if we had cat ears it would kinda be a problem because my ears would be permanently locked on airplane mode and everyone will think im ungrateful and full of hate and they would be correct

romanticizing your life is such a powerful tool and it’s a shame that it’s mostly used by people on tiktok to justify the purchase of expensive breakfast smoothies when there are few better ways to force oneself through unpleasant shit than imagining a cinematic backstory for your extremely quotidian suffering

finding the strength to walk home from the library at 3am in the freezing rain by imagining yourself as a Napoleonic soldier hightailing it from Moscow in 1813

please invent an even dimmer brightness level i am begging

i love it when people say hi to their mutuals on posts that broke containment. it's like their friend is up on a stage and they're waving enthusiastically and giving them a thumbs up from the crowd

I have a degree in environmental biology you can trust me 👍

oughhhhhhh. you know when you're reading and th second hand embarrassment becomes palpable. these guys need to make better decisions idk what to tell you

They Must Be Stopped

nope 👎 absolutely not ❌

death . murder. this is no longer relaxing 2am reading i want him PUNISGED for ruining my . well morning i suppose

oughhhhhhh. you know when you're reading and th second hand embarrassment becomes palpable. these guys need to make better decisions idk what to tell you

They Must Be Stopped

nope 👎 absolutely not ❌

1960s business card

oughhhhhhh. you know when you're reading and th second hand embarrassment becomes palpable. these guys need to make better decisions idk what to tell you

They Must Be Stopped

we have two eyeballs to see in 3d. we have two ears to listen in stereo. we have two nostrils for like. fuck all i guess. its all connected anyway. who fucking cares. (looks it up) So that one of them can take a nap or something

"Quick" "easy" "lazy" recipes love to pretend that prep and cleanup occur within a pocket dimension outside time and space.

When you’re at the bus stop on time: bus schedules are more like guidelines than hard rules, really. You will sit in the 90 degree heat for an extra 15 minutes past the scheduled arrival time wondering if the bus has decided to just skip today and you will like it.

When you are running even a single minute late: the noble city bus has a schedule to keep and it will dally not a single second longer. Be better