you. It bothers me for some unknown reason.”
Sylvana seemed to consider Arthur and his words. “Mmmmbla...”
“Exactly. So you see, we’re going to have to come to some other arrangement. Because Merlin is mine and you can’t have him.” Arthur nodded, feeling better.
Sylvana stared up at him. “BABABABABA!”
Arthur blinked. “You don’t have to be so rude about it. I mean, really. I’m just stating the obvious.”
Sylvana frowned.
“I still think most babies are completely useless, but you seem to have some sense. Obviously didn’t pick that up from Merlin, did you?”
Sylvana giggled.
Arthur stuck his tongue out at her.
Sylvana laughed and tried to grab it.
“That’s mine too.” Arthur grinned down at the tiny girl in his arms.
“Awwww.” Arthur’s head snapped around to see Merlin with a ridiculously fond expression on his face, Arthur’s dinner in his hand.
Arthur snorted. “Don’t be such a girl.”
Merlin came over, eyes soft and happy. “You two are adorable.”
Arthur narrowed his eyes. “How long were you standing there?”
“Not long...” Merlin grinned and lowered his eyes. Setting the plate on the table, he began to set out Arthur’s utensils.
Arthur looked down at Sylvana and the sudden strange feeling in his chest. It was a warm, spreading feeling. It was spreading over his chest, down to his stomach. Arthur’s brows furrowed in confusion before his brain clicked. Hastily he held the sopping child from him, too late. “Eww! No! Bad baby!”
Merlin looked quickly over, then laughed and went to grab one of the cloths to change her. “It’s just wee, Arthur. Baby wee, at that. It’s practically water.”
“She peed on me!” Arthur wailed. “She did it on purpose!” Arthur glared at child in his hands.
Then it happened – the lower lip came out. Luminous green eyes widened and filled with glistening tears. The lower lip jutted out further; then it quivered. A tear spilled down over plump cheeks, rolling down to drip onto Arthur’s hand. The tiny chest under Arthur’s fingers heaved with a sob, then another. “Aaaawwwr!” Sylvana sobbed fingers reaching for Arthur’s face.
“Arthur! Look what you did.” Merlin scolded, taking Sylvana from his hands and cradling her.
She turned her head to look back at Arthur, one tiny hand reaching for him as she sobbed. “Aaaawwwr!”
Arthur grabbed one of the rags to avoid looking into those tear-filled eyes. He began sopping up the wetness, closing his eyes against the heavy cries. He heard Merlin crooning nonsense at her as he cleaned and changed her, trying futilely to soothe her. She shook her head, hands still reaching for Arthur. Merlin kissed the top of her head, then lifted his to glare at Arthur. “I hope you’re happy.”
Arthur felt something raw gnaw in his gut. “Why would you think that? I didn’t mean to make her cry. She peed on me! What do you expect me to do, throw a party?”
“She’s a baby, Arthur. It’s what they do. Don’t think you didn’t wee on people when you were one.” Merlin glared, trying to shush the still crying child.
“AAAAWWWR!” Sylvana screeched, leaning out of Merlin’s grasp and reaching for Arthur.
Both men blinked at her as they processed the meaning of her cry. “There’s a clean shirt you can borrow in my room...” Merlin looked down at Sylvana in confusion as Arthur quickly went to Merlin’s room to grab the clean garment. The pitch and volume of Sylvana’s cries grew as Arthur left her field of vision, tears pouring from her face; which was reddening as she got more worked up.
Still pulling his head through the neck, Arthur hastily came back to the main room. She turned her tear-stained face to him and tried to throw herself out of Merlin’s arms. “Aaaawwwr!”
Arthur came over and hesitantly reached out for her, he and Merlin both wearing matching looks of shock. Sylvana quickly grabbed onto his hand, bringing her head to rest on his shoulder as he tentatively held her against him. Her shuddering little sobs that shook her body had Arthur wanting to punch himself in the face for being the cause of it. “I’m sorry, Sylvana. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
Sylvana turned her head, sniffling and reaching up to put her hand against his face. “Aaaawwwr...”
And that was it. Arthur crossed himself off his list to get rid of the maybe-not-quite-so-evil baby. He bent his head down to brush his cheek gently across her head, smelling something that was soft and innocent. Turning his eyes to look up at Merlin, he saw the fond look mingled with something else. “There you go again, being a girl.”
Merlin continued to smile, reaching a hand out to stroke a finger through Sylvana’s hair. “Shut up, prat,” he whispered.
Part 2