introduction

hello everyone :)  i found this community through a bootblacking community i'm in.  i belong to a butch top, i call Hym Daddy with pride :)  we've been together for over two years now, and were friends for about 4 years before that.   we love to play, and i love to serve my Daddy as much as Hy loves to take care of me.  sadly, life gets in the way a lot of the time... we have kids and the recent death of my father which has lead to me spending more time with my mother and just... well life in general seems to plot against us.  

i'm in a state of depression, and trying to remember why i should keep breathing.  Daddy and my family help some days, but others i can convince myself they're all better off without me.  i'm trying to get my spark for living back, if that makes sense.  the last year was spent taking care of my father while cancer ate him away, and our leather relationship has suffered a bit.  thankfully the partnership and friendship remain strong.... we love eachother very much and Daddy has been wonderful through the hard times.

sorry to have rambled... i saw this community and wanted to be a part of it to get new ideas and rekindle my love of serving my Daddy.  doing things because i want to, not because i've had to as with my father, mother, children, etc.  i'm also interested in learning more about service in general, as this is my first experience with bdsm, butch tops, Daddy/girl, leather... you name it, i'm pretty new to it!  luckily Daddy has been involved in the leather community for about 15 years.

i'm normally quite a lurker but am trying to be more involved.  i tend to come off wrong, can be socially retarded for the most part but i mean well.  however i do here, thanks for letting me join the group!  nice to meet you all :)