Because in the lalaland nothing matters...
Hey everyone =)
Well I can see that comments are on strike... more than 100 visits in two days and just 4 comments lol Anyway I won't say anything 'cause I'm not a good lj friend neither so...
I didn't think I would post as soon but I'm under pressure since yesterday and more now so I need to relax. Mybulgarian girl doesn't seem to be around, maybe she felt that... They are very strong Bulgarians... very strong... xD I forgot, maybe she aslo pukes everywhere... if it's the case take care of you, I'll send you my deep positive thoughts xD (That phrase doesn't have any sense but I have no sense today -_-')
So I don't have other choice than lj and photoshop anyway lol
EXAM PRESSURE
Yeah I have my last big, big, big oral wednesday afternoon where I have to explain my "exportation file" in front of 2 professionnals... even if it's just a training for the real graduation one, our teachers love put us the pressure 'cause the professionnals aren't here for crap...
Anyway they did a great job with me 'cause I can easily smile and doing like if it was just another "test" but what I want is to go in my car, alone, lie, put the music as strong as I can and close my eyes... Pressure make me sleep like 3 hour per night so my mood isn't really great and as I'm really complicated I prefer stay far away from the other lol Only my friend decided that it was enough and make me run 1 hour during Physical Education... It worked at the beginning but now... alright I need to do a lot of abs..
So we all need somebody who pushes you even if it's hard and don't let you down. Someone to tell you: "Now you gotta stop that, get up, I know you'll be fine". It's just one stupid phrase but that phrase means a lot.
So there it is... the pressure I'll have till wednesday... F**************CK
ABOUT FRIENDSHIP?
I was thinking about friendship these last days: online and in actual life.
For god sake I hate so much online friendship sometimes (stop screaming it's not what you're thinking). I'm always saying that I'm the rebel and at the end I'm the most into. Is that logical? -_-'
Anyway I have to admit that sometimes online friendship seems more real than friendship in real life so we can be more attached... You know that the other appreciate you for who you are, nothing to expect at the beginning, if something fails, you can go away without thinking about repercussions, you're less affraid to talk, to be judge, you learn sometimes more because of the culture.
While I'm writing, I'm thinking that the most beautiful friendships I saw are born from internet...
It could sound completely crazy and even right now I'm thinking that this is completely crazy but... whow that's real. Internet is our generation and its creation is probably the best thing we ever have. Communicate like that with different people so far away from where we live, and that just because all that waves. Shit the earth is just so magical *_*
But it can aslo hurt more than a real life friendship for sure... And behind my strong character I'm a big sensitive xD And with shame I admit that I was more hurt by online friendship than real friendship where I just said "Hum, yeah okay get the hell out of here if you want -_-'"
Know people are just so easy. Everyone knows people. We're all hang out with people everyday... Sometimes our road just crossed for like a day, a months, a year and then nothing anymore. We called some persons "friends" but in all the people you've got around you, HOW MANY are the REAL friend? and not just physical... by real I'm saying, the person to whom you can say everything, the person who we'll be here morally when you'll need help... Friends are everywhere, Real friends like I described can be count on just one hand. If I can be honnest, whatever if I look crazy one of this person even if it was for one year or some months were always from online friendship... We got our numbers, texting, calling the only difference was that we can see each other only by pics or video (and sometimes you can actually meet each other as it happens one or twice for me)
But as I said it hurts more so when I discovered that feeling for the first time, I promess myself that it won't happen again... but it happened again.... and again.... and... anyway... everytime I screw up everything 'cause I'm self-destruction and I'm affraid lol How am I doing that? Always trying to have a fight and make people go away... well anyway I'm doing that even in life of everyday so... BUUUUT I'm working on it xD
So positive thing I don't regret 'cause there were gorgeous moment.
So now that I broke again my promess (yeahwhen i'm saying that I'm self-destruction) I'm waiting for the moment where I'm going to screw up everything xD which couldn't be really late 'cause when she's gonna read that post she'll probably gonna be affraid and she'll think that I should go to a hospital or something like that xD Maybe she's right after all. Anyway the whole world is falling appart so... Well at least maybe she will be lazy to read...
So whatever I won't go against things which are the truth. I saw it, I lived it and people who can't live that even once in their life, well I'm sad for them 'cause they are missing something.
What does the word REAL mean finally ?
PS: of course I got a big thought for the friend I have around me everyday (or almost lol) and sorry for my mistakes...
________________________________________
Whow I didn't expect that it would be as long as it actually is lol But what about graphics?
Ps: Thanks everyone for your visits
[02] Banners/headers livejournal
[02] Wallpapers
Well I can see that comments are on strike... more than 100 visits in two days and just 4 comments lol Anyway I won't say anything 'cause I'm not a good lj friend neither so...
I didn't think I would post as soon but I'm under pressure since yesterday and more now so I need to relax. My
So I don't have other choice than lj and photoshop anyway lol
EXAM PRESSURE
Yeah I have my last big, big, big oral wednesday afternoon where I have to explain my "exportation file" in front of 2 professionnals... even if it's just a training for the real graduation one, our teachers love put us the pressure 'cause the professionnals aren't here for crap...
Anyway they did a great job with me 'cause I can easily smile and doing like if it was just another "test" but what I want is to go in my car, alone, lie, put the music as strong as I can and close my eyes... Pressure make me sleep like 3 hour per night so my mood isn't really great and as I'm really complicated I prefer stay far away from the other lol Only my friend decided that it was enough and make me run 1 hour during Physical Education... It worked at the beginning but now... alright I need to do a lot of abs..
So we all need somebody who pushes you even if it's hard and don't let you down. Someone to tell you: "Now you gotta stop that, get up, I know you'll be fine". It's just one stupid phrase but that phrase means a lot.
So there it is... the pressure I'll have till wednesday... F**************CK
ABOUT FRIENDSHIP?
I was thinking about friendship these last days: online and in actual life.
For god sake I hate so much online friendship sometimes (stop screaming it's not what you're thinking). I'm always saying that I'm the rebel and at the end I'm the most into. Is that logical? -_-'
Anyway I have to admit that sometimes online friendship seems more real than friendship in real life so we can be more attached... You know that the other appreciate you for who you are, nothing to expect at the beginning, if something fails, you can go away without thinking about repercussions, you're less affraid to talk, to be judge, you learn sometimes more because of the culture.
While I'm writing, I'm thinking that the most beautiful friendships I saw are born from internet...
It could sound completely crazy and even right now I'm thinking that this is completely crazy but... whow that's real. Internet is our generation and its creation is probably the best thing we ever have. Communicate like that with different people so far away from where we live, and that just because all that waves. Shit the earth is just so magical *_*
But it can aslo hurt more than a real life friendship for sure... And behind my strong character I'm a big sensitive xD And with shame I admit that I was more hurt by online friendship than real friendship where I just said "Hum, yeah okay get the hell out of here if you want -_-'"
Know people are just so easy. Everyone knows people. We're all hang out with people everyday... Sometimes our road just crossed for like a day, a months, a year and then nothing anymore. We called some persons "friends" but in all the people you've got around you, HOW MANY are the REAL friend? and not just physical... by real I'm saying, the person to whom you can say everything, the person who we'll be here morally when you'll need help... Friends are everywhere, Real friends like I described can be count on just one hand. If I can be honnest, whatever if I look crazy one of this person even if it was for one year or some months were always from online friendship... We got our numbers, texting, calling the only difference was that we can see each other only by pics or video (and sometimes you can actually meet each other as it happens one or twice for me)
But as I said it hurts more so when I discovered that feeling for the first time, I promess myself that it won't happen again... but it happened again.... and again.... and... anyway... everytime I screw up everything 'cause I'm self-destruction and I'm affraid lol How am I doing that? Always trying to have a fight and make people go away... well anyway I'm doing that even in life of everyday so... BUUUUT I'm working on it xD
So positive thing I don't regret 'cause there were gorgeous moment.
So now that I broke again my promess (yeahwhen i'm saying that I'm self-destruction) I'm waiting for the moment where I'm going to screw up everything xD which couldn't be really late 'cause when she's gonna read that post she'll probably gonna be affraid and she'll think that I should go to a hospital or something like that xD Maybe she's right after all. Anyway the whole world is falling appart so... Well at least maybe she will be lazy to read...
So whatever I won't go against things which are the truth. I saw it, I lived it and people who can't live that even once in their life, well I'm sad for them 'cause they are missing something.
What does the word REAL mean finally ?
PS: of course I got a big thought for the friend I have around me everyday (or almost lol) and sorry for my mistakes...
________________________________________
Whow I didn't expect that it would be as long as it actually is lol But what about graphics?
Ps: Thanks everyone for your visits
[02] Banners/headers livejournal
[02] Wallpapers
